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054: Chip Bell: It landed and a miracle happened

Chip Bell Show Notes

Chip Bell’s unit was in an ambush site during the Vietnam War. As an officer, Chip usually went with the unit most likely to make contact with the enemy. One night, Chip’s unit was totally surrounded by an enemy unit that was ten times the size of his unit. As the enemy began to get closer to his unit, Chip called for artillery support. What happened next was of legend. Listen to Chip tell his story of getting over the hump and what it meant in his life.

Chip grew up on a cattle farm in South Georgia. His father was a full-time banker and a full-time farmer and his mother was a teacher.  Being the oldest in a family of three children Chip was strongly encouraged to take the lead, set the example, do more than his share, and always do the right thing.  This expectation gave him a strong drive to achieve, serve others, and pursue excellence in a fashion that reflected ethics and a keen sense of fair play.

Chip has had a wealth of life experiences from being tested in the heat of intense military combat as an infantry unit commander in Viet Nam with the elite 82nd Airborne, to being a small unit (guerrilla) tactics instructor at the Army Infantry School, to opening for Back Street Boys.

The values that influence Chip (and the ones he strives to pursue) include Integrity, partnership, honesty, reliability, and a strong dedication to excellence.  Chip seeks to be a role model for wholesome relationships grounded in ethics with an obvious zeal to do whatever it takes to yield positive, productive results.

The legacy Chip wants to leave behind is that he made a difference in the lives of others—both personally and professionally.  His work, focuses on creating the kind of experiences for customers that build loyalty and advocacy.  That includes helping leaders of organizations create a culture that supports those serving customers and to find creative solutions to most challenges, rather than settling for the typical logical ones.

Chip’s most treasured avocation (and vocation) is professional writing—an outlet that has yielded 21 books, which he claims is more than he has read. His other passion is keynote speaking—a role that enables me to positively influence hundreds of leaders at the same time.

Chip is a very happy person and feels he’s extremely fortunate to have been given a successful career filled with adventure, challenge, learning, and success.

Chip currently lives on the shores of beautiful Lake Oconee with his wife of 50 years Dr. Nancy Bell, where they try to spend as much time as possible with their three beautiful granddaughters.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @ChipRBell and get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“There’s no limit to ingenuity.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet

“(Organizational) cultures are not rational, they’re emotional” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“If we’re leading an organization of computers, we wouldn’t have to worry about morale.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“The human side of business operates with a different logic than machines.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Organizations that are consistently great…have found a way to instill passion.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“How do we keep helping people tie their work to a grander mission?” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Helping people find…connection of meaning in what you do can make all the difference.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Leaders help people see what matters in what they do.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Too many leaders think they are just there to get the work done.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“How we help people feel valued…is a path to, my life matters.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Your attitude towards life is something you choose.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“The attitude you bring…is what you pass on to employees.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“I choose a great attitude.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“If you can’t manage yourself, obviously you can’t manage others.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Your job is to take responsibility and to be a role model.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“No matter how frightened you may be, it’s not going to win the day.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“Every day is a chance to achieve something new.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“It’s not about me, it’s about the contribution.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“I prioritize by, will this make a difference in the life of people I influence?” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

“The next day you get a new opportunity to right whatever mistake you’ve made.” -Chip Bell Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Chip Bell’s unit was in an ambush site during the Vietnam War. As an officer, Chip usually went with the unit most likely to make contact with the enemy. One night, Chip’s unit was totally surrounded by an enemy unit that was ten times the size of his unit. As the enemy began to get closer to his unit, Chip called for artillery support. What happened next was of legend. Listen to Chip tell his story of getting over the hump and what it meant in his life.

Advice for others

It’s all about giving back and making a difference in the life of others.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

Not enough time in the day.

Best Leadership Advice Received

Be authentic.

Secret to Success

Jack Daniel’s Whiskey.

Best tools that helps in business or Life

I think I am a creative person and that helps me a lot.

Recommended Reading

Holy Bible: New Living Translation

Contacting Chip

Website: http://www.chipbell.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chiprbell

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ChipRBell

Resources

How are you raising customer expectations too high?Interview with Chip at CCExpo

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

Show Transcript: 

[expand title=”Click to access edited transcript”]

054: Chip Bell: It landed and a miracle happened

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we uncover the leadership like hat that help you to experience, break out performance faster and rocket to success. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

“Developing your contact center agents using surveys are what monkeys do. Elevate your ROI and BOC by building integrity and agent engage mode to survey calibration process only available in the award winning in the External Quality Monitoring program from Customer Relationship Metrics. Move onward and upward by going to www.customergradeacall.com/fast and getting your $7,500 rapid results package for free.”

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay , Fast Leader Legion, I am excited today because we’re going to get the opportunity to have a show with one of the most dynamic keynote speakers that I have had the opportunity to see in the past couple years. Chip Bell grew up on a cattle farm in South Georgia. His father was a full-time baker and a full-time farmer and his mother was a teacher.  Being the oldest in the family of three children Chip was strongly encouraged to take the lead, set the example, do more than his share and always do the right thing. This expectation gave him a strong drive to achieve, certain others, and pursue excellence in a fashion that reflected ethics and a keen sense of fair play. 

 

Chip has had a wealth of life experiences from being tested in the heat of intense military combat as an Infantry Unit Commander in Vietnam with the Elite 82nd Airborne to being a small guerrilla Tactics Instructor at the Army infantry school and opening up for the Backstreet Boys. Chips most treasured avocation and vocation is professional writing and outlet that has yielded 21 books which he claims is more than he’s ever read. His other passion is keynote speaking, a role that enables him to positively influence hundreds of leaders at the same time. Chip currently resides on the shores of beautiful Lake Oconee with his wife of 50 years Dr. Nancy Bell, were they try to spend as much time possible with their three beautiful granddaughters. Chip Bell, are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Chip Bell:    I am ready. Just bring them to me, this is so much fun, thank you Jim.

 

Jim Rembach:    I’m glad to have you. Now I’ve given our legion a little bit about you but can you tell us what your current passion is so that we can get to know you even better. 

 

Chip Bell:    Sure. My current passion more than anything else helping organizations with innovative service the kind of service that is what I call value-unique not just value added. I think you think about value added as being taking what customers expects and adding more. The challenge with that is—first of all we pretty quickly can ran out of room. There’s obviously a  limit to our generosity but I think there’s no limit to ingenuity and value-unique expand in that unique, simple, unexpected, surprise you can provide customers that not only delivers the kind of good experience they want but one that is so unique that they are eager to tell other people to be advocates for your organization. 

 

Jim Rembach:    You know Chip there’s so much competition in what we’re talking about and I often find that we try to get those if were in an organization or leading in a way that is [3:05 inaudible] we create incentives, we create performance management systems and we try to drive to a certain level of engagement in a manner by which is very mechanical and doesn’t have a whole lot of inspiration and uniqueness and innovation associated with it. When you start talking about that and helping others do some of those things that you’re talking, what are some of the barriers that you see preventing organizations from being able to execute?

 

Chip Bell:    To your point, Jim, I think so many times the organizations focus on the objective quantitative, arithmetic side of the business. Obviously their stakeholders care a lot about that and that’s important, but what we’re talking about is human being, human relationships and cultures. And cultures are not rational they’re emotional they’re not always linear and logical, sometimes they’re illogical, that’s the nature of human beings. I think the degree in which we balance that sense of the quantitative side with the qualitative side, the more we  balance the sense of arithmetic side with the anthropology side, if you will, of an organization more likely to create a spirit not just bottom line substance. And so, I think that’s one thing that an organizations often miss is if we were leading an organization of computers we wouldn’t have to worry so much about this, but we worry about morale, we worry about relationships, we worry about the sides of the business that are by definition human and I think that operates with a completely different logic than the logic of machines, the logic of numbers, the logic of computers. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And thinking about where you’ve been and your life experiences and where you are today, I start thinking about so many things associated with the human condition and experiences. There’s a very different way of leading that is necessary when you’re under fire in the jungle versus being in an organization trying to get people to move towards a common goal. With all of those we have to find different ways that we become inspired, help to keep us grounded so that we do move in the right direction. And a lot of things we do on the show are associated around that, as well as we use quotes as a tool. Is there a quote or two that kind of stands out for you that kind of helps point you in the right direction that you can share with us?

 

Chip Bell:    Well, I think there’s a lot of quotes. But I think part of it is Aristotle’s comment when he talked about the pursuit of excellence being a habit, that’s one that stands out for me. And I think it is recognizing again that if you look at this organizations that are consistently great, that are renowned overtime, not just one moment in the sun but have a long legacy of excellence in the marketplace, you find they have found a way to instill passion and excitement and enthusiasm among the people who work for that organization. And I think tying it back to the military example that you used, part of the difference between leading a Ranger unit, for example that I have work luckily to lead, and just what you might say the everyday ordinary drafted soldier. Those people who were in Ranger units felt a sense of mission, sense of purpose they saw it as almost a calling and they were there not only for purpose that mattered to them that was important to them, take away the political side whether the particular war was favorable or not, the fact that they were there for their buddies for their unit to be seen as an excellent unit in the eyes of others, all of those things propel them to greatness and to demonstrate great courage and to take risk they might otherwise not take. If we look at a lot of the research Dan Peake has done for example, when he talks about do incentive systems work? What is it really motivates people? It comes back to a sense of purpose, that had sense of grounding and calling that’s important for them. A sense of growth is just something that’s going to be an opportunity for me to learn and increase my competence and knowledge. And I think those are two critical aspects in any culture is, how do we keep helping people tie their work to a grander purpose to a grander mission? We’ve all heard that famous quote of, “What are doing on land bricks? What are you doing? I’m doing a cathedral.” And the motivation of the worker who sees a role as cathedral building not just brick laying creates a different commitment, zeal, and passion for what they do. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks for sharing that. As you’re talking there’s something that kind of stood out to me that has been my toolbox to some degree, as well as in my dialogue, as well as in my framing is the word called, ‘mindset.’ A lot of people may push back and say, “Well, it’s just semantics.” Really? Like you were saying, “Do I use the words I’m laying bricks or do I use the words that I’m building a cathedral?” Because they’re going to plant very different things in somebody’s mind, that’s trivializing it, it could be something massive that causes somebody to have a totally different feeling and engagement that comes from inside, not that you’re trying to coerce.

 

Chip Bell:    Exactly. Well, we all probably grew up reading Viktor Frankl and some of the great work. One of his great book was, Man’s Search for Meaning, I always remember him telling the story of being in the concentration camp in Germany. He’s a psychologist, philosopher and he was deeply interested in what were the things that made a difference in terms of those who survived the concentration camp and those who didn’t? And he found that it had nothing to do with whether they were physically strong or not, it had nothing to do with whether or not they were scrappy and clever in getting what they needed, it all had to do with whether or not they had purpose and whether they were looking and saw life and saw themselves in being in control of their environment.

 

Eleanor Roosevelt always said, “No one makes you inferior without your permission.” And so in many ways helping people find that important connection of that meaning in what you do, and value in what you do and can make all the difference in terms of, again their commitment, but it’s also that sense of joy in what I do. What I do every day matters. And probably the role of leaders is help people see what matters about what we do. Why they’re important? And how they’re valued in the quest for excellence in whatever they do. Too many leaders think they’re there and just get the work done you started with, we’re talking about systems, systems performance. I think it’s also encouragement and affirmation and coaching and those things that may not be as easily quantifiable. William James, great psychologist said, “Deepest craving of human nature is the need to be valued.” And so how we as leaders help people feel valued? And that again that connection with purpose is one of the path to my life matters, what I do matters, I matter.  

 

Jim Rembach:    I sure value you Chip, for the things that you do and for being on the show. Again thinking about where you are today and what you’ve been through and the life experience that you had and the way that you grew up on the farm and the whole work ethic and all of those things, those don’t come easy. We have to get over a lot of humps in order to be able to either live by those or sometimes not and then get back on that horse or that camel, so to speak. We have humps that we have to get over and they make us, and define us and help us set us, sometimes in wrong direction but there are things that all of us have learned from and can learn from. Do you have a time where you can remember you have to get over the hump and it was a defining moment for you, can you share that with us?

 

Chip Bell:    I do. And I don’t want to be particularly graphic but one of the defining moment in my life that I was blessed to have, although it scared the hell out of me, because I thought this is in. When I was in the military my unit was in an ambush site and as an officer I usually went with the unit most likely that they contact or the one I consider to be the weakest. Ambush might be seven or eight people and you’re in a location and you’re there to engage the enemy in the night and so usually you’re in a position of stealth the enemy might know that you are in that area but not precisely where you are. In about to the middle of the night we came under fire from a unit about 10 times our size, let’s say there were eight of us, they’re probably a 100 NDA soldiers and they were all lined up across a big open area and they knew we were in that area and they will continue until they swept over us. Obviously you’re out numbered 10/1 your chances are remote that you live through that and you knew that if they continue to proceed sweeping the area they’d stumble upon you pretty quickly. 

 

And so I started calling an artillery on my own position behind them and walking it in hoping that I would walk that artillery, it’s a great big 105mm howitzers that are firing at us 2 or 3 miles away, and hopefully it would catch up with them before they discover us, obviously you never return fire because it gives away your position. I started working our artillery and I reach the point in that process where it’s getting closer and closer where we’re beginning to catch some of the shrapnel from the artillery, now it’s getting close, and there’s a call that you make where you ask drop to five and that means drop that thing 25 meters closer to where you know we’re  supposed to be and they call back is confirmed danger very close and the requirement on the part of the officer who’s calling in that to say, “Roger, all my part” which means I am giving you authorization to put that next round right where we are. And so you can hear it coming in the distance and you have a chance to tell everybody in that fight, this is it It’s coming towards us the hope is it takes us out along with the enemy because we could see their silhouette, it’s that close. 

 

And so it landed, a miracle happened, it took the enemy out but no one in my unit got a scratch. There has some strange things that happened, one individual had their pants legs shredded by the shrapnel but it didn’t touch their flesh. I had another person who had the stock of the weapon taken out but he was holding the upper end of his rifle, so it didn’t touch him. Another person had their helmet pierced by big piece of shrapnel but he decided the last minute to take his steel [15:06 inaudible]and not be wearing it and obviously we’re laying palm on the ground, no one got a scratch we were supposed to have been taken out. Of course, we couldn’t here for about 2 to 3 days from the sound concussion and other things but the hearing does eventually come back. But I walked away from that experience I was supposed to go on with that and I didn’t, and so I will have a great day every day the rest of my life is going to be an awesome day it’s turned out that way because I think your attitude towards life is something you choose. The great actor Michael Jeffry says, “The only disability in life is a poor attitude.” So it’s the attitude that you have, the attitude that you bring. I got blessed when I was growing up a parents who have a very upbeat, positive, you can do anything kind of attitude. I think it’s the same attitude that pass on to our employees, that upbeat, be optimistic, positive, you can do anything kind of attitude and it’s very contagious in how it’s done. So, I think that particular instance in Vietnam in 1969 probably was an important turning point in my life, it’s one of the significant emotional experiences that shapes how you view your life but also it shapes how you’re going to live every day. So, every morning I get up and it’s a great day, there’s going to be a great day. I have things thrown my way but I choose my attitude and I choose the right attitude. I think that’s one big moment in my life. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s huge for anybody, thanks so much for sharing it and I wish we had more time to go into all the details because I’m sure that in itself—I can’t even imagine, many of us can imagine being able to go through that and knowing that you made your own call to have friendly fire, that’s amazing.

 

Chip Bell:    When you’re responsible that’s what you do. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s a great point, standing up and doing what we need to do and leading from upfront and trying to get movement, trying to have an organization reach its goals is that we have to be willing to not just take the shots but call the shots to come to us.

 

Chip Bell:    Absolutely. That’s your job, that’s your responsibility, that’s your calling. It’s not that I was there to be a hero or there to get some medal or there to do something grand or glorious, I was doing my job because I was responsible for that unit and I was responsible for a mission that matter, and so that’s what you do. And I was fortunate in the fact that I had great training in the military of how to be an infantry officer and so I credit that great training. And you’re taught how to respond under fire, you’re taught how to make decisions when everything around you looks like it’s coming to an end. You taught how to manage yourself through that and if you can’t manage yourself obviously you can’t manage others around you. So was I scared? Absolutely I was scared. Did you think this is going to be it? Absolutely. But your job is there to take your responsibility and to be a role model for those around you in terms of the courage you exhibit. Is it being frightened? No matter how frightened you may be it’s not going to win to that it’s going forward even though it feels difficult and impossible, you’ll find a way. You aren’t given more than you could handle.

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s another great point. And I know that for you getting opportunity to learn more about you is that you have a lot of things going on your plate and you’ve done a lot of things—yeah, but you also have a lot of things going, you’re not slowing down. So, when you get up in the morning you’re not only saying I’m going to have a great day it’s I’m going to have a lot of things to do in this great day, it’s not sitting back.

 

Chip Bell:    Absolutely.  The worst thing I can imagine is a day with nothing to do, that sounds boring, and you don’t learn anything from that. So, every day is a chance to learn something new and to achieve something new. So, to me it is a gift not an albatross at all. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I know that you have a lot of things on your plate and so when you start thinking about goals, what are some of the goals you have?

 

Chip Bell:    My ultimate purpose is to make a difference and so the work I do every day is oriented toward that end. When I make decisions and decide on priorities every day, when I realize I’ve got 12 task I’ve got to get done but I only have time for 7 or 8, how I make decisions about the priority of where am I going to put the biggest attention and try to make smart about time management is we’d just going to make the biggest impact on the lives of the people that I influence, it is the number one criteria, it’s not about me it’s about the contribution, that’s important. And the way in which I try to go about it is with the sense of joy, with the sense of enthusiasm and excitement, but the choices are all about—will this matter? Will this make a difference? Will this change those people that I influence? So, that’s how I make decisions. Sometimes I’m wrong, sometimes I make the wrong decision, but the next day you got a new opportunity. A new opportunity to right whatever mistake you make and go forward and not be pulled down by. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader Legion wished you the very best. Before we move on let’s get a quick word from our sponsor.

 

How do you get higher contact center agent performance? It’s when customers grade the call and the ratings and comments are used to motivate and coach agents. Uncover hidden secrets and replicate your best agents with the real-time insights from the award-winning External Quality Monitoring program Customer Relationship Metrics. Move onward and upward by going to customersgradethecall.com/fast and getting a $7500 rapid result package for free.

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright, here we go now Fast Leader listeners, it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Chip the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster, Chip Bell are you ready to hoedown?

 

Chip Bell:    Absolutely. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright. What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today?

 

Chip Bell:    Not enough time in the day.

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you have ever received? 

 

Chip Bell:    Be authentic. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success?

 

Chip Bell:    Jack Daniels whiskey.

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of your best tools that helps you lead in business or life? 

 

Chip Bell:    I think I’m a creative person and that helps me a lot. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book that you’d recommend to our listeners, it could be from any genre? 

 

Chip Bell:    I think the Bible. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader Legion you can find links to that and other bonus information from today’s show by going to fastleader.net/Chip Bell. And the Bible and we’re going to give you a link to, is going to be from one of Chip’s favorite version, so we’re going to get the information from him. Okay, Chip this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you have been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, what piece of skill or knowledge would you take back with you and why?

 

Chip Bell:    I think my ability to mentor. And I would have used it more readily with people who were younger, newer and less experienced. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And I think we all should take that as something going forward that we should do. There’s always someone who could use some mentoring and we need to make ourselves available for doing just that.

 

Chip Bell:    That’s it, it’s all about giving back, it’s all about making the difference in another human beings life, that’s why we’re here. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Chip it was an honor to spend time with you today, can you please share with the Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you? 

 

Chip Bell:    It’s easy, chipbell.com, it’s the name of the website I can remember. It will tell you all about what I do, and keynotes I give and books I’ve written, and it’s also a way for you to say things that are important to my life, like my family. I even got a section—photographs of family, grandchildren and so forth. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Chip Bell, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom, the Fast Leader legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the www.fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster. 

 

END OF AUDIO 

 

[/expand]

 

053: Eric Mondschein: I hung up the phone and I was livid

Eric Mondschein Show Notes

Eric Mondschein wanted to have students from the US and Canada learn international law by arguing a mock case at the United Nations. Needing to have a country sponsor him to accomplish this, Eric called the US Ambassador to the UN and was quickly dismissed. That’s when Eric did something that got him the sponsorship he wanted. Listen to Eric’s story and learn how to get over the hump to move onward and upward faster.

Eric was born in Flushing, NY, but his parents soon moved across the Hudson River to Rockland County where he grew up in the country in Monsey, NY and lived at 12 College Road and went to Suffern high School.

Eric has had a multifaceted and diverse professional career. After he obtained a masters degree in delinquency prevention he served as a floor supervisor in a maximum security detention center, and after receiving his doctorate in law and education he held several positions with the US government and taught law and education at the undergraduate and graduate levels of education at several colleges and universities.

Eric directed an award-winning, law-related education program for the New York State Bar Association from 1980 through 1994 and in 1993 he was the recipient of the American Bar association’s Isidore Starr award for exemplary achievement in law-related education.

Eric recently authored Life at 12 College Road, which is a collection of short stories about growing up in America in the 1950s and 1960s. He also recently co-authored a monograph and supplement, Sexual Harassment and Bullying: Similar But Not the Same, that explores the current legal developments concerning sexual harassment and bullying in K-12 education.

When Eric is not writing or consulting you can usually find him fishing or shooting at his home in the Adirondack Mountains of upstate New York, where he lives with his wife Ginny.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @EricSMondschein and get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“Many of us today understand who the bullies are where we work.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet

“Never in any of my definitions of leadership saw where it means leading from behind” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“To lead means being out in front; that also means taking risks.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“To be a leader doesn’t mean you’re better than those who follow.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“The most important key is trustworthiness.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“It’s the leader who takes the risk.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“We will do the best we can with what we have.” Jack Bogley quoted by Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“No matter what you do you have limited resources.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“If you focus on what you have you can make the most of it.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“If you focus on the things you don’t have you won’t accomplish anything.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“You can say no, but you don’t have to be dismissive.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“As a human being you can never say you’re done.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

“Don’t try to be someone you’re not, but be all the person that you are.” -Eric Mondschein Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Eric Mondschein wanted to have students from the US and Canada learn international law by arguing a mock case at the United Nations. Needing to have a country sponsor him to accomplish this, Eric called the US Ambassador to the UN and was quickly dismissed. That’s when Eric did something that got him the sponsorship he wanted. Listen to Eric’s story and learn how to get over the hump to move onward and upward faster.

Advice for others

Never take no for an answer.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

My biggest constraint is time.

Best Leadership Advice Received

Don’t try to be someone you’re not, but be all the person that you are.

Secret to Success

I have always taken no as a challenge.

Best tools that helps in business or Life

Being trustworthy. It is the most important foundation of a professional and personal life.

Recommended Reading

Questions of Character: Illuminating the Heart of Leadership Through Literature

Leading Quietly

Contacting Eric

Website: http://www.ericmondschein.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/eric-mondschein-06145311

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ericsmondschein

Resources

Life at 12 College Road

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

Show Transcript: 

[expand title=”Click to access edited transcript”]

053: Eric Mondschein: I hung up the phone and I was livid

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we uncover the leadership like hat that help you to experience, break out performance faster and rocket to success. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

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Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader Legion today I’m excited cause we get the opportunity to meet with somebody who is one leading experts in an area that impacts us all, Eric Mondschien was born in Flushing, New York but his parents soon moved across the Hudson River to Rockland County where he grew up in the country in Monsey, New York and lived at 12 College Road. Eric has had a multifaceted and diverse professional career after he obtained a Master’s degree in Delinquency Prevention, he served as a Floor Supervisor in a maximum-security detention center. After receiving his Doctorate in Law and Education he held several positions in the U.S. government and taught law and education at the undergraduate and graduate levels at several colleges and universities.

 

Eric directed an award-winning law related education program for the New York State Bar Association from 1980 to ‘94 and ‘93 he was the recipient of the American Bar Association’s Isidore Starr award for exemplary achievement in law related education. Eric recently authored Life at 12 College Road, which is a collection of short stories about growing up in America in the late 50’s and 60’s he also recently co-authored a monograph and supplement Sexual Harassment and Bullying: Similar but Not the same, that explores the current legal developments concerning sexual harassment and bullying in K-12 education. When Eric is not writing or consulting you can usually find him fishing or shooting at his home in Adirondack Mountains of upstate New York where he lives with his wife Jennie. Eric Mondschien, are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I am ready to go for that hump.

 

Jim Rembach:     I’ve given our legion a little bit about you, but can you share what your current passion is so that we can get to know you better?

 

Eric Mondschien:     My current passion, that’s a good question. I think I would say that since returning from Israel in 2006, my passion has been writing. And I began a website or blog where I share my opinions, commentary, rant if you will, on issues confronting all of us today as well as poetry and even recipes.

Jim Rembach:     I was excited for you to be on the show because you’ve been one of the leading experts for many years on one of things that affects us all. And it’s really this whole issue in regards to the things that we do to affect and impact others that could be so damaging as well as create some heinous bad habits that we see manifesting themselves out no in society today, and that’s violation of our fellow human being. And oftentimes we find that in the workplace it’s not like these things just create or get developed in the workplace they started at an early age.

 

Eric Mondschien:     Yes, they do. Actually some elementary school on up, my generation, your generation and those following us, many of us have just felt this was part of childhood this is what we got through whether it was being bullied or we were the bully, and that’s got to stop because it’s not okay and today’s society seems more prepared to confront it and not just accept it.  And so we see many efforts being done in schools, in the community, on television with children shows explaining that it’s not okay to be a bully and you don’t have to be bullied. And that’s something that even takes place in the workplace. Many of us today understand who the bullies are where we work and who were the bullied and it’s not okay. As a matter of fact in today’s society and at work it’s illegal and there are repercussions not only for the company but for the individuals involved.

 

Jim Rembach:     Even often times though when you start talking about that illegal piece, it doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s going to stop happening. There’s speed limit signs posted all over the place but I’m afraid I break that one quite often. And so when you start thinking about some of these things, they just are going to happen anyway. And goodness knows, the Internet has made and created a whole different level of bullying that we have never seen before.

 

Eric Mondschien:     And it has its own name we call it cyber bullying. And it’s terrific because now you can be the little skinny kid and yet with the anonymity of the Internet you can say and do things to other people that he would never dream of saying to their face. Unfortunately, many of the cyber bullies end up being girls and it’s something that has unfortunately, resulted in a number of suicides of young people. So it’s not just something that you can get over it, we’ve all been bullied, but now these now have been leading towards suicide of young people and that definitely now okay. 

 

Jim Rembach:     With the amount of experience, exposure, knowledge gained all of the things that we talk about what it means to become one of the leading experts in a certain area, if you were to say that society is headed in a particular direction, what direction would you say that it was heading to?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I wish you would asked me what direction I wish it was heading to. But if we’re going to deal with the direction we’re heading in now, I can’t be optimistic. I see a darkness an overshadowing, I see people in engulf in fear, anxiety and a lot of it has to do with our own leaders and the lack of leadership and I don’t want to get in to politics if you will, but I have never in any of my understandings or definitions of leadership saw where it means leading from behind. To lead means being out in front and that also means taking risks, sure you can have others lead that doesn’t mean you’re leading from behind it means you’ve delegated or asked others to lead. To be a leader doesn’t mean you’re better than those who follow, it means you just happen to be in the lead and people are going to follow you because they either trust you, which I think is the most important key—trustworthiness—or you all have a general mission but you may have a clear understanding which puts you in front. 

 

And something in the years that I spent living and working in Israel I found fascinating, because in Israel the officers in the Israeli army are known for thought saying, “Follow me “not you go first but follow me. It’s the leader who takes the risk, it’s the leader who gets people to follow them and that means being out in front. And so I guess going back to your general question I think there’s a, malaise in this country, there’s a fear, there’s an anxiety because we don’t know what to expect tomorrow. Where we used to have a clear understanding that tomorrow is always going to be better than today, I think now you have many people concerned that tomorrow may be worse than today. And that has to be changed by us, no one else can change for us.

 

Jim Rembach:     Now that’s so true, and thank you for sharing that.  I started thinking about as you are talking and one of the things that I’d I have through my own growth have come to the realization that when you think about leading that it can’t just be one person everybody has to step up. So many people have talked about servant leadership in serving others and being that one who’s in front and being that example but the fact is that we all have that responsibility. And so I talk about servant teamwork is that we all have to collaborate and work together and we all have to do what you’re talking about in order for us to move the mountain, and we can move. Some of this societal issues we can handle but we have to have a different mindset, it’s now one person that’s going to fix it we have to do it as a collective. 

 

In addition to that we also have to be aware that in order to ignite, change it’s not by using some of bullying tactics. What I often saw and find talking about the people who feel like they are wrong that there is an unjust, is that they do it in such a negative way that it turns toxic. So Eric I know with a lot of the things that you have going on, a lot of experiences that you have had, I can only imagine being a writer and with all of that, you probably had a lot of inspiration from different quotes, is there one or two that you can shared us that and can give us a little bit of booze to get over the hump?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I’d be happy. For me, it’s personal because this is a quote that I took from my wife’s uncle Jack Broglie, who was an Annapolis graduate and a submarine commander during World War II. What he said and he actually had is a plaque on his submarine and then on all the other ships that he commanded was, “We will do the best we can with what we have.” I took that to heart and I actually heard it from him when I was still going to college because I was married very young and I was in college, but from that moment on I look at that quote and after he passed I was honored that he bequeath not only that plaque, which was actually a silver plated plaque that he had in his Captain’s quarters,  “We will do the best we can with what we have” that and the Captain’s silver serving set that he bequeathed to me with name of the submarine. This is what he lived by and when you think it, no matter what you do, you have limited resources, you have limited people with whatever experience they bring to the table and if you understand how to work with them and how to push not only them and yourself but utilizing the full potential of whatever you have, you can accomplish anything and so it always stuck with me. 

 

Jim Rembach:     I think that’s a great point, thanks for sharing. I think so many times, I even have a 10, 12 and a 7 year old, at times is that they often start talking about can’t doing something because they don’t have, and I’m like, “You know what, stop focusing on that. Focus on what you do have and utilize that in order to be able to accomplish what you’re trying to accomplish. Stop thinking about what you don’t think about what you do.”

 

Eric Mondschien:     If you focus on what you have you can make the most of it, if you focus on things you don’t have you won’t accomplish anything. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Eric, I know that you’ve had just a wealth of experience in different countries and working with a lot of different leaders and even where you are today with writing and I know there had to be a lot humps that you’ve had to get over that it defined you and helped you be the person who you are today. Is there one that stands up for you that you can share with us so that we can learn?

 

Eric Mondschien:     Yes, and I really like the question. There are many different ones but I think this has always standout for me. When I was directing the New York State Bar Association’s program I had come up with an idea of how we get kids to understand international law, because I felt it was important for even young people to understand that there was such a thing called international law. And so, I came up with an idea of—what if we have something that they can look at not read a book but let’s have an activity and that was to get a school from Canada and a school from New York, since I was in New York so to United States, and let’s have them argue a case between the two countries. The issue didn’t matter it had to do with water flowing from Canada to New York and if you put dam up how does it affect those living below the dam, in this case in the United States. And I thought what would make this exciting, why don’t we hold it in the United Nations. 

 

And so I learn that in order to have something held at the UN you had to have a country sponsor you, you just couldn’t go in and use one of the big general assembly rooms. So I contacted the US mission at the UN, which at that time was Jean Kirkpatrick who was the US ambassador, and quite frankly, the response I got was not only no but dismissive and I have to admit I hung up the phone and I was livid. I couldn’t believe that I would be treated this way, you can say no but you didn’t have to be so dismissive. So, I pick the phone up got the number for the Canadian mission to the United Nations contacted the Canadian mission and just ask to speak to the ambassador, and they put them on and so I presented the case and they said sure we’d love to sponsor you. So being who I am I then called back the US mission and told them that I got another country to sponsor me so never mind and in which case they said, “Well, hold on a minute” and so then they said, “No, no we’re more than willing to sponsor.” And I said, “Well, I already have a sponsor but if you’d like to co-sponsor that would be alright.” And so they did. From that moment I realized, what’s the worst thing that can happen when you ask a question? People can say no. What did I lose? Nothing. 

 

So to take that another step, a little later in the early 90’s and actually the late 80’s, I came up with another idea, how can we use the International Court of Justice in The Hague? Well, gee, let’s see if we can do something? So, I called and I ended up getting the Chief Justice of the International Court, actually they put me through. And I gave him my idea and that idea was, why don’t we have kids from the United States and the Soviet Union not compete against each other, since I said that’s what they’re all doing all the time, I said, “What if we were to get them to work together on coming up and presenting a plan on reforestation?” And the Justice said, “Hold on a minute” the next I’ve someone hold for ten minutes this is incredibly expensive call in the 80’s. At the time I’m waiting I’m thinking, how am I going to justify this expense on my budget? Anyway he comes back on he says, “I just had a chance to speak to all of my colleagues and we’d be delighted.” And this ended up being the very first time the international court was used for anything other than hearing real cases.

 

I then contacted the Soviet Embassy in Washington having first talked to the State Department, cause I didn’t want to be put on some list that I was contacting the Soviet Embassy and the fact that I wanted to have the kids working together, they said, “Sure why not.” And so we ended up getting schools from the United States and we would have a European school involved and the Soviets and we brought them all together in The Hague and they presented before the court. Now, what’s interesting is that once I put it all together I was, “How do I pay for this?” but having done it, I then contacted different corporations and foundations and they were happy to assist, just ask. But if I have done what people first told me was, don’t even think of calling the court because it’s never been used for anything else, it wouldn’t have happened and yet it did. And so from that moment on I realized that if I’m interested in something I’m going to pursue it and even getting a first no means nothing.

 

Jim Rembach:     Great story. And a part that also stood out to me just blazed, is that it was done and in a cooperative, collaborative, positive way in what you were doing. Gosh! Great story, thanks for sharing that. 

 

Eric Mondschien:     What’s really great is that the kids are still in contact with each other, that’s the part that I found fascinating. The kids from the US and Europe they all become close friends and also the kids who were from Russia, they were now all adults. 

 

Jim Rembach:     We definitely need to do more of that, thanks for sharing.  I know you’ve had an amazing career. You’ve talked about what your current passions are, you have so many things going on and being a grandfather I know that just brings you so much joy as well. If you start thinking about all the things that are on your plate, what are some of your goals?

 

Eric Mondschien:     My goals now? Wow, okay, you got me on that one. I guess I would have to say it, this particular stage of my life, the goal is to ensure that my wife and I are comfortable when we finally decide we’re done. And I don’t even know if that’s possible, I don’t know if as a human being you can never say you’re done because to me that means, “Well, you’re dead.” So you have to keep doing things. What those things maybe I’m not sure yet. Right now my wife is still working, I am in a position fortunately that I’m able to pursue my writing and I’ve had some success in that which has been good. What next? I hope I can have more time with my grandchildren before they’re too busy for me. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader Legion wishes you the very best. Now before we move on let’s get a quick word from our sponsor.

 

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Alright, here we go Fast Leader listeners, it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Eric the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster.  Eric Mondschien, are you ready to hoedown? 

 

Eric Mondschien:     I’m ready. Let’s go. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I think today the biggest constraint is time. Now that I’m focused more on writing, I see myself is that it is the strangest time that focused on writing I see myself as more of an example to others and I’ve been mentoring young people having my door always open to those who seek my advice. And I’ve also learned to say, “Great questions, I don’t have an answer for that but maybe we can find it together.”

 

Jim Rembach:     What is the best leadership advice you ever received?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I would have to say, “Don’t try to be someone that you’re not but be all the person that you are.”

 

Jim Rembach:     What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success?

 

Eric Mondschien:     I think this is also one of my aha moments, and that’s—I have taken no as a challenge especially when it is suggested that I can’t do something. And when I hear no now to my career it was, all right then let me find the door that will open, and so I don’t give up.

 

Jim Rembach:     What you feel is one of your best tools and that helps you lead in business or life?

Eric Mondschien:     Frankly, it’s been trustworthy. I believe it is the most important foundation of a professional and personal life. It is something my mom and dad taught my brother and I every day by example.

 

Jim Rembach:     What would be one book that should recommend to our listeners, it could be from any genre? 

 

Eric Mondschien:     Just one? Okay, that’s a good question, Jim. I guess I could say, “The Art of War” by Sun Tzu or “The Prince” by Machiavelli or even the collection of speeches” by Winston Churchill. But I would have to say, Questions of Character: Illuminating the Heart of Leadership through Literature by Joseph L Badaracco, Jr. of Harvard Business School and this other book, Leading Quietly, those would be the two I would highly recommend not just one.

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader listeners, you can find links to that and other bonus information from today’s show by going to fastleader.net/Eric Mondschien. Okay Eric, this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you are given the opportunity to go back to the age 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, so what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you? And why? 

 

Eric Mondschien:    Jim, I love the question. I wish I could do it. It we’re knowledge, I’d buy Apple and McDonald’s stock without a doubt. But I think the skill that I lack at 25 was patience. And that is something I wish I had more of even today.

 

Jim Rembach:    Eric it was an honor spent time with you today, can you please share the past leader listeners how they can connect with you?

 

Eric Mondschien:    They can connect with me on the web at www.ericmondschien.com. They can also go to my Facebook page which is Eric Mondschien and on Twitter which is @Eric S Mondschien.

 

Jim Rembach:    Eric Mondschien, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom, the Fast Leader Legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader Show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the www.fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster.

 

END OF AUDIO

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033: Kate Nasser: After being hit by a meatball

Kate Nasser Show Notes

Kate Nasser graduated from college with the goal of being a high school math teacher. After three months of teaching she was hit with a meatball and realized this was not what she wanted to do with her life. Needing to support herself she found a few jobs in computers and was miserable. A friend suggested that she see a career counselor. Listen to Kate tell her story of how she got over her career hump and what that counselor told her that changed her life.

Kate Nasser felt leadership within her as early as kindergarten.  She befriended a heavy set little girl in her class that others were bullying. They stopped making fun of the little girl and started to include her and play with her.  Kate at age 5 didn’t know that what she did was leadership yet this desire to help others with her strength was always there.  She was the youngest of four daughters and had to hold her own. The inner strength kept pulsing and was turning her into what she is today. The challenge was getting comfortable with her strength and living it without overwhelming others.

The journey wasn’t smooth. There were people in college and early job days who shunned her. It was lesson after lesson in becoming comfortable with herself even when it meant being alone.  It taught her many different avenues for solving problems, overcoming challenges, and building connections. Graduate school for Masters in Organizational Psychology was another set of lessons learned from the interactions in the classroom.

Ultimately all these lessons and Kate’s strength spelled her destiny of self-employment as The People Skills Coach™ for leadership, teamwork, customer service, and employee engagement.  The underlying message of all her work is: Interact and lead with courage AND balance.  Achievement is not the big challenge. Balance is!  Her blog posts often take on the challenge of balance in leadership as do her workshops. She is working on her first book about quickly spotting and adapting to personality types without losing your sense of self.  Very powerful tool for success and happiness.

Kate has also created a forum for others to discuss, share, and learn about strength, balance, and interactions. It is the #Peopleskills global Twitter chat Sundays 10amET and associated 24×7 online community.  She also wanted to readdress the issue of bullying and the chat features an online #Stopbullying rally once a quarter.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen and @katenasser will help you get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“I have grown in my business insight when I am learning to samba.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet

“You can be honest without being blunt.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“You can succeed without insulting people.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Be open-minded, not indecisive.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Somebody has a different view, okay, you don’t have to fight them on it.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“You can’t be passive in your life.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“I hate the word follower; everyone is a collaborator.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“When it comes to fast leader, the key word is sooner.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Learn as much as you can, everywhere you can, regardless of whether you think you will use it.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Dancing is my sanity get away.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“When you love what you do you don’t need to retire.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Start sooner and speak up sooner.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

“Success does not come from waiting; start sooner.“ -Kate Nasser Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Kate Nasser graduated from college with the goal of being a high school math teacher. After three months of teaching she was hit with a meatball and realized this was not what she wanted to do with her life. Needing to support herself Kate found a few jobs in computers and finally was hired by a large pharmaceutical company and was totally miserable. A friend suggested that she see a career counselor. What the counselor told Kate was a total shock. Listen to Kate tell her story of how she got over her career hump and what that counselor told her that changed her life.

Advice for others

Be open-minded, not indecisive.

Holding her back from being an even better leader

Know how

Best Leadership Advice Received

Inspire people, don’t overwhelm them.

Secret to Success

Self-awareness and courage

Best Resources in business or Life

Inner strength and inner talent.

Recommended Reading

Mental Toughness For Women Leaders: 52 Tips To Recognize and Utilize Your Greatest Strengths

Contacting Kate

Website: http://katenasser.com/

email: info [at] katenasser.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katenasser

Twitter: https://twitter.com/katenasser

More Resources

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

Show Transcript: 

[expand title=”Click to access edited transcript”]

033: Kate Nasser: After being hit by a meatball

 

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks, Kimberly. Okay, Fast Leader legion, I am excited because I get the opportunity to share with you somebody who’s really been a mentor to me for many years I look up to her. She’s one of those folks where when you think about quotes and soundbites in your head you hear her voice, her name is Kate Nasser. Kate was born and raised in Upstate New York where she was the youngest of four daughters and had to hold her own. As young as the age of five, Kate felt leadership and the desire to help others when she befriended a heave set little girl in her kindergarten class that others were bullying. They stop making fun the little girl and started to include her and play with her. This inner strength kelp pulsing inside Kate but her hump was getting comfortable with her strength and living with it without overwhelming others,

 

Her journey wasn’t smooth, after being shunned in college and early jobs, Kate learned a valuable lesson in becoming comfortable with herself even when it meant being alone. It taught her many different avenues of solving problems, overcoming challenges, and building connections. Ultimately all these lessons and Kate’s strength spelled her destiny of self-employment as the people skills coach for leadership team or customer service and employee engagement. The underlying message in all of her work is, interact and lead with courage and balance.

 

Kate has also created a form for others to discuss, share and learn about strength, balance interactions. It’s the People Skills global Twitter chat Sundays at 10 AM Eastern and associated with a 24/7 online community. Kate Nasser are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Kate Nasser::   I’m ready.

 

Jim Rembach:    I’m so glad you’re here with me today. I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you but can you tell us what your current passion is so that we get to know you better?

 

Kate Nasser:     Sure. My current passion is twofold. Certainly, in my personal life I’m doing something now for  10 years that I wanted to do in the very beginning and that was be a dancer. And of course, my father said no, and that was the end of it, I wasn’t even allowed to take ballet lessons like most little girls, so no pink tutu for me back then but I did some dancing in college and Jazz that sort of thing but about 10 years ago I found Latin dancing and I have the most, the most incredible teacher, coach in New York City and it has become a learning experience not just in Latin dancing, because he’s not a typical dancer in terms of being totally focused on dance, he is actually a business man, there’s a little bit of philosopher in him, so I have grown in my own business inside and he told me the same thing about him. From the interactions that we have when while I’m learning to samba, how do we get to that, I don’t know but it’s quite true. And then my business, my big passion, is what it has been for 27 years, this is my 27th year in business, and it’s all about teaching people and coaching people to interact in a positive way without losing the honesty. Because people think that it’s okay if you’re going to be authentic, just tell people whatever—[Laugh] No, you can be honest without being blunt, you can succeed without insulting people and that’s where the whole passion connects there. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Gosh! Kate, I think that’s an awesome story. Thanks for sharing both of them. For me, there’s something that really stuck out when you started talking about learning to dance, and the interaction and the development and growth that came outside of dance, by opening up your network and your mind and I think that’s phenomenal. If you think about one thing that you would give as a piece of advice to others in regards to that learning and growth development that you gone through, what would it be?

 

Kate Nasser:    Be open minded not indecisive. He and I, my dance teacher during the personality scale he’s an analytic, he’s a driver analytic, I’m an expressive driver so he wants to go to the flowchart and I teach this when I teach adapting the personality type. Here it was right in front of me every Saturday a real life experience where I had to do it and he has come to learn it from me. So, the point is that be open minds, someone’s a different personality types, somebody has a different view. Okay, you don’t have to fight on it you can listen, you can express yourself, he and I have influenced each other to the point now where he quotes me and I quote him, it is incredible [Laugh]. 

 

Jim Rembach:   That is incredible and I think it’s that’s a great piece of advice, thanks for giving it. Now, you are one of those folks like I had mention that a lot of times I think about soundbites in my head and the way that we pull those things out in our memory a lot of times they are associated with some voice, some inflection and passion and absolutely Kate you have it and I appreciate all of that in you. But we have to be energized from a lot of things in our lives, you talked about just those stories and how they give you energy and a new found perception and view and belief and all that, but we look at quotes on the Fast Leader show because they do inspire us. Are there some quotes for you that do that, give you that energy?

 

Kate Nasser:    I love inspirational quotes, I find them—in fact, in one of the darkest and most difficult times of my personal life which was affecting my business life for a while, not in terms of what I deliver to the customers, but when I’d be done working I’d sort of ‘emplowed’ and I needed to be able to pump back up because the next day I still had to be on as it were. I found DVD, and I’m sure now it’s online, they had this quotes that came up a music behind it and it was only like a two minute DVD and I remember there was one day I was in this office, I sat here I watched that inspirational DVD 13 times in a row before I felt lifted up and out of what was weighing me down. I could quote quotes for two hours, I think for me it’s probably this one, let me see if I can get it right, ‘Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead. Don’t walk in front me, I may not follow just walk beside me and be with me.” But that’s not mine, I don’t want to take credit for that and I will have to look up where I found that. But again, I’m always looking for this balance and leadership has always been defined traditionally as somebody out there telling you what to do, I always hated that. I mean, you can’t just be passive in your life, and I hate the word follower, to me, everyone is a collaborator you’re not on the leash being dragged along. Again don’t walk behind me I may not be leading every moment and don’t walk in front of me I may not follow you but walk beside me, be with me, that’s the one that I think says it all.

 

Jim Rembach:    I love the depth of what that provides for us today in regards to talking about the multi-generations within the workplace, everything that were having to deal with. Especially at my age, aging of parents—young kids, Oh, my goodness. Thanks so much for sharing that. We talked in your bio about being one of many, talked about your dad not allowing the tutu in the house, [Laughter] we’ve all had humps to get over, can you think of a time where you’ve had a hump to get over and it really defined and shaped you?

 

Kate Nasser:    Oh, yeah. It absolutely hands-down, this is my story if anybody wants to hear my story. I came out of college thinking that I was going to be a high school math teacher. I did that for three months. After being hit by a meatball I realized this is not what I want to do with my life because in college—when you study math unless you happen to be Einstein, which I wasn’t, I had to work hard, we we’re study Calculus at midnight this is tough stuff, but I love math I was good at it and I love teaching, so I thought that’s perfect for me.

 

I realized very quickly that, “Okay, I’m not going to do this, this is not what I pictured teaching to be. So, the first stump was, “What do I do now? I have to get a job, I have to support myself.” I went in to computers, just because that’s what the job availability was. So, I got in to computers, I was working at my first company, left there and went to another company. Second company was—they had technology older than the first company so, I was travelling backwards in my career, which is not a good thing to do. Then I finally landed a job with a very, very large pharmaceutical, well-known pharmaceutical company –Made it, right? Why wasn’t I’m happy, I’m was still as discontented, I was like always at home, I’d come home from work and I’d be angry and just—whatever. 

 

And a friend of mine said, “You’re incredibly smart. You’re young, you’re talented, what the hell are you doing being so disappointed and so angry all the time? Why don’t you go and see a career counselor? And maybe they can help you, and see knew of one—it was a private one not to the corporation I was working for. I went to her she did the personality indicators, it’s funny because this is what I do now giving a lot of this things, and she came back to me after—we talked for about two weeks. She came back to me and she said, “The reason you’re not happy is because you want to be self-employed.” I said, “You’re crazy! I never even had a lemonade stand, what are you talking about?” 

 

And she is very, very—I remember what she said and she had this papers about me and she pushed them across the table at me like this and she said, “Data doesn’t lie, Dearie.” She said, “You came to me that was the first big camp, you chose.” She said, “You want to change your life in some way.” So, she gave me an exercise to do for two weeks, it seems like two weeks has always been the magic number, so she said, “Here go home and do this exercise for two weeks and then come back to me.” And she said, “A pattern will emerge at the end of the exercise and you will see where you want to go” she was absolutely correct. Then I had to start putting into place a plan to leave and start my own business, and of course, that means saving up money there’s a lot of planning it is not just flipping out the door. And it was two years, not two weeks, two years to the day that I left and started my own business and that was 27 years ago. 

 

And a few years ago I found her business card in the back of my desk drawer, and how you clean out every so often, and I thought, oh, I wonder I spend so many years, I wonder if she’s still around. And I thought, what the heck. And so, pick up the phone and I dialed the number and it was her, she was still there. And I said, “I don’t know if you still remember me? My name is Kate Nasser before I could finish the sentence she said, “Oh, I remember you.” [Laugh] I like, “Okay, is that a compliment? But I wanted her to know, I really wanted her to know what a difference it made in my life, but that was it. If I had one thing to do over, and that’s sort of the message I want to send to everybody—I hope I’m not jumping ahead on your questions—but the message I would send to everybody when it comes to fast leader the key word is, “sooner”.

 

Most people think of fast as doing things quicker, chaos and rush-um-um, it’s sooner. Just like when they say, “I don’t have enough money to start an investment.” And they say it’s not how much money you have, it’s when you start. The people who invest $10 and they start at the age of 15 or something, you’ve seen that and they’ve worked out the numbers. It’s the same with achieving success, start sooner. And I got a whole list of things I could give people on what to start sooner. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I think you bring such a breath of freshness, Kate. And giving that definition of fast leader oftentimes I have to do the same thing, it’s not about doing things quickly. The beauty about fast leader is what you just shared and that we can learn from others so that we can do the right thing a little bit sooner, and that’s going to make us faster leader we’re going to learn better and we’re going to get over those humps faster when we learn about the things that others have had to go through. 

 

Kate Nasser:    I love your word, learning. In fact, I was teaching a class years ago, it was a four-day class on consulting skills on how to help people who want to become consultants, and I always started the class with this one message, “Learn as much as you can everywhere you can regardless of whether you think you will use it.” I am constantly learning, constantly I learn from listening to you, I learn from reading books, I learn from doing, I learn from teaching. Every time I teach I come home I’m pumping up the energy for them, and thank God I’m and extrovert so it doesn’t drain me, but I come home all energized there’s always one or two things I learn from my students my customers, keep learning. Oh, my Gosh! It’s like a free feast—

 

Jim Rembach:    Yeah. And it’s amazing when you opened up your opportunities to learn more just by taking the dancing class, just amazing.   

 

Kate Nasser:    Yeah. Dancing is my sanity getaway. 

 

Jim Rembach:    There’s one thing, I do also a lot of studying in Appreciative Inquiry which is based in positive psychology, and one of the things that appreciative inquiry talks about is unlikely pairs. What that means as far you’re learning is concerned is that you need to seek out others that are different from you because that will give you greater opportunities for learning instead of having somebody who thinks exactly like you. But the key is to be open for it, like you did mention earlier. So, go and find some unlikely pairs. Kate, thanks for sharing those stories. Now, you talked about your work, you talked about how that is continue to develop, you talked about doing it for many years and I know that it’s something for you that it has become part of your DNA and I don’t see you ever stopping, I just don’t.

 

Kate Nasser:    People are starting to say, “So, when are you going to retire? I’m think about first of all I’m age-wise if you look at it I’m not close to that. But my heads said always said, “Why?” [Laugh]  Why? You’ve heard this this is an age old quote, “When you love what you do, you don’t need to retire.” What I’m fascinated by, and again I’m always learning, there’s a lot of people who were in a job, good job, career and then they do retire because when you’re in a company sometimes they indirectly force people out of certain age, you know they deny it. But I have close knowledge of at least 3 people who have gone on to do other things and they are happier than I have ever seen them. And for one, it’s another full time job but she went from being very big time HR Director at a large pharmaceutical company to teaching business and HR but not in a business school she teaches it a fashion design school and she’s always telling me about how her students are teaching her about fashion. Till I slide up, the clay mine have been lighting up 27 years so whether you love what you do right now, and you want to stay in it forever, or whether you are having a job and it’s a good job but it doesn’t really light your fire, when you do leave don’t be afraid that you’re going to think, “Oh, my what am I going to do in retirement? Am I going to be bored?” No, you’re going to find what’s really in you, it’s just right now you may not know what that thing is.

 

Jim Rembach:    Yeah. Just stay open piece and be a life lone learners definitely the underlying component and message there that we have to. Sometimes force yourself into it. We’re not wired to do different we’re just not. That’s the unfortunate thing, so it does take a little bit of energy units, I was introduced to that phrase the other day, to be able to do that. If you think about your goals, what is one of your goals that you’re shooting for right now? 

 

Kate Nasser:    Right now I am writing my first book. I’ve been blogging for years now and I didn’t even want to write. When someone tell me I should start up blog I said, “Why didn’t you just pull my fingernails out, the thought of it was so horrific for me.” Then I fell in love with it because I’m a speaker you know how it is. So, writing a book is a bit of a challenge for me because at least with writing a blog, it’s 600 words give or take, you know and bing, bing, bing—writing a book! I’ve got to organize it and also I am writing, it’s my goal, I am working on it there’s a bit of a challenge because I’m a speaker. Someone said, “Well, speak it and write it” so, that’s what I’m doing now, and then you have to go back and edit it—that’s a big goal. 

 

My other goal is that, I guess I’m in learning mode to how accomplish it. I want to combine the speaking and the entertainment part of my life because I’ve always been a performer at heart. And years ago I used to do musical theatre as a hobby, musical comedy show and so forth, and I had to give that up to start my own business because I was on the road all the time. One day my sister happened to be doing an engagement here in New Jersey, my sister came with me because we had to leave after that to go on a trip. So, she sat in the back of the room and afterwards she went out to the car and she was just kind of smirking and laughing I said, “What are you doing? What’s with you?” And she said, “Now I know why you don’t miss theatre.” She said, “Because it’s like watching a one women show up there” and I never forgot that. And I want to try to find venues where there’s a little bit more of the entertainment piece as well as the content of what I speak. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Well, Fast Leader legion wishes you the very best. Okay, Kate it’s time for the rapid part of our show and that’s the—Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Kate the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster. Kate Nasser, are you ready to hoedown?

 

Kate Nasser:    I’ll try. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright. What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today?

 

Kate Nasser:    Know how. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you have ever received?

 

Kate Nasser:    Inspire people, don’t overwhelm them. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success?

 

Kate Nasser:    Self-awareness and courage.

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of your best resources that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Kate Nasser:    Inner strength and inner talent.

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book, and I know that going to be tough and it doesn’t have to be a business book, what would be one book that you would recommend to our listeners?

 

Kate Nasser:    52 Tips to Recognize and Utilize Your Greatest Strengths by LaRae Quy.

Jim Rembach:    Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligent practitioner, Jim Rembach.Okay, Fast Leader listeners, you can find links to that book and other bonus material from today’s show by going to fastleader.net/Kate Nasser. Okay, Kate this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question. Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, so, what one piece of knowledge or skill would you take back with you? And why? 

 

Kate Nasser:    Start sooner and speak up sooner. And why? Because success does not come from waiting, so start sooner. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Kate, it was an honor spending time with you today. Can you please share with our Fast Leader legion how they can connect with you?

 

Kate Nasser:    Sure. I have my website, katenasser.com. I also have the People Skills community and you can get information on that. I’m all over Twitter, just at 50,000 followers today, not that that was the goal but it does help to have a wider audience. And of course, through my email, info@katenasser.com and I would love to connect with people. So, bring on the questions. 

 

Kate, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom, the Fast Leader legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. 

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster.

 

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