Scott Warrick Show Notes Page

Scott Warrick had a client that all of a sudden stopped communicating with him. After several attempts to connect without response, Scott learned he said something that offended someone during a workshop. After losing a lot of sleep, he resolved himself to the fact that he needed to take care of himself to move forward.

Scott Warrick was born and raised in Newark, Ohio. His father was a machine operator at Kaiser Aluminum and his mother was a secretary. He was the perfectly placed middle child, with a sister three years older than him, Pam, and Kelly, a brother three years younger than him.  Kelly passed away suddenly in January of 2018 at the age of 53. Kelly was one of Scott’s closest and dearest friends.

Scott paid for his own undergraduate degree by working at Owens Corning Fiberglas making ceiling tile and packaging glass wool. That was also the first union Scott joined. He was part of the GBBA, or Glass Bottle Blowers Association. Scott went onto work several jobs while carrying a full load of classes at The Ohio State University. In 1983, Scott earned his undergraduate degree in Organizational Communication. This is the degree Scott uses more today than all the others. Resolving Conflict is always the key.

Scott then started his career in human resources by holding a dual role at the Kirby Vacuum Cleaner Company. He was their Director of Human Resources by day and a vacuum cleaner salesman by night and weekends.

To earn money for his graduate degree, he worked in another factory, Kaiser Aluminum. That was the second union Scott joined, the Steelworkers. Scott then graduated from The Ohio State University in 1986 with his Master of Labor & Human Resources degree.

Scott then worked in human resources in various organizations throughout the later 1980s. At that time, the law was swallowing HR. So, while he was working as the Director of Human Resources at First Investment Company in Columbus Ohio, he was accepted at Capital University College of Law in 1992. Scott graduated from Capital in 1996 as Class Valedictorian (1st out of 233).

Scott then practiced traditional law from 1996 to 1998, but absolutely hated it. Scott always believed every lawsuit could be avoided if the parties just grew up, which is Emotional Intelligence, and addressed and resolved their conflicts.

Scott started his own private dual practices in 2001: Scott Warrick’s Human Resource Consulting, Coaching & Training Services (www.scottwarrick.com) and Scott Warrick’s Employment Law Services (www.scottwarrickemploymentlaw.com).

Today, Scott focuses most of his attention on working with clients to build their levels of Emotional Intelligence, which is vital to leadership skills, and to help them better resolve their conflicts, which means using the system he developed called EPR, which stands for Empathic Listening, Parroting, and “Rewards.”

Scott’s book, “Solve Employee Problems Before They Start:  Resolving Conflict in the Real World”  was written to help people do just that and make their lives better.

Today, Scott’s lives in Reynoldsburg, Ohio. He was been married to his wife Lisa for the last 32 years. They have two sons, Michael, who is in graduate school studying for his Master’s degree in Psychology at Roosevelt University in Chicago, and Nicholas, who is studying to become a Physical Therapist at The Ohio State University.

Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @ScottWarrick to get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow – Click to Tweet

“If you can not address and resolve conflict in your life you are never going to be happy.” – Click to Tweet

“You will never go anywhere in your career if you don’t address and resolve conflict.” – Click to Tweet

“Customer service is easy as long as everything goes well.” – Click to Tweet

“The hardest thing you’ll ever do in this world is to control yourself.” – Click to Tweet

“Once you understand the brain you understand why you and I do the dumb things we do.” – Click to Tweet

“We are wired to get divorced and fired.” – Click to Tweet

“We have a brain that is wired for fight or flight.” – Click to Tweet

“Five seconds is the difference between success and failure.” – Click to Tweet

“We have developed an attack style mentality that we think everybody has a negative intent.” – Click to Tweet

“If somebody is really upset it means that their brain is flooding with adrenaline and cortisol.” – Click to Tweet

“We lose our short-term memory because we treat our brains like soccer balls.” – Click to Tweet

“Other people are allowed to have their opinions.” – Click to Tweet

“A human can turn on you in 17,000th of a second.” – Click to Tweet

“Your brain moves at 268 miles an hour; you can talk at 50.” – Click to Tweet

“There’s no such thing as a personality conflict.” – Click to Tweet

“You cannot have a relationship with someone that does not communicate.” – Click to Tweet

“There’s never going to be a replacement for talking to people.” – Click to Tweet

“Take care of your brain, you’re going to be so much better.” – Click to Tweet

Hump to Get Over

Scott Warrick had a client that all of a sudden stopped communicating with him. After several attempts to connect without response, Scott learned he said something that offended someone during a workshop. After losing a lot of sleep, he resolved himself to the fact that he needed to take care of himself to move forward.

Advice for others

Everything is Emotional Intelligence. It’s first base.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

The constant struggle to remain sane.

Best Leadership Advice

There’s never going to be a replacement for talking to people.

Best tools in business or life

I’m able to relax when I need to relax.

Recommended Reading

Solve Employee Problems Before They Start: Resolving Conflict in the Real World

Daniel Goleman Books

Contacting Scott Warrick

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/scottwarrickconsulting

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ScottWarrick

Website: https://scottwarrick.com/

Resources and Show Mentions

146: Steven Stein: I can fade out a bit

Call Center Coach

An Even Better Place to Work

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

249: Scott Warrick: Resolving employee conflict is simple

Jim Rembach: : (00:00)

Okay. Fast leader Legion today. I’m excited because I have somebody on the show today who may I share several passions and can really help us understand some of the basic and core fundamentals about us as human beings and how we can actually become better in the workplace and live. Scott Warrick was born and raised in Newark, Ohio. His father was a machine operator at Kaiser aluminum and his mother was a secretary. He was a perfectly placed middle child with a sister three years older than him. Pam and Kelly are brother three years younger than Kelly. Passed away suddenly in January of 2018 at the age of 53 Kelly was one of Scott’s closest and dearest friends. Scott paid for his own undergraduate degree by working at Owens Corning fiberglass making ceiling tile and packaging glass wall. That was the first union that Scott was part of. He was part of the GBA, the glass bottle blowers association.

 

Jim Rembach: : (00:56)

Scott went on to work several jobs while carrying a full load of classes at the Ohio state university in 1983 he earned his undergraduate degree in organizational communication. This is the degree Scott uses the most today than all the others. Resolving conflict is always the key. Scott. Ben started his career in human resources by holding a dual role at the Kirby backing cleaner company. He was their director of human resources by day and a vacuum cleaner salesman by night and weekends, so earn money to earn money for his graduate degree. He worked in another factory, Kaiser aluminum. That was the second union. Scott joined the steel workers. Scott then graduated from the Ohio state university in 86 with his masters of labor and human resources degree. Scott then work in human resources and various organizations throughout the later 1980s at that time, the law was swallowing HR, so while he was working as the director of human resources at first investment company in Columbus, Ohio, he was accepted at capital university college of law in 1992 and Scott graduated from capital in 96 as the class valedictorian first out of two 33 Scott then practice traditional law from 96 to 98 and absolutely hated it.

 

Jim Rembach: : (02:09)

Scott always believed that the lawsuit could be avoided if the parties just grew up, which is emotional intelligence and addressed and resolve their conflicts. Scott started his own private dual practice in 2001 Scott Warrick’s, human resource consulting, coaching and training services and Scott works employment law services today Scott focuses most of his attention on working with clients to build their levels of emotional intelligence, which is bottled to leadership skills and to help them better resolve their conflicts, which means using the system he developed called E P. R, which stands for empathetic listening, parroting and rewards. Scott’s book solve employee problems before they start resolving conflict in the real world was written to help people do just that and make their lives better. Today, Scott Scott lives in Reynolds, Burt, Ohio. He was married to his wife. He’s been married to his wife, Lisa for 32 years and they have two sons, Michael, who is in graduate school studying for his master’s degree in psychology at Roosevelt university in Chicago and Nicholas, who is studying to become a physical therapist and are at the Ohio state university. Scott work. Are you ready to help us get over the hump? Oh yeah. Looking forward to it. I’ll set, you know, I’m glad you’re here but I’ve given my Legion a little bit about you and, but can you tell us what your current passion is so that we can get to know you even better?

 

Scott Warrick:: (03:27)

I’ve got a very unusual practice. Okay. First of all, I start from the premise. Uh, there is never a reason to go to court. Okay. And I will tell you right now, I’ve been practicing law for almost 25 years. I have never seen anybody who went to court that was glad they did it. Okay. People go to court and it’s really funny. People get all mad and everything. Uh, that’s wonderful. And then the bills start coming in. Okay. I’ll tell you, resolving conflict is make it really clear. If you cannot address and resolve conflict in your life, you are never going to be happy. You will probably get divorced. Number one cause of divorce is what I just told you right there. Number one, not addressing conflict, which we’ll talk about more. You’re going to get a union, you’re going to get sued. I nothing works if you can’t address and resolve conflict.

 

Scott Warrick:: (04:23)

And I will tell you right now, that is my passion that I, I go in and I train people. I love it when people, it’s really funny. Somebody read the book and I got a call from them and this is the most rewarding part of my day. I got this email from somebody, said she loved the book. She said, if Shida had this book five years ago, she’d still be married. And I’m like, I know, I know. It, it, it is very simple principles, but this is, you will never go anywhere in your career if you don’t address and resolve conflict. That’s my passion.

 

Jim Rembach: : (04:57)

Well, and I appreciate you sharing that and you and I share a couple couple things. Well, several of them are quite frankly, um, our love of baseball. Uh, we’re also both certified by MHS out of Canada and their EQI 2.0 system. I’ve also had Dr. Steven Stein, uh, who is the president of MHS on the show. And when I started thinking about this whole issue that you’re referring to, I mean it’s so much revolves around the whole self-discovery element. Cause a lot of times in conflict we’re pointing our fingers outward. And you know how the old saying goes when you do that, there’s three pointing back at you. Right? And that is true. It is so true. And through the book though, I mean there’s several different elements I that I want us to talk about and I want to make sure we get them, get through them all. But you at the very beginning you talk about customer services, employee relations, and vice versa. Kind of tell us what you mean about that.

 

Scott Warrick:: (05:50)

This is a big part of my practice because most people are in a company that I go into and it’s really because customer service is really pretty easy as long as everything goes well. Employee relations is a piece of cake. As long as everything goes well and that theory holds up well. If you start work at eight o’clock that holds up well until about eight Oh two okay. And here’s my premise and this is, and I’ll tell you, I love, we’ve talked a little bit about this and you’re going to, if you read the book, you get double doses of neurology. I can’t look at somebody and talk to them without looking at their forehead and their brain and wonder what’s going on up there. Okay? Um, and I’ll tell you it, when there’s conflict, you got an upset customer, right? They come in, they’re mad, okay?

 

Scott Warrick:: (06:42)

There is no difference between the conflict resolution, low resolution skills. And when I say, well, use this term later, verbal Jeet, verbal G is the term I came up with because I’m a towering five foot seven. I’m a monster, okay? I was actually this size in a junior high and everything, which why I made a good catcher, okay? Big and everything. But then I stopped growing. Everybody else got bigger. So, uh, if you cannot control yourself now to, I’m very sympathetic. Hardest thing you’ll ever do in this world is control yourself. And I have illegal windows in my car. They are illegal. They are too dark. I paid $185 fine every time I get pulled over. But I’m telling you, we all lose it. It’s better control. Okay, so got it. If you can control yourself, that’s emotional intelligence. Second is you got to resolve conflict.

 

Scott Warrick:: (07:40)

If you are ever in a conflict, you use those skills. You talked about E P R and Catholic listening, parenting and rewards. Those two together are verbal G. and if you’ve ever studied martial arts, which I have because I’m such a big guy, um, and that is resolving conflict. Now you give me a conflict with a customer. They’re the exact same skills. You have a conflict with an employee. They’re the exact same skills. So I get calls, it’s really funny. I’m doing customer service training next week and then I got a couple of resolving conflict in the workplace. Then we, after that, I got a call from a client saying, Hey, I know you do this conflict stuff with employees, but do you do something with customer service? So I just changed the title.

 

Jim Rembach: : (08:29)

It’s very true. And so for us, no. Um, and so let’s kind of go through that from a journey that we talked about, you know, self and inward looking, realization, actualization, all those things about self. Because the things is, well, we can work. We’re going to have a very, very difficult time being able to engage in any type of conflict. Uh, if we, we haven’t really done that work. Uh, and then also when you start talking about engaging in conflict, I think that’s where we see oftentimes people just Stonewall and you talk about that. It’s like, Hey, I don’t know how to do that. I don’t like that. It’s uncomfortable to me, so therefore I’m just gonna be quiet, shut down and just avoid it. And we can’t do that. Um, and that, that’s causing even more problems. And so it’s a magnifying effect that’s occurring.

 

Jim Rembach: : (09:13)

But we won’t go into that. And that’s a whole nother episode. I agree with that 1000%. So let’s talk about the [inaudible] in the book. You really hit and explain really well, uh, the neurology of EQs. And I think you and I even started talking about that. I see. I said, even yesterday, I had a hiccup, you know, in my neurology of EEQ because quite frankly, if I stop and dissect it, I did it myself. You know, I drank too much coffee. I didn’t get enough sleep for two days in a row. I mean, there’s several factors that came into play that I tried to tell a joke in it. And it was, it was backfired. It was stupid. Um, you know, and I offended somebody. It was like, you know, and I, I did, you know, I fell off my horse. Right. But if you can’t talk to us about the neurology of VQ and why it’s so important here.

 

Scott Warrick:: (10:00)

Yeah. Oh, it’s everything. And it’s really funny because I’m doing a full day session on the brain and let me tell you, I am obsessed with the brain because once you understand the brain, you understand why you and I do the dumb things we do. And let me just start off with this discussion. Humans, the saddest animal on the planet. All right? We’re the only animal that knows we’re going to die. The only one. So we’re the only ones who have the frontal lobes to worry about retirement. Okay? My cat, my cats, I have four cats and two dogs. That’s for therapy, okay. Uh, they don’t worry about anything, you know, then when we’re done in it. So first of all, we worry about things, okay? But we pride ourselves on our frontal lobes. We are wired to get divorced and fired. So they think about this, you and I now, and I’ll tell you this, I have to be very careful here because I took off people from the Bible bell, okay?

 

Scott Warrick:: (11:02)

Who are creationists and I get really nasty letter and I get death threats. I think that people take off their, what would Jesus do? And send me a death threat from the library cause I can’t track it, but please listen closely. What I’m saying, we have not evolved in 5,000 years. Now, creationists agree with this because they think the world is 5,600 years old. I have dear friends who are creationists, okay? And I don’t want to offend anybody, but let me tell you, if you’re a creationist, do you believe that the world is 5,600 years old? So 5,000 years ago, Fred Flintstone lived right here in Columbus, Ohio where I am right now. Okay? Uh, if you are an evolutionist and evolutionary theory, very clear man stopped evolving 10 to 50,000 years ago. So guess what? Everybody’s in agreement 5,000 years ago now, really get this, you and I live here, uh, out in the woods.

 

Scott Warrick:: (12:04)

Now we’re bigger and faster and stronger now, but that’s because of nutrition. Things like this. But really think about this. 5,000 years ago, 30% of everybody you and I know will have either been eaten by a wild animal or killed by another human. Yeah. Think about this. We got a brain that was wired, is wired for fight or flight. You and I are not wired to take the middle road. You and I are wired to run away or to attack all communication theory. Whether you look at crucial conversations, whether you look at [inaudible], whatever, okay? They’re all based on fight or flight. I use the terms retreat or an attacker, but it’s all the same. It’s what I studied back in the 80s with Ohio state. So you and I are wired for this now our emotional system, which is basically our amygdalas thinking of recent, this is two 1992 is when we discovered Dr. Joseph LeDoux discovered our amygdalas amazing in 17 thousands of a second.

 

Scott Warrick:: (13:16)

Our emotions kick it, and I like to put this in real world terms like you and I standing outside in the summer, we’ve all been bitten by mosquito. We turn and we smack the mosquito before cognitively we even know what happened. Our frontal lobes, our logical brain, two or three times at least slower than our emotional system. And if you’ve ever seen somebody just lose it and then they say, I don’t know what came over me. Well human came over you. Okay? So the vast majority of us, and when you understand the workings of the human brain, you understand that if you and I were wired to logically reason things out, deal with problems and our emotions would kick in later, all those people were eating that they didn’t live. Okay? Cause you and I’d be standing there and we’d see a lion. We take off, our ancestors took off there.

 

Scott Warrick:: (14:19)

We have some ancestors that would say, huh, what, what he’s going to do? And it’s too late. Okay. So really thank God for the slow witted. You know, humans, I’ll tell you, the people who survived are the ones who react first and think later worked great 5,000 years ago. It is net right there. Number one cause of divorce. That right there is each cue. You cannot separate brain health and understanding the brain and EEQ. That’s why I tell in the book and all my patients, all my clients, um, I’ll tell you, here’s a rule you got to follow. Five seconds is the difference between success and failure. I mean, you want to play a game, I’ll play a game. I’m gonna play a game. This is fun. I love this. Let’s do it. Okay. I’m going to give you a word to say. The word is joke. Now you and I are going to say this word together 10 times. Then I’m going to ask you a question. You give me an answer to what you’re saying. Okay, so all set. Let’s do it. Ready? Ready. The words joke. Joke, joke. Joke. You say it with me. Okay, here we go. Okay. Alright, ready? Go. Joe. Joe, Joe, Joe. Joe. What do you call the white part of the egg yolk? No, no, no, no jam.

 

Scott Warrick:: (15:40)

Here we go. Everybody falls for that. I really wanted to say, yo, everybody listening to this wants to say, Oh, it’s egg shell. A farmer’s. Call it all the human. Okay. So that’s how we’re wired. And the thing is, you’re a Miguel. Let’s have a memory system of their own subconscious, part of your subconscious. And so this gets into, if you don’t slow down in sync, I always love this people, they don’t slow down and think, and some star, someone famous, uh, is going to let loose before the end of this month. Racial slurs under floors, a religious slurs, something it’s going to ruin their career and people, Whoa. Where did that come from? It came from your Nicholas.

 

Jim Rembach: : (16:26)

Sure. Yeah. Let’s see, what did you say in that? I think we, we’ve gotten, unfortunately, I think sometimes it depends. Well, I think the pendulum swung too far is that we, we’ve lost compassion, um, or people actually being human and, which is to me is just a little bit of form of irony. I mean, yeah. You know, there’s a friend of mine who I had on the show, some of the beginning stages of, of the fast leader show, and there’s one thing that he said that always sticks with me. He says that, Hey, look, people, you know, no babies died here.

 

Scott Warrick:: (16:58)

Yeah,

 

Jim Rembach: : (17:00)

you’re, you’re overblowing things. And it’s like, it’s true. I mean, yeah. Okay. So your feelings, you know, we’re, we’re hurt. Right. You know, you were offended, but that goes back to the emotional intelligence thing and you talked about the whole, you know, they took off their, you know, what would Jesus do bands in order to be able to attack you? Uh, it’s like, look, you know, this whole inclusion issue, a diversity issue, um, I, I hate to say it, but it’s both sides that are not using their emotional intelligence.

 

Scott Warrick:: (17:28)

Oh, I have every right. And I agree with you saying 100% the difference between success and failure for both sides, it’s five seconds. You think five seconds you will know that yolks are yellow. Okay. And so exactly like you’re saying, we have developed a society that has cell phones. Okay. I mean, I’ve done dumb things in my life. We all have. But the difference today is that if you do something, someone’s going to record it and it might ruin you. And what you’re saying right there is we have taken on a mentality that says, I should never be offended. Let me tell you. United States Supreme court made this very clear in 1993 Harris vs forklift systems, great case to read. Uh, you are going to be offended. You’re going to be offended when you leave the house. You know, there was actually great, great example of this on if you ever watched duck dynasty, Neil Robinson, okay.

 

Scott Warrick:: (18:28)

Lives out in the by you and everything and ms Kay wanted to move into a multimillion dollar neighborhood and everything and he said, you know, you miss Kay can do whatever she wants to do. I just want to be able to go and whenever I want, just pee off my front porch. Well I don’t care how much money you got. Okay. People going to be offended and that is rightfully so you, you can’t do whatever you want to do on your front porch. You can’t do whatever you want to do cause you’re going to be offended. And we, we have developed, and I’ve got this in my next book that I’m working on because it gets into trust and things like this. We have developed an attack style of mentality that we think that everybody has a negative intent and they don’t. We attack people and I don’t know if you Google the Missouri Mizzou communications professor who literally attacked a young Asian photographer for taking pictures at a rally and she thought, she calls me, she needs a muscle over here. I’m like, wait a minute. You’re assuming right away because this tells me how you think this is how you’re primed and this how you project onto the world. Which honestly I think you might need to be assessed. Okay. But you seem to think because somebody’s offended you that they had negative intent and that now you’re going to attack and you’ve got every right. No, most people have positive intent. This month I got accused of using a racial shorter because I talked about the old days when I was growing up and I showed a picture of monkey bars.

 

Scott Warrick:: (20:06)

I had an African American woman got really upset and she put on there that I was offensive should never be allowed back cause that’s a racial swore. And I’m like, honestly, I’ve never heard that one before. So you are absolutely right. We are developing an attack stock. And again, we’re human. And, and again, let me just make this fairly clear. I am dealing, I’m representing different people pro bono because they are being sexually harassed at work or racially harassed at work. Uh, and I’ll tell you, I’m not an employee, an employee or attorney or an employee E attorney. I represent people who I believe are right. That’s what I decide and that’s who I protect. But all these folks that got protections, I will tell you there are people that if you compliment somebody’s hair, Oh, you had negative intent or use the term monkey bars or something like this and they’ll find the George on, you know, you’re right. We’ve got to get some humanity, but we gotta stop and take that five seconds and think, do you think this person had negative intent or positive intent? And most people really have positive intent. They really do. Some people don’t, but most people do.

 

Jim Rembach: : (21:17)

Yeah, most definitely. Now I think with, with that, um, you talk about three styles of communication that kind of can, you know, give a lens into what you were talking about in regards to this reactionary, uh, you know, behavior that we have or you know, even going in stonewalling piece. Look, you can’t talk about those three styles.

 

Scott Warrick:: (21:36)

Yeah. And, and just picture a baseball diamond, cause honestly, 60% of the brain is visual. Okay. And I always love this one. I’m a visual learner. Why don’t you and 7 billion other people on the planet. Okay. Cause uh, which we’re all wired at the basic, the same. Okay. Uh, and I’ll tell you just for your listeners, go Google the human genome project. We’re all related. Now let’s leave it at that. That’s why we’re all wired the same. But fight or flight, okay. We are all hardwired to attack into retreat. And my stereotypical people that I use for this Simon cow, okay. Now I don’t know what he’s like in his personal life, but he has this stereotypical reputation for being an attack. Okay. Well, we all know people who are tell it like it is. I’m an honest person, a or you just have to understand, I feel very strongly about this, which gets back to the point you were making.

 

Scott Warrick:: (22:32)

If I feel strongly about this, I got a right to rip your head off. No. Okay. That will end very badly for you. Alright? And I will tell you, you attack a human, and I’ll tell you this stuff, you ever attack, if you, you’re taking your life into your hands. Human animal is why is seven times more likely to kill you and all other 1024 mammals on the planet? We are seven times more deadly than any other animal on the planet. We kill for form. Okay? So that’s our fight. Now, most people that you and I know, and I call them, those are the attackers. Most people that you know and I know are nice people. Their aunt B from the, the the Andy old Andy Griffith show. So all your gen liars and gen Z are probably gonna have to Google that or do some research on TD land.

 

Scott Warrick:: (23:30)

Okay? Oh, you just offended an entire group. I just picked on the gen Z years and they were not blessed with the Andy Griffith show like I was growing up, but she’s so nice. Oh, she’s so sweet. She bakes pies. She’s an evil heartbeat. Okay. Every time there’s a conflict, she’s a nice person. I’ll smile to your face and then at the same time, I will go sit with my own bitty friend, my old city friend, Clara at the kitchen table and talk about her behind her back. Okay. That’s what I call retreating. Those are the passive aggressive. Now I’m kind of half tongue and cheek, but