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107: Carey Azzara: It threw my family into a collective depression

Carey Azzara Show Notes

Carey Azzara was filled with grief as a youth. His sister passed away at a young age and Carey was deeply affected by the loss and from witnessing the grief of his parents. Fortunately for Carey he had an amazing grandmother that helped him to get over the hump.

Carey started life in Bellville NJ, by the time he was three he was spending as much time in Newark with a grandmother and two Aunts as he was at home. His newborn sister had been diagnosed with a rare blood disease – Thalassemia. It changed his life dramatically.

Carey often says life is not a straight path. His life has had many a twist and turn. Losing his only sister when he was sixteen he struggled to regain direction. Withdrawn he focused on schoolwork and was an honor student through his four years of high school.

He entered Rutgers University, joined a fraternity, and thought about a career in medicine, but it was not to be. His only motivation to be in college was to avoid going to war. However, even that was not enough to sustain his interest in academia.

Luckily, for him the war ended before he was drafted. It would be a couple of years before he found a path back to completing his education. Since then he has accomplished goals such as the pursuit of two graduate degrees, a career in public health, VP of market research, and President of a marketing company AtHeath, LLC. During his career in marketing research and as an internet marketer he published numerous articles, reports, and books.

Along the way, an unhappy marriage ended in divorce and he met and married his current wife of nearly twenty-five years. He and his wife Patrice raised a blended family. They also rescued a few dogs.

A few years back as he contemplated retirement. He downsized his collection of classic cars and began writing short stories about the cars he’s owned. His life experiences have inspired him to continue writing broadening his story plots well beyond cars.

Carey is the author of The Lottery Curse, a book of literary fiction that shines bright lights on the dangers that can befall even the best-intentioned lottery winner.

Carey current lives in a suburb of Boston MA where he and his family have resided for over twenty years. He works everyday on his writing and the marketing of his books. He’s happy in his work and says that becoming a writer not only brings him joy, but solves the worry he had about becoming useless.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @Carey_Azzara to get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“When you create a customer persona think about their motivation.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet

“Find people that are smarter than you to work with.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“If you’re an A performer, don’t hire B performers.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“Always try to find somebody that can teach you things.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“We have a notion that we’re expected to know everything when put in a leadership role.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“You have to grow into a leadership role.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“Talk to people that are in the position that you’re going to assume.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“Ask successful people what they attribute their success to.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“Learn what you can from someone who’s gone through the steps that you are going to take.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“You’re not going to get there tomorrow – start today with one foot in front of the other.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

“Reputation can save the day.” -Carey Azzara Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Carey Azzara was filled with grief as a youth. His sister passed away at a young age and Carey was deeply affected by the loss and from witnessing the grief of his parents. Fortunately for Carey he had an amazing grandmother that helped him to get over the hump.

Advice for others

Go talk to people that have been in or are in the position that you are going to assume.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

Being the CEO of my own career worrying about the current political climate.

Best Leadership Advice Received

Hire people that are smarter than you.

Secret to Success

Be a plugger. Just plug away.

Best tools that helps in Business or Life

The relationships I have with my family.

Recommended Reading

The Lottery Curse

The 48 Laws of Power

Contacting Carey

Email: cazzara [at] gmail.com

Amazon author page: http://amzn.to/2kG4onP

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/careyvazzara

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Carey_Azzara

Resources and Show Mentions

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

 107: Carey Azzara: It threw my family into a collective depression

 

Intro Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

 

Need a powerful and entertaining way to ignite your next conference, retreat or team-building session? My keynote don’t include magic but they do have the power to help your attendees take a leap forward by putting emotional intelligence into their employee engagement, customer engagement and customer centric leadership practices. So bring the infotainment creativity the Fast Leader show to your next event and I’ll help your attendees get over the hump now. Go to beyondmorale.com/speaking to learn more.

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader Legion, we’re going to have a good show today because the guests that I have today gives a very unique perspective on some of the things that are affecting both our job and our life. Carey B. Azarra started life in Belleview, New Jersey. By the time he was three he was spending as much time in Newark with a grandmother and two aunts as he was at home. His newborn sister had been diagnosed with a rare blood disease Thalassemia it changed his life dramatically. Carey often says life is not a straight path his life has had many twists and turns losing his only sister when he was he struggled to regain direction withdrawn. He focused on schoolwork and was an honor student through his four years of high school. He entered Rutgers University joined a fraternity and thought about a career in medicine but it was not to be. His only motivation to be in college was to avoid going to war, however, even that was not enough to sustain his interest in academia, luckily for him the war ended before he was drafted it would be a couple of years before he found a path back to completing his education. 

 

Since then he has accomplished goals such as the pursuit of two graduate degrees, a career public health, VP of market research, and President of a marketing company. During his career in market research and as an Internet marketer he published numerous articles, reports and books. Along the way an unhappy marriage ended in divorce and he met and married his current wife of nearly years. He and his wife Patrice raised a blended family they also rescued a few dogs. A few years back he contemplated retirement, he downsize his collection of classic cars and began writing short stories about the cars he owned. His life experiences have inspired him to continue writing and broadening his story plots well beyond cars. Carey, is the author of The Lottery Curse a book published by Something or Other Publishing of literary fiction that shines bright lights on the dangers that befall even the best intentions lottery winner. Carey currently lives in a suburb of Boston Massachusetts where he and his family have resided for over years. Carey Azarra, are you ready to help us get over the hump. 

 

Carey Azarra:    Yes, I am. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks, Carey. I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you, but can you tell us what your current passion is so we get to know you even better. 

 

Carey Azarra:    My current passion is about writing, the marketing has to be done but the real passion is around the writing. And the editing, editing is something that is—in the early stages of my career I look upon this as kind of a thing I had to do now I look upon it as something that helps me make the story better and I will I actually enjoy it. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Now one of the things I found interesting and one of the reason that I have you on the show is because reading about your life and your story, where you’d come from and your background in market research which a lot of the folks that are both guests as well as listeners on the Fast Leader show get exposure through their customer experience and customer-care work, I think to me you have become an expert in a lot of different ways around human behavior and why people do the things that they do and why they shouldn’t do certain things. 

 

Carey Azarra:    I’d like to think that’s true. I like to think that not only my life experiences but my career and the work I did in marketing research and also in research prior to that in in public health and the fact that I grew up in a very large family all of which combine to give me appreciation for the human condition. 

 

Jim Rembach:    So when you start thinking about putting those worlds together and being able to tell a story to engage people, what do you think are some of the elements that you focus in on that essentially for you knows that it’s going to work? 

 

Carey Azarra:    For me it comes down to characters. I don’t write a lot of fiction around high-tech things, I don’t write about you know vampires and going to worlds that don’t exist, so, for me it’s about the relationships and the thing I’ve been told recently good at is dialogue. So, I try to focus a lot on understanding the motivations for each character, getting an idea of how they fit into the story sometimes that happens as you’re writing, sometimes it’s something you plan ahead and outline, a lot of times I will write bios for each character before I actually start writing the plot through and in doing that I hope to bring the characters alive and the relationships they have with the other characters in the story. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s the part that’s really fascinating to me because in a lot of the work that people that I know they’re doing and building personas. They build persona so that they make sure that their marketing and telling stories to those particular people in order to engage them to do business with their brands, buy their products and services, and maybe even be interested in some of their new product launches. So, when you start thinking about building that persona piece how do you go through that process? 

 

Carey Azarra:    I start with them graphics. A man or a woman, how old is this person, what’s their eye color, what hair color do they have and what’s their complexion and then I try to build from that core, what their family looks like. Are they single child in their family, were they the third child, the middle child and you build out from there because those that are the crucial building blocks for anybody’s personality and I think can appreciate better as an author as you’re trying to develop that character where they might go, what they might do or say once you have a sense or kind of where they came from. 

 

Jim Rembach:    It’s also critically important when you start talking about being able to identify your customer, be more customer-centric. When you start talking about serving them and being able to connect with them when you’re interacting them in a different touch points that an organization has with them. And you write in your recent book about The Lottery Curse about the windfall of winning money and having as you say a sudden—you had mentioned that the sudden windfall of having cash. So, for me I also think about the sudden windfall of people within an organization when it comes to now being given or getting the opportunity to become a leader, now given the opportunity to manage a particular project or an organization. So, what are some of the things that happens when somebody has that sudden windfall that causes them not to be successful with it? 

 

Carey Azarra:    Let me go back a step and just comment first on the idea that as you’re trying to think about your customers you really want to create a persona of that customer and understand not just what they might buy but what the motivations for that purchases, what’s going to bring them to the table, if you will. What’s expected in becoming a leader is someone hands you, presumably you’ve earned it, the right to take on the next level of leadership.  What I try to do in my career is to find people who are smarter than me to work with. If you have the opportunity to hire people don’t hire people who are B’s, if you’re an A don’t hire B’s and if you’re B don’t hire C’s. Just always try to find somebody who can teach you things, can bring value to the team that you’re hopefully going to lead in a way that expands upon on the perspective that you have. 

 

Jim Rembach:    So that is interesting. In the book, The Lottery Curse, you talked about a couple of different folks that actually receive this windfall, how did they not do those things? 

 

Carey Azarra:    It turns out that people who receive a windfall, specifically, from the lottery but it could be other sources if they haven’t had the experience of managing large amounts of money really dealing with finances other than weekly paycheck then they something goes awry in their brain and they say just want to explode, buy things, do things that that they never had the opportunity to do before and they very rarely, there are exceptions certainly, but they very rarely step back and let some time pass and stay with where they are and they don’t—the people are successful don’t explore things too quickly,  they sit back and they don’t tell a lot of people about their newfound wealth. It turns out that it’s not just the wealth and the fact that you now can afford a two million-dollar house instead of the $30, 000 home you had before, your whole social network change. The people that you’re associating with you don’t fit with them anymore, they don’t really feel comfortable around you. And t the people that you might think you would fit with, the other millionaires in the in the community, no, you don’t really fit with them either because you came into the money very quickly. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I think for me I find—as I mentioned why I wanted to have you on the show and I find it so interesting is I find a direct connection to people who automatically come into power and people who automatically come into money.

 

Carey Azarra:    I think there’s definitely some parallels. I think there are different kinds of dangers and trap doors that you have to be careful of, and I think you’re right, they’re definitely parallels. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And so for me even when you were going through and talking about that somebody who came to that sudden windfall I pulled out a couple things from folks who have come into that position of power within an organization, that is pause. Be mindful. It is seek other help and support don’t think that you know-it-all. Understand the strength of those around you and be prepared to be in an odd position in the in-between state between those senior level folks and those ones that you just, I don’t want to say left behind, but the ones that now report to you that were your superiors previously. 

 

Carey Azarra:    I think we have this notion that is if we are put into a leadership role that suddenly everybody expects us to know everything. Expects us to be perfect in what we’re going to do it and yes, they are looking to you for, what are we going to do next boss? At the same time there is a realization that you have to grow into that role. And I think people do appreciate the fact that you ask their opinion, you’re genuinely listening to what they feel they can bring to the table and whatever endeavor it is and if you ask them to give you time they will. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I also think too, it’s really interesting because I know of several folks that have wanted, like you even say in the book people want to win the lottery, they try desperately to do but they don’t really think about what would happen if it if it occurred, same thing when you start coming to positions of power it seems glamorous, I want to move up, I want to have that bigger and greater responsibility but they don’t prepare and plan for when it does come what they’re supposed to do. If you were to give a piece of advice to those that are seeking, to want to have that position of power even win the lottery above them, what would you tell them in order to  put them in a better mindset so that they allow that that glamour to consume them? 

 

Carey Azarra:    I would say, and I did this so I know it works, but I would say, go talk to people who are in the position or similar vision that you’re going to assume. Go talk to that person, ask him how—and certainly it would be better if you have somebody who you believe is successful, and go ask them what they attribute their success to? What did they do when they had to make that transition? Learn what you can from, essentially, a mentor and you know it and someone who’s gone through the steps that you’re about to take.  

 

Jim Rembach:    What we’re talking about, there’s so much emotion talking about relationships and everything in what we’re referring to in regards to becoming of power, losing power, getting power or in being disenchanted, money, windfall of those things, a lot of times we look at quotes in order to help us on the show. Is there a quote or two that you can share that helps and impacts you? 

 

Carey Azarra:    Let’s see, I think this might sound trite but I get up in the morning and I put one foot in front of the other and honestly that’s what it takes, I mean whether you’re going to be a leader or a writer you just have to put the time in and you have to be thoughtful as I said earlier you have to really put one foot in front of the other. And I have discovered is that it’s not a sprint it’s a marathon as people have said. I’ve developed a lot of marketing capacity, pretty good platform social media connections, I didn’t do that overnight I did it 20 minutes a day, day in and day out and that’s what I tell people, you’re not going to get there tomorrow but if you start today and you put one foot in front of the other you will eventually develop whatever it is you need to meet your goals. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Without a doubt. As we were through what we’re talking about is there’s a lot of stops and starts of pivots and turns and realizations and mistakes that we make and we have to get over those humps. Is there a time where you have to get over the hump and its really made an impact on your life? 

 

Carey Azarra:    Yeah. Well, talked about in the introduction one of the biggest humps I had to get over was the loss of my sister at a pretty early age. And it really threw me for a loop, not just me it wasn’t just my grief but it was watching the grief of my parents. Losing a child has got to be the single most heart-wrenching thing that anyone I think can probably go through in life. So, it just threw me and the family, my immediate family, into a collective compression and getting over that was very hard, it’s very hard. I had a grandmother, she just passed now my mom’s mom, and without her I don’t know that I would have made it and in fact I’m dedicating my next to her, she was a force to be reckoned with I tell you and she really did make a huge difference in getting me through a lot of grief. 

 

Jim Rembach:    So when you start thinking about—thanks for sharing and I’m sorry about that—when you start thinking about going through that and coming out of that and you’re talking about her being strong, how did she help you do that? 

 

Carey Azarra:    My grandmother raised six girls during the Depression. She lost her husband to a botched surgery he had a construction company and she took over the construction company, so she raised six girls during the Depression, she ran the construction company and she was one of the early people to learn how to drive this was a woman who just could not be knock down, she did get knocked down but she always got up, and that was the lesson she ended up teaching me. She would say to me, Carey in life bad things are going to happen and you’re going to get knocked down and it’s not about whether you get knocked down or not it’s about whether you get up brush yourself off and move forward and that’s what I want to always see you do, and I learn that lesson from her. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Wow! What an amazing woman. When you start thinking though about talking about the semi-retirement piece and you wanted to tell me off mic that how you wanted to make sure that you were still you know making an impact you don’t to retire to the pasture but you wanted to continue to impact and support and help and make a difference in the world. But if you start thinking about all the things that you got going on, what’s one of your goals? 

 

Carey Azarra:    Well, as I build more skills as a writer I feel like what I want to impart to people in the stories I write is the importance of relationships. I’m finishing a novel now the title is Caitlyn’s Mourning it’s about a family in Maine and it spans five generations. The story starts off with how this family ends up in some really severe challenges particularly the three main characters but it starts off with a young woman who’s just starting her third year of college. And the idea of behind the book was—it was actually inspired by a real story someone told me a story about her life and the fact that for a number of reasons that I will not get into, the only person her son had as a male role model was his great-grandfather. So there were two generations missing between he and his—and I took that Colonel and I thought that can really be a great centerpiece for understanding relationships even when there’s a big gap in the family. And so the story talks about how that gap occurred that’s the first couple of chapters and then how the family fills that gap. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader Legion wishes you the very best. Now before we move on let’s get a quick word from our sponsor. 

 

The number one thing that contributes to customer loyalty is emotions. So move onward and upward faster by getting significantly deeper insight and understanding of your customer journey and personas with emotional intelligence. With your empathy mapping workshop you learn how to evoke and influence the right customer emotions that generate improve customer loyalty and reduce your cost to operate. Get over your emotional hump now by going to empathymapping.com to learn more. 

 

Okay, Fast Leader Legion, it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Carey, the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster, Carey Azarra, are you ready to hoedown? 

 

Carey Azarra:    I am. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright. So, what do you think is holding you back for being an even better leader today? 

 

Carey Azarra:    I’ll tell you. Recently, I’ve been very concerned about the direction our country’s going in and what’s holding me back from being a better leader, in my case leading my own—being the CEO of my own writing career is very distracted with the politics. So, that’s kind of what’s holding me back. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you’ve ever received? 

 

Carey Azarra:    As I said earlier, hire people that are smarter than you are. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success? 

 

Carey Azarra:    Be a plugger. Just plug away. I’m not the smartest guy and I’m not the most handsome guy but I plug along and that’s how I’ve been able to create successes in my life. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of your best tools that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Carey Azarra:    As tools—I’d like to say my wife but I don’t want to call her a tool but I think it’s the relationships I had with my family. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book, and it could be from any genre, that you’d recommend to our listeners?

 

Carey Azarra:    There’s a book called the, Fifty Laws of Power, it is a little bit Machiavellian but it actually has some very good lessons in it. One of the lessons that I took from it was about reputation. And it was about this Chinese warrior who had the reputation for being just enormously fierce. To make a long story short, he finds himself in a situation where he doesn’t have the army he needs to repel the enemy that’s coming to him so he opens the gates and sits in front of the gates on top of a chair up above and just sort of challenges them in to come in, it’s a complete bluff but his reputation saves the day. And reputation can save the day and it’s easy to lose, hard to create but very much worth the effort. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader listeners you can find links to that and other bonus information including a link to Carey’s book, The Lottery Curse, going to show notes at fastleader.net/Carey Azarra. Okay, Carey this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you have been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why?

 

Carey Azarra:    I would take back my writing skills. Now that I’ve learned how fun it is, if I could go back to 25 and have my writing skills I could finish all the projects I started. At this age, I’m in my 60’s, at this age I worry about not being able to finish everything before I pass on.

 

Jim Rembach:    Carey, it was an honor to spend time with you today, can you please share with the Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you? 

 

Carey Azarra:    You can connect with me via email, my email address is pretty simple it’s the first letter of my first name and my last name, cazzara@gmail.com and you can also go to my Amazon page the author page, and I have a Twitter account, that’s my first and last name with the underscore between the two. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Carey Azarra, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom, the Fast Leader Legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. 

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster. 

 

END OF AUDIO 

 

106: Wendy Keller: I was not physically able to sit up

Wendy Keller Show Notes

Wendy Keller was not physically able to sit up because of the terrible injuries from the car accident that claimed the lives of her two young children. That’s when she decided to get involved with Tony Robbin’s Personal Power program. She did exactly those actions recommended in the program. Listen in as Wendy shares what happened.

Wendy was born in Chicago but lived all over the place.

When Wendy Keller was four, her dad took off. She didn’t see him again until she found him when she was 28.

When she was six, her mom remarried. Soon after, her parents joined an extreme Fundamentalist Christian cult. They believed, that the End Times were coming any day, and that women were made solely to serve men.

Despite this, when she was 10 she won a district-wide writing contest; at 11, she won her first sales contest; at 16, she graduated high school and began college. She got her dream job working at a newspaper and won a scholarship to attend Arizona State University.

After her scholarship ran out, she didn’t have enough money to stay. Her parents offered to pay for her education if she switched to the college her church ran in Pasadena, California. That’s where you went if you hoped to marry a minister. She had no such hope. She wanted to be a journalist.

After that college expelled her for claiming her love to a church outsider and labeling it as sexual misconduct, Wendy was devastated. But then, a few weeks later, a handsome guy whose girlfriend had recently declined his marriage proposal started talking to her. She married him less than a year later.

In time, they had two darling, beloved children: Jeremy Winston and Amelia Louise. Her marriage was suffering, but the kids were the focus of their life.

In 1989, Wendy started Keller Media, a literary agency, helping writers sell their book manuscripts to publishers. And in 1991, her family took a vacation to the London Book Fair. While driving down a little country road, her husband forgot to look both ways an intersection and was struck by a car at 65 kph. Amelia died instantly. Jeremy was taken off life support 3 days later. (read more: http://wendykeller.com/meet-Wendy/)

Ever since March 15, 1991, when the children died, Wendy has survived the grief of losing her children and her own horrendous injuries, giving birth again, surviving a divorce, a natural disaster, and a substance-abusing child. And she has persevered.

As of today, Wendy has personally taught +20,000 authors how to get published; and over 7,500 people how to get started as paid, professional speakers. Today, she is the author of 31 published books. She has been a featured guest on 53 television programs, has been a guest on +500 radio shows, and has been interviewed/quoted in hundreds of publications.

Wendy currently lives in Marina Del Ray, California.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @wendykeller to get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet 

“Everyone suffers at 100%.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet

“Everyone suffers their own losses at levels they’re capable.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Bad stuff happens to everybody.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“You can’t start something twenty years ago; just get started.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Get out there and start whacking weeds and forging your way.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“That first step is the enormous one, after that things get easier.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“We tend to want to take the easy fun part and blame others with the rest.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Do you want to grow or do you want to sit there and whine?” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Being reflective is a really important skill.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Usually we’re our own biggest obstacle.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Getting in front of people is how you get good at getting in front of people.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

“Not everyone can be coerced into a model that I would prefer.” -Wendy Keller Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Wendy Keller was not physically able to sit up because of the terrible injuries from the car accident that claimed the lives of her two young children. That’s when she decided to get involved with Tony Robbin’s Personal Power program. She did exactly those actions recommended in the program. Listen in as Wendy shares what happened.

Advice for others

Enroll yourself in a dance class. Take a comedy class. Sign up to speak.

Holding her back from being an even better leader

Time management strategies.

Best Leadership Advice Received

Put yourself in the other person’s shoes all the time. Show more compassion.

Secret to Success

I am a pitbull. You hold on until you get it.

Best tools that helps in Business or Life

My ability to learn anything new – technology, strategy, anything.

Recommended Reading

Ultimate Guide to Platform Building (Ultimate Series)

Web Copy That Sells: The Revolutionary Formula for Creating Killer Copy That Grabs Their Attention and Compels Them to Buy

Contacting Wendy

Website: http://www.kellermedia.com/

Website: http://wendykeller.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kellermedia

Twitter: https://twitter.com/wendykeller

Resources and Show Mentions

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

106: Wendy Keller: I was not physically able to sit up

 Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we uncover the leadership like hat that help you to experience, break out performance faster and rocket to success. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

Need a powerful and entertaining way to ignite your next conference, retreat or team-building session? My keynote don’t include magic but they do have the power to help your attendees take a leap forward by putting emotional intelligence into their employee engagement, customer engagement and customer centric leadership practices. So bring the infotainment creativity the Fast Leader show to your next event and I’ll help your attendees get over the hump now. Go to beyondmorale.com/speaking to learn more.

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay Fast Leader Legion today I’m so excited because the person I have today on the show her story is absolutely awe inspiring. Wendy Keller was born and raised in Chicago but live all over the place. When Wendy was four her dad took off she didn’t see him again until she found him when she was 28. When she was six her mom remarried, soon after her parents joined in extreme fundamentalist Christian cult. They believe that the end of times were coming any day and that women were made solely to serve men. Despite this when she was 10 she won a district wide riding contest. At 11 she won her first sales contents. At 16 she graduated high school and begin college. She got her own dream job working in a newspaper and won a scholarship to attend Arizona State University. After her scholarship ran out she didn’t have enough money to stay her parent offered to pay her education if she switch to the college her church ran in Pasadena, California, that’s where you went if you hope to be a minister. She had no such hope, she wanted to be a journalist. After that College expelled her for claiming her love to a church outsider labeling it as sexual misconduct, Wendy was devastated. 

 

But then a few weeks later a handsome guy whose girlfriend had recently declined his marriage proposal started talking to her. She married him in less than a year. In time they had two darling beloved children, Jeremy Winston and Emilia Louise. Her marriage was suffering but the kids were the focus of their life. In 1989 Wendy started Keller Media, a literary agency helping writers to sell books and manuscripts to publishers. And in 1991   her family took a vacation to the London Book Fair. While driving down a little country road her husband forgot to look both ways at an intersection and the car was struck by another car traveling at 65 km/ph. Emilia died instantly, Jeremy was taken off life support three days later. Ever since March 15th 1991 when the children died Wendy has survived the grief of losing her children and her own horrendous injuries, giving birth again, surviving a divorce, a natural disaster, and a substance abusing child. And she has persevered. As of today, Wendy has personally taught over 20,000 authors how to get published and over 7,500 people how to get started as paid professional speakers. Today she is the author of 31 published books. She’s been a featured guest on 53 television programs and has been a guest on over 500 radio shows and has been interviewed, quoted in hundreds of publications. When currently lives in Marina del Rey, California. Wendy Keller are you ready to help us get over the hump? 

 

Wendy Keller:    You bet I am. Thanks for having me on the show.

 

Jim Rembach:    I’m glad you’re here. Now I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you but can you tell us what your current passion is so that we can get to know you even better? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Oh, my gosh! Jim, I have so many current passions. Whatever book I’ve got up for sale is my current passion. Whatever book I’m reading is my current passion, whatever book I’m writing next—I got a lot of passions. And I love ideas and I love information and I love learning new things in all different kinds of (3:36 inaudible)of my life. So I’m a lot like the people who take the time to listen to your excellent podcast. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I appreciate you sharing that. Reading and learning more about you as a person and that’s one of the things we really try to do in the Fast Leader show because I always tell my guess it’s not what you do that makes you great it’s who you are that makes what you do great, there’s a very distinct difference. 

 

Wendy Keller:    For sure agree with you. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And a lot of folks, they talk about one of the biggest phobias of all you know being public speaking and when I look at your bio and the things that you’ve been through I’d rather choose the public speaking route. But you’re an inspiration to a lot of folks. And when I start thinking about the barriers that are preventing people to move forward and get themselves out there build their platform, it makes me wonder when I think about your story, why? So, why do people struggle? 

 

Wendy Keller:    I think people interpret things differently. When I speak on overcoming adversity which is sort of tangential to what I do as an agent. I just gave a speech this week and I talked about—people think that the deaths of my children is so devastating that it would stop anyone in the tracks and I know that it does and it was devastating it was 20 billion times worse than anyone could ever imagine unless they’ve been through it and there’s just no way to describe it but here’s the perspective that I’ve adopted that has been part of my success I guess in functioning after that catastrophic loss and it is this: When I was six years old I had a hamster his name was Caesar because we were studying Roman history in school and after a while I was real busy with school and he wasn’t a novelty anymore and I unfortunately didn’t think he needed food and water every day I was a little kid and Caesar died. 

 

My mom explained why he died and I was absolutely devastated and so sorry and I felt so guilty and I was in such grief over the death of my hamster, and you know I’m 7 years old at that time and then my grandma died when I was nine and then other people died and then I started to learn these bad behaviors for handling loss. Like when my hamster died my mom said, “Oh, we’ll get you a new hamster, stop crying.” So, I started to pick up this bad behavior and by the time my children died there is no way to get new children, and you know the same ones or any things, and that burden was so heavy that I had to get some help to handle it. And so I went to professional people and grief counselors and started studying and I learned some strategies to help me get through such a devastating loss. 

 

But I will say this for anyone listening who’s facing any type of loss or challenge whether it’s divorce or something of the world thinks it’s minor like your dog died or your hamster died all the way to your children died which I admit is a quite significant loss in life but the difference is everyone suffers at a hundred percent. Everyone suffers their own losses at these level that they’re capable and here’s the difference in that, number one it allows you to be compassionate with yourself and number two it allows you to be compassionate with the world. And as soon as you recognize you’re not oh, so special because something bad happened to you and then the pretty much bad stuff happens to everybody, it changes your perspective and allows you to go forward in a powerful way. 

 

Jim Rembach:    It seems easy for a lot of people to probably kind of look through what all the things that you just said while you’re in it, it’s tough. 

 

Wendy Keller:    Oh, yeah. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And it doesn’t happen quickly. 

 

Wendy Keller:    No, no. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And when you’re needing that inspiration there’s a lot of places that you can go seek it and sometimes they’re incorrect. On the show we like quotes to help us find that inspiration and hopefully pull this out and pushes to particular directions that we need to go. Is there a quote or two that has influenced you that you can share?

 

Wendy Keller:    There are many quotes that influenced me and I’m kind of a quote junkie I guess because I use them to buoy myself. Right now I’m reading, The Essential Rumi by Coleman Barks which is a book I returned to many, many times. But I would have to say that one of the quotes that has really been an inspiration personally, there’s another one that’s professionally inspirational but personally is the Lao Tzu quote, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.” And when I look at the daunting things I overcome or try to overcome or the goals that I have it’s easy to go, “You know, I wish I had done this 20 years ago, but you can’t start something  20 years ago or I wish I didn’t have to go through this but you don’t have to get started because if you just sit down and feel sorry for yourself or just sit on the side of the road going, “I can’t believe I have to do this.” You’re` going to have all kinds of problems and you’re not going to make any progress you just got to get out there and start whacking just whacking the weeds and forging your way. I think of myself with a machete going through a dense jungle like, “Okay, I hate this, I’m scared there might be snakes or spiders or who knows what or tigers or whatever, you just got to get started and that first step is the enormous one and after that things start to get a little bit easier.

 

Jim Rembach:    It does get easier and it does take time and it is a journey. When we start going through those things oftentimes we have to get through it it’s a long distance away but there are humps, what a humps that we have to get over through our lives. 

 

Wendy Keller:    I don’t know if there are humps as much as Mount Everest.

 

Jim Rembach:    True. 

 

Wendy Keller:    And about the time you finish one and you’re going on the other side you’re like, “I’m going to do great, it’s all downhill for me this is awesome.” And then you see the next peak. I would say that people would say “Oh, it’s peaks and valleys” like well, no, it’s mostly peak after peak in my life.  

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s so true and like I was saying you’re just an amazing— 

 

Wendy Keller:    It’s just for a lot of people, I’m not unique in that at all.  A lot of people they get one—you know like that game that the kids play check or cheese in a whack-a-mole where you hit that poor little animal on the head and try and get the next one and they pop up randomly, and that’s owning a business, that’s being successful in your career, that’s personal life, that’s raising teenagers, there’s all parts to that and that’s just human life everybody suffers at a hundred percent. That’s really comforting quote if you really meditating and reflect on it. 

 

Jim Rembach:    So, when you think about one of those mountains that you’ve had to get over can you share that with us and the impact it had on you? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Well, obviously, the deaths of the children but I have discussed that. I think the one that is a universal experience is my divorce. So, my divorce was fall out from—you know, we weren’t really happy like you said in the intro, we weren’t really happy before the kids I wasn’t happy before the kids died, for other reasons and ironically my ex-husband and I are friends now. He comes to my house once a month for dinner with our child and whatever because we eventually had another baby, our daughter is now graduating college, but I think that one of the challenges in the way that have been able to overcome the divorce which is obviously very common thing, relationship breakup subsequent to that, is by taking time to put my emotions in let’s say box A and in box B sort of really sort through it looking for the ways that I contributed or did not ameliorate or extinguish a behavior that was negative. I have an excellent friend his name is Ford Sakes, he’s one of the intelligent, socially intelligent people I’ve ever met in my life he designs websites in Wichita Ford Sakes, really a powerful speaker also. 

 

One of the things I learned from him in our friendship is that, you know, he was in therapy for something we were talking about and the therapist said, “When you do this, this happens and it creates that result so you should try to stop doing this” and on that day he stopped doing it. When I got involved in Tony Robbins personal power program I listen to the cassettes, say how long ago that was, I was not physically able to sit up much less walk because the car accident that killed the children left me so devastated but I did exactly, verbatim, every single thing Tony said in those and I took exactly those actions and I looked at myself to see what limiting beliefs and thoughts I was using and what repetitive behaviors were resulting from those thoughts and I apply them 100% I was on Tony’s infomercial as one of his success stories for four years because I got the results. Most people go, “Oh, Wendy I want to be an author, oh, Wendy I want to be a speaker and I say. “Okay, here’s the first thing you need to do.” Well, I don’t-really—can I start somewhere else, “would it be okay if I did something else first because I don’t really want to do that. It’s a good idea I’m sure you’re right but—and it’s the same way when we’re dealing with major obstacles in our lives we tend to want to take the easy fun part and blame the spouse’s friend into the divorce or blame our children if they’re not behaving the way we want them to or circumstances for not getting the raise but you know when you turn that mirror on yourself you really give yourself a chance to see some powerful insights.

 

Jim Rembach:    Yeah, but sometimes we don’t want that mirror to be able to look back at us. 

 

Wendy Keller:    Tough luck. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s true. 

 

Wendy Keller:    You want to grow or you want to sit there and whine. I was talking to my friend, Mark Victor Hansen, he wrote the Chicken Soup for the soul series of his buddy Jack, Jack’s a client, and I was complaining to Mark about something I was really angry about. In my publishing life that wasn’t going well and Mark listen basically probably to half of lunch and then he finally put his fork and he look me right in the eye and I’ll never forget this moment it changed my life he said, “Do you want to keep talking about the problem because we can or you could start to think about the solutions.” I’m like, oh, my god, I’m so embarrassed. And he was right.

 

Jim Rembach:    And I think for what you just said right there that’s often one of those mountains that we have to continually get over. It’s just that whole issue around keeping and bring it up and look in the past and reflect and be nostalgic instead of—my eyes are pointing out they’re not pointing in. 

 

Wendy Keller:    That’s true. Being reflective is a really important skill I think. People who waste years in therapy are waiting for the therapist to reflect back to them things as opposed to, and I’m not thinking therapies obviously helped me too and has helped a lot of people, but learning to journal or learning to be reflective or learning to meditate those factors certainly helped me enormously in my life. And I think they help anyone, men in our culture, particularly American culture, are socialized not to be reflective and some people don’t have that natural propensity because it wasn’t modeled for them in their youth but what a difference it can make even it was just subject-specific. Those who are entrepreneurs or those who are trying to overcome something usually we’re our own biggest obstacle. 

 

Jim Rembach:    So, when you start thinking about you had mention off mic that you’re getting ready to publish a brand-new book can you agree to tell for us please?  

 

Wendy Keller:    My newest book just came out it’s called The Ultimate Guide to Platform Building. It came out a couple of weeks ago and it’s doing great. It’s based on the consulting I do helping people build an enthusiastic and positive audiences that like them like and like their content. Whether you want to be a speaker or an author, a consultant or a doctor, an attorney, whatever. So, I’m really having fun promoting that book. I love helping people see how easy it is to find their personality and then match the platform building skills to that, just like you’re doing Jim, with the podcast this is for you. You’re good at it, you got it set up you got over 100 podcast. That’s fantastic that’s an important platform but that’s available for anybody who’s willing to take that first. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I know that for a lot of people like when we started the episode we are mentioning how they don’t take that step forward, how they’re fearful, and how they don’t look at the things of life that could be more devastating and they allow public speaking and getting themselves out there to be something that blocks them. What are some of the different pieces of advice that you would give somebody who is in that position? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Number one, go to our website and take a free quiz. There’s a quiz there that’s in tandem to my new book it’s at kellermedia.com /bizquiz. Keller Media is my last name. Go there and take that quiz and you’ll find out whether or not you even should be speaking. There are people who should not be speakers but that doesn’t mean you couldn’t do a podcast or start your own radio show or you would be okay standing in your living room in front of a video camera and starting a branded YouTube channel. There are billions and billions of ways at this time in history to really build out your success, your platform. You don’t have to be a speaker if it’s not what you want to do but there are permutations. If you really want to be a speaker for some reason and you don’t want to do keynotes like most of my clients do like Les Brown or Jet Hay Lead or you know I represent a labyrinth of the past president of the National Speakers Association, you don’t have to do that. 

 

You could do lectures, you could do trainings, you could do workshops, and you could be like my chiropractor and do ten people a month on a Wednesday night in your office. You could teach a class you could do adjunct teaching there’s all kinds of ways to do it if you want to do that but the great thing is there’s so many ways to build a platform. So, if you’re sitting they’re going, you know, I’m a little nervous about public speaking and I’m terrified this would be the worst thing ever because you probably will suck. But if you’re thinking, gosh, I’m a little bit nervous there are three things you can do right now that would make a difference in your ability to move forward as a public speaker. Number one is enroll yourself in a dance class. Performers have similar energy and speakers are performer energy. Enroll yourself in dance class, it’s not disco dancing where you’re dancing by yourself but dancing like waltzing and ballroom dancing or even a dance class like a jazz dance that’s where you’re dancing with the group even though you may not be touching one another that’s really important. If you don’t feel comfortable with that make the decision to take a comedy class. Every city in America probably has a comedy workshop, sign up for a comedy workshop even if it’s just a few weeks this will allow you to get out of yourself and move into a bigger space with your own sense of self. It’ll teach you to think on your feet if that’s not a natural aptitude for you. And if you don’t want to do dance and don’t want to do comedy other thing for you to do is sign up to speak. So, find a place that’s willing to bring you in, have it be at least a couple months from now weeks at the most at least a month or more from now would be ideal. And whether you’re going to give a lecture to the Ladies Auxiliary gardening club or you’re going to go be a guest lecturer at the local junior college it doesn’t matter that will force you, if you’re like me especially if you’re a deadline-driven person, it will force you to have something ready and do the best job you can and to find out if this is really the right destiny for you. Getting in front of people is how you get good at getting in front of people.

 

Jim Rembach:    Definitely practice and putting yourself out there. 

 

Wendy Keller:    Prepare and practice, yeah. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Makes it easier. So, when you started talking about the new book and all the work that you’re doing and all the clients that you’re representing, you talked about your daughter graduation in college, you got a lot of things going on and you always have a lot of things going on as you said, but if you think about all those things, what’s one of your goals?

 

Wendy Keller:    Oh, goal, personally or professionally? 

 

Jim Rembach:    Whichever comes to mind 

 

Wendy Keller:    Well I would say that my primary professional goal right now is to transition from the—the work we do—we represent a lot of brand-new authors, up-and-coming authors, I find that I have more value to give the world than just selling another 5 or 10 ten-thousand-dollar book. I have a lot of big clients but I also have this sense of service and responsibility because I have had the honor of 17 New York Times bestsellers—and so I’ve tried to sell smaller clients like, you know, at the $10, 000 level, and help them, grow themselves into becoming $100,000 clients where I’m actually making enough money to make it worth my time. I have that coterie but the majority of authors at this time in history are $10,000 or less. 

 

And so I don’t want to sell as many of those I want to use the platform book to really help people understand how a book is a component of a successful business marketing strategy not how it’s the only thing, I know your mom’s going to be real proud of you, but I don’t care unless I’m getting paid and you shouldn’t either. So I can teach you how to use a book to really grow your business, whatever your business is it doesn’t even matter what you want to do, you could be a dentist and I can show you how to use a book, publish yourself or self-published whatever to grow platform because that’s when passionate about. But I need to get out of doing the ten-thousand-dollar books we sold a bunch of those this year and it’s not helpful because the authors are not cute queued to be successful, so I’m actually hurting them by doing that and I feel I need to take responsibility. Unless they have a growing platform of fans they should not be doing a book and they as sure as heck should not be self-publishing. So, that’s a big important professional goal that I have this year. And my personal goal really this year includes taking better care of my mom. She’s getting older and it is time for me to step up as the oldest and as the only female child. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader Legion wishes you the very best. Now before we move on, let’s get a quick word from our sponsor. 

 

The number one thing that contributes to customer loyalty is emotions. So, move onward and upward faster by getting significantly deeper insight and understanding of your customer journey and personas with emotional intelligence. With your empathy mapping workshop you learn how to evoke and influence the right customer emotions that generate improved customer loyalty and reduce your cost to operate. Get over your emotional hump now by going to empathymapping.com learn more. 

 

Alright here we go Fast Leader Legion it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Wendy, the Hump Day Hoedown is a part of our show where you give us good insights fast so I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us a robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster. Wendy Keller, are you ready to hoedown?  

 

Wendy Keller:    Yes, I am. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright. What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today?  

 

Wendy Keller:    Time management strategies. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you have ever received? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Put yourself in the other person’s shoes every single time. Show more compassion.

 

Jim Rembach:    What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success? 

 

Wendy Keller:    I am a pitbull. If you like it, you want it, you take it, you put in your mouth and you hold on until you get it. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of the best tools that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Wendy Keller:    My absolute ability to learn anything new, technology, strategy, anything, I’m ready to learn. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book, other than your own of course and you several of those, that you would recommend to our listeners? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Web Copy That Sells by Maria Veloso, she happens to be our client but it is the best book on how to write any type of copy web or otherwise its focus on the other person’s actual needs. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Ok, Fast Leader listeners, you can find links to that and other bonus information from today’s show by going to fastleader.net/wendykeller. Okay, Wendy this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question? Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Thank you for that question. I would take back the ability to be humble and not only learn but also treat other people more kindly. Other people have gifts differing and I need to realize that not everyone can be coerced into a model that I would prefer. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Wendy, it was an honor to spend time with you today, can you please share with the Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you? 

 

Wendy Keller:    Great sure. We’re at kellermedia.com, stop on by. And if you are experiencing an emotional problem or challenge that you would like to connect with me, that’s under my eponymous website wendykeller.com. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Wendy Keller thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom the Fast Leader Legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot! Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster. 

 

END OF AUDIO

 

091: Wade Fransson: This is not the tent

Wade Fransson Show Notes

Wade Fransson was a junior in High School and spent ten months living in a tent through the Alaskan winter. Having to endure the cold winter by using a portable stove served to be too much for Wade when the stove blew up in his face. Listen to Wade tell his story of surviving and making a greater impact.

While most of us were born and raised somewhere, Wade Fransson struggles with how to answer this question. Born in Vancouver Canada, by the time he was 9 he had lived in three countries, and attended three different schools in California, Washington State and Sweden. This is a result of Wade’s unique background, which includes divorce, a domestic kidnapping, in which his father smuggled him out of the country, and an international legal battle which was eventually decided by the Supreme Court of Sweden.

All this, and much more, is detailed in his first book, The People of the Sign. The book ends in 1995 with his resignation from the WorldWide Church of God, but Wade’s life was really just beginning. His first inclination was to pursue teaching, and he spent 18 months in fourth and fifth grade classrooms while pursing those credentials. As much as Wade loved working with the children, he came to realize that to support his family in the way he hoped he would be forced to pursue administrative roles that held no appeal to him.

So he established a successful business, which became a springboard into the corporate world, where he held significant roles in noteworthy companies, while pursuing an MBA. Along the way he has continued to struggle with the integration of his prior beliefs, his desire to practice true religion, as defined by helping those in need, and his desire for material success. This struggle, which is common to all of us in one way or another, is documented in the sequel to The People of the Sign, titled The Hardness of the Heart.

Wade leveraged the fruits of his experience as a successful corporate executive to build and manage a small Real Estate Investment portfolio and establish the Internet Startup GoHuman.com.  More recently he established Something or other Publishing (SOOP), a groundbreaking company that combines the potential of Social Media and Self-Publishing in their Author Driven Publishing model.

Beyond his job as a manager if IT strategic sourcing at Kohl’s Department stores, Wade is also the Board Chair for the Virtues Project, a global grassroots movement working to integrate virtues unto all aspects of life.

Wade now lives in Madison, Wisconsin with his wife and two children, where he has successfully resisted all attempts to force him to add a dog to the family. But he confesses that it is “likely only a matter of time.”

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @wfransson and get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“Understand where the other person is at so you can convey your ideas.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet

“With people at odds against each other, do you think we could have positive progress?” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet

“Find some common ground or point of understanding to move forward.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“I try to build trust so that I become their ally rather than their enemy.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“My difficult negotiations are not with the other side, it’s with those internally.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“Science and religion can be integrated.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“Man became the most invasive species when it learned certain aspects of cooperation.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“To get people to broaden their worldview you have to understand where they’re coming from.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“My job is to create a competitive advantage with greater flow of value.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“Every time I do a deal I’m thinking competitive advantage.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“You take truthfulness and love and you’ve pretty much got it all wrapped up.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“My goal is to leave the world in a better place than I found it.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“There’s no better way to work on yourself than through the act of helping others.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“You really need to have a clear vision and establish the right culture to succeed.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“What is the real underlying issue, not the superficial answers?” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“We cannot achieve a fraction of what we could achieve through our own efforts.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

“Humility is what will enable other people to work with you.” -Wade Fransson Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Wade Fransson was a junior in High School and spent ten months living in a tent through the Alaskan winter. Having to endure the cold winter by using a portable stove served to be too much for Wade when the stove blew up in his face. Listen to Wade tell his story of surviving and making a greater impact.

Advice for others

It’s not a dog eat dog world.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

Struggling with baggage and its effect on interpersonal relationships. Working on stability and balance within myself.

Best Leadership Advice Received

It’s all about vision and setting the right culture.

Secret to Success

An analytical mind and unpacking a problem and getting to the core of the problem.

Best tools that helps in business or Life

The technical skills to learn and use tools better than most people.

Recommended Reading

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values

The Biology of Belief 10th Anniversary Edition: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter & Miracles

Contacting Wade

Website: http://wadefransson.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wadefransson

Twitter: https://twitter.com/wfransson

Resources

The People of the Sign
The Hardness of the Heart

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

091: Wade Fransson: This is not the tent

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

 

Need a powerful and entertaining way to ignite your next conference, retreat or team-building session? My keynote don’t include magic but they do have the power to help your attendees take a leap forward by putting emotional intelligence into their employee engagement, customer engagement and customer centric leadership practices. So bring the infotainment creativity the Fast Leader show to your next event and I’ll help your attendees get over the hump now. Go to beyondmorale.com/speaking to learn more.

 

Okay Fast Leader legion, today, this episode has been in the making for a long time I’m glad we’re finally having it. The person I have on this episode today is one of those folks that the more I get to know about them the more fascinated that I am and the more that they impact my life. While most as were born and raise somewhere, Wade Fransson struggles with how to answer this question. Born in Vancouver, Canada by the time he was nine he had lived in three countries and attended three different schools in California, Washington State and Sweden. This is the result of Wade’s unique background which includes divorce, a domestic kidnapping in which his father smuggled him out of the country and an international legal battle which was eventually decided by the Supreme Court of Sweden. All this and much more is detailed in his first book, The People of the Sign. The book ends in 1995 with the resignation from the World Wide Church of God, but Wade’s life was really just beginning.

 

His first inclination was to pursue teaching and he spent 18 months and fourth and fifth grade classes while pursuing those credentials. As much as Wade loved working with the children, he came to realize that to support his family in the way that he hoped, he would be forced to pursue administrative roles that held no appeal to him. So, he established a successful business which became a springboard into the corporate world where he held significant roles in noteworthy companies while pursuing an MBA. Along the way he has continued to struggle with the integration of his prior beliefs, his desire to practice true religion as defined by helping those in need and his desire for material success. The struggle which is common to all of us in one way or another is documented in the sequel to The People of the Sign, titled The Hardiness of the Heart.

 

Wade leverage the fruits of his experience as a successful corporate executive to build and manage a small real estate investment portfolio and establish the Internet start-up gohuman.com More recently he established something or other publishing soup a groundbreaking company that combines the potential of social media and self-publishing in their author driven publishing model. Beyond his job as a manager of IT strategic sourcing at Cole’s Department store’s, Wade is also the Board Chair of the Virtues Project, a global grassroots movement working to integrate virtues into all aspects of life. Wade now lives in Madison, Wisconsin with his wife and two children where he had successfully resisted all attempts to force them to add a dog to the family but he confesses that is likely only a matter of time. Wade Fransson are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Wade Fransson:    Absolutely, Jim, thank you so much for having me on this program. I’m really looking forward to it.

 

Jim Rembach:    And I am too. I’m glad to your finally here. I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you but can you tell us which are current passion is so that we get to know you even better? 

 

Wade Fransson:    My current passion really relies on all of those experiences that you just listed out and trying to integrate them, as I think you hinted at it into a coherent vision and view for humanity in which people can self-actualize in a way that contributes to overall society as well as striving more transcendent goals including spiritual goals that are often neglected in our westerns society and integrates all these things as you pointed out is actually quite challenging.

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks for sharing that. You’re talking about the challenging piece and even for me getting to know you more over the past couple of years now, is that, being able to think creatively in that way and convey it in a manner by which it doesn’t cause people to go “huh” is difficult. So, how do you actually make or as I may say it makes sense to you, how do you help others make sense of what you’re thinking and the vision that you have so that things move forward and people just don’t get confused?

 

Wade Fransson:    The hardest part there is really understanding where that other person is at. And getting to understand what it is that they’re looking at and how they might be able to understand some of the things that you wish to convey to them. If you’re talking this broad kind of integrated approach, it does somebody have a belief in a higher power or not and somebody believes that money and wealth are evil, or somebody believes that the biggest problem on the planet is global warming or does somebody believe that the biggest problem planet is the lack of energy. Understanding where people are coming from is the first most important point in order to build a bridge to help them understand what it is that you wished to convey to them. 

 

Jim Rembach:    You know that’s a very interesting concept that you’re talking about. And while I do spend a lot of time and effort both in my job as well as personally trying to craft messages that other people need to hear, now what I need to say there’s a difference there, not what I need to say but what other people need to hear. And the way that you just very quickly were able to identify where people are coming from, to me in itself is quite unique. I know for me I would use some of that for my own benefit, thank you for sharing. To be able to draw and create that connection with folks more rapidly so that hopefully we can get to doing things faster, we’re talking about moving onward and upward faster with the fast leader show.

 

Wade Fransson:    Look at one of the biggest challenges facing this nation and as the historical leader of the free world thus facing the entire world is the enormous and unbelievable polarization that’s happening in this country as typified by this year’s election cycle. Now with people that much at odds against each other, do you think we can have any positive progress in the world? Absolutely not. People are no willing to take each other down at any and all costs and it’s quite challenging then to be able to address people on both sides and not be painted black or white by either side in such a way that you could help them find some common ground, some point of understanding, in which we could forward on any topic or as a people or as a nation or on whatever it is that you wish to discuss. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s a very interesting point that you share. Let’s talk a little bit about some of the work that you do at Cole’s from a strategic sourcing perspective ‘cause I think it’s important in a lot of different ways to tour audience. A lot of the folks that listen to the show may have to go through a by-process in order to get solutions. And so that they have to build business cases. They have to present their ideas and try to get all of those things, so they have to coordinate a cross-multiple departments. They’re all ultimately trying to impact customer experience and make more sales, build their brands all those types of things. Now, when you start talking about the vast—just ideas and thoughts of all the things that you’re involved in—that’s one issue. But in order to move things forward and work across all these different departments and talk about strategic sourcing for such a huge organization for me I have to deal procurement people, right? And they have no the reputation of being….

 

Wade Fransson:    My condolences.

 

Jim Rembach:    Well, yeah, giving  me some empathy for that is appreciated. But how do you bring those two sides together where you got your internal stakeholders and that external vendor to get to the point where you can find an agreement? 

 

Wade Fransson:    That’s a fascinating question and one reason that I love what I call “my day job.” First of all why do it? Well, it pays the bills and it funds my other activities. Because I’m quite well compensated given that I am often negotiating deals in north of a hundred million dollars and you can imagine the dynamics in deals that large. So, I frequently get told by the people on the other side of the table that they’ve never met anybody like me in the procurement world, which I take as compliment. And that what I try to do is first and foremost build trust with them that I become their friend and ally rather than their enemy. The reasons that’s really challenging is because my own side doesn’t want that they want me to return every time with him blood on my knuckles and a few scalps showing them what I’ve done for them. And if I comeback with work pays on they’re going to say, “What the heck are you doing? You’re off the reservation here you should be fighting for us not chumming it with this guys, they’re not your friends.” And within our company, I’m likely in trouble for saying this but there’s this view that says, we should approach them as not our friends and you must fight and win, kind of thing. 

 

And I keep trying to tell my internal stakeholders, “No, that’s not how I get what Cole’s needs.” I don’t mind sharing this, I share this with the people that I work with on the other side table I’m trying to coach you out on a limb and then hold up the saw. I much rather get you to extend yourself way beyond what you would normally do in trust that I’m going to help you, and how do I do that? Again getting back to that PowerPoint I first say, “What it is that’s important to you in this?” Oftentimes something is very important to them that cost us almost nothing to give them and we can exchange that, that’s a really, really good horse trade, but oftentimes my side is like, “why should we give that to them” because this is antagonistic relationship like, “why shouldn’t we give it to them? Don’t you want a long-term strategic partnership with his company that you’re outsourcing $112 million worth of business to? Of course you do”. My difficult negotiations are not with those on the other side of the table, my difficult negotiations are with those internally to get—the person I’m supposed to be fighting with what they want. 

 

Jim Rembach:    That’s very enlightening in a lot of ways. I used to work for a large retailer. And I had the opportunity to spend some time in the in the buying department of different product lines that we sold within our stores. I had the experience of just witnessing some conversations from buyers that was just so nasty, where it was, give me everything and you’ll be left with nothing, and for my perspective we been taught as kids—you get more by being kind and nice and offering the candy and not being no ugly and nasty. How does that change?

 

Wade Fransson:    It gets to the heart and core of what I call the reptilian brainstem despite light syndrome that’s hardwired into our DNA. But again my interests are broad so I recently read in scientific American an article about man as a species becoming the most invasive species the planet has ever known and I tie there things in with my spiritual understanding going back to the book of Genesis and understanding how does this tie in with the Adam and Eve story which most consider just a fable that has no basis in any kind of fact. And I actually find ways to integrate this very divergent views, science and religion can be integrated, can be understood as united. So, anyway, man becoming the most invasive species, lo and behold man became the most invasive species when it learned certain aspects of cooperation. And this is in evidence in hunting facts whether the wolves or the orca whales that managed to excel as a species because they’ve learned certain elements of cooperation. You know, we often hear about dog eat dog but in nature dogs don’t actually eat dogs and yet that is fundamentally a world view that we have, oh, it’s a dog eat dog world. Really? In what sense has it ever been a dog eat dog world? When in history has a dog ever eaten a dog? And yet that idea influences our thinking and our actions in so many ways, it’s just insane. And yet that’s trying to coach somebody else out on a limb away from their minds and in their thinking to get them to broaden their world. You have to understand where they’re coming from and what silly, or ridiculous, or insane ideas occupied their thinking. And try to help create a crack and little light in on that. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks for sharing that. As you were talking I even start thinking about my experiences with customer service just the other day for example. I see the connection, hopefully others will, is that I receive an offer via e-mail about receiving in a subscription that I have for some backup software an extra month of I signed up and I went through the process and for whatever reason the transaction didn’t go through, never got a notice of it otherwise but then I kept getting an expiration notice. And so I called them up and said, “What happened? As far as I know I paid for this.” And they said, “Oh, we see that the transaction didn’t go through, we can explain why.” And I said, well—she goes, but I’ll do it for you now. I said, “Okay.” So, then she started giving me the offer without the free month. And I said, “Wait a minute, I got an offer for a free month.” And she goes, “Well, go back through and click that e-mail” When I did it said, “This link is expired.” And I said, “Can you just go ahead and give me that….hold on one moment I need to get the supervisor’s approval.” Why did I have to spend an extra couple minutes and then you spend in the supervisor’s time just to give me one darn extra month which I already have an e-mail we confirm but it goes back to what we’re talking about is doggy dog, I’m giving you this—it’s policy—and it’s amazing what we’ve done to one another just from a customer service and customer care world with that type of thought process and mindset. 

 

Wade Fransson:    In going back again to how these things are integrated. So, I’ve created a model which I would love to publish sometime if I ever have the time to write a book about procurement and sourcing and doing deals and negotiations. I view the service provider network, the vendors those partners as a different species. They’ve grown up in a different ecosystem. They’re successful, we want to do business with them and because they’re successful they’re one of the best companies, we love them, whatever is it they’ve created, whatever value they have, they hold out for us. But they’ve developed that in a slightly different ecosystem, they are different species. And we as the customer we’re successful in our world they want to do business with us but we’re different species. So here are these barriers even at the cellular level a single celled mechanism has a semi-permeable membrane through which things come in and out of the organism. And the between DNA and RNA is critical and important that there’s a book of biology of belief that would claim this that will blow your mind and change your opinion about what you are genetically capable of or not capable of and the power of your thinking and choice to re-create yourself into something much grander.

 

Anyway, that semi-permeable membrane so Lex what it leds in or leds out and this single cell then develops and become the species that’s selectively protects itself the flight light syndrome hardwired into our DNA. We can override that and we can form a relationship in which we move the friction between the flow of value between these two species and now two species that essentially would be competing with each other and would be protecting themselves and defensive and trying to win it can suddenly become symbiotic and the flow of value can be much faster. So what I tell the vendors typically is at some point in the negotiation here’s my goal, you currently have our competitors as your customer, my job is to create a competitive advantage in that, I don’t care what your relationship is with our competitor you can have it because I’m going to create something that exceeds that the full value between you and us will exceed the flow of value between you and our competition based on this agreement that we’re going to reach, contract that we’re going to put in place to document it and that every time I do a deal I’m thinking competitive advantage, competitive advantage, my relation with IBM, my relationship with Microsoft, my relationship with Google is better, stronger, faster than their relationship with any of my competitors. So, in my little piece of the cold world in my little procurement role, I’m aligned with the top line vision of the company and I’m helping us achieve the competitive advantage and that what excites me about going into work every day. And it integrates with my thinking around, how can I be better human being, how can I have better friendships with people, and relationship with people, so that’s who and what I am and that’s how I roll, for better or worse.

 

Jim Rembach:    It’s definitely a unique situation when you talk about somebody who’s in a procurement world and I think anybody who’s ever dealt with procurement will see that. Your diverse background and a lot of the things that you had exposure to, your own continued effort to try to find this connection both spiritually and physically, there’s going to be so much inspirations that you have and we like to share quotes on the show, is there one that just stands out for you that you can share?

 

Wade Fransson:    There’s so many but I’m going to share two.  The first one is related to my role as chairperson of the Virtues Project international Association, this global grassroots movement that was endorsed by the United Nations and that has curriculum that’s being used in school systems in a variety of countries. And one of the quotes related to that that I love is by a man named `Abdu’l-Bahá, whom some may know, I’m actually a Bahai religiously today and `Abdu’l-Bahá is known as the master or the exemplar, the perfect example of following the teachings. 

 

His code is “Truthfulness is the foundation of all human virtues” and this of course integrates with this, “Search for truth, being truthful in your discussions with anybody else.” So, truthfulness is the foundation of all human virtues. And as a former Christian minister and one who believes that Jesus Christ is everything he said he was, everything that he revealed about himself is absolutely true, people just don’t know what that was, I don’t understand what that was, but he said, “To be a follower of Christ, the sign of somebody who actually follows Christ is quite simple, John 13:35, “By this shall all men know you that you have love one for another.” So you want to find people who are truly following Christ it’s people who exemplify love to each other. So you take truthfulness and love and you’re pretty much guided all wrapped up. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Simple plain truth. Alright, I know that there’s so many different fascinating stories like I had said is more I get to know you there’s more that I learn—I think people would make that reference about peeling back the onion I think you have unlimited layers. We all’ve had to get over humps, you went over several even as a child when you had not had no control over any of that, is there one that can stands out to you that’s really made that huge impact that you can share? 

 

There is absolutely. So, the moment that I’ve repeated to myself in difficult situations is, “This is not it is not the tent.” And what that means to me is, when I was at junior in high school after all these really traumatic situations that I was all emotionally wrapped around the axle because of what it occurred, what had been done to me the fact that authorities had lied to me and manipulated me and there was nobody I could trust. And then between my Junior and Senior of high school my dad decided he’s going to build a house on a piece of land where there was no water or electricity and unfortunately this land was in Alaska so I ended up living it a tent for 10 months through the Alaskan winter in 20 below weather. 

 

And going to school, I had, Jim, class first thing in the morning and I would try to get a shower. I’d come out and my clothes would stink and smell like smoke, I was tent boy at school in addition to having to survive living in a tent. While in that tent, I have this stove that I try to use to heat up the tent, of course you would go out in the middle of the night so it help and it didn’t help. And I had that stove blow up in my face and it burn off an entire layer of skin, which was not only excruciating it was terrifying and then I went into hypothermia as result of this and blah, blah, blah. So, that was an absolute low point. So, from time to time in my life I’ve said this is not a tent, I would get through this. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Wow, great story. And I think we all can relate to that in one way or the other. Now, we talked about many of the things that you’re involved in, from the self-publishing platform to of course working at Coles, being a father, your faith and also the Virtues Project, you’ve got tons of things. So, I still can understand how you get things to move forward, but that’s yet for another show. But if you start looking at a lot of these things, even maybe that we haven’t covered yet, what one of your goals? 

 

Wade Fransson:    My goal is to absolutely leave the world a better place than I found it. In all my interactions and everything I do and yeah it does absolutely focus on my children. My daughter is now eight and I looked at her the other day and I realized this is the age of my little sister when we came back from Sweden. And my little sister had forgotten English completely. When we were smuggled out of the country, we were split up to live with three sets of aunts and uncles. And we were totally immersed in Swedish society and we lost all sense of who our family was. And when we were reunited with our mother, my little sister can communicate with her because my mother can speak Swedish and Lisa didn’t speak English at that time. And mother was also an alcoholic at that time and so that made it even worse. 

 

So, looking at my daughter at age eight I’m thinking the investment that I’m making in my children, and I was on the school board for three years as well as on Montessori school where they go and totally sold on that program as far as an educational platform for people. Knowing that my children have just so much more of a foundation than I had and yeah, you can survive that tent and that stove blowing up in your face. But you’re scarred in a number of ways. And you have so much baggage and you can spend your whole life just working on yourself to get yourself to a place where you can be healthy and survive and much of my life were spent getting to place where I can be healthy and survive. But I’m hopeful that my children will have all that dial by the time they hit adolescence, they’ll already be out serving community in ways that it took me four years to figure out how to serve humanity. My desire was to serve humanity but in the typical social workers syndrome often the people doing social work have more problems than the people they are trying to help. I hate to say that as a sort of a blanket characterization, but it’s true. It’s not a c criticism of them, I admire and applaud them for working on themselves through the act of helping others, there’s no better way to work on yourself. But imagine if you start from a position of strength rather than one of weakness with the right intent, how much more you can actually (25:08 inaudible)

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader legion wishes you the very best. Now before we move on let’s get a quick word from our sponsor.

 

The number one thing that contributes to customer loyalty is emotions. So, move onward and upward faster by getting significantly deeper insight and understanding of your customer journey personas with emotional intelligence. With your entity mapping workshop you’ll learn how to evoke and influence the right customer emotions that generate improve customer loyalty and reduce your cost operate. Get over your emotional hump now by going to empathymapping.com to learn more. 

 

Alright here we go Fast Leader listeners, it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Wade, the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster. Wade Fransson, are you ready to hoedown?

 

Wade Fransson:    I am ready.

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright.  What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today?

 

Wade Fransson:    I still struggle with all that baggage and interpersonal relationships, still catch myself acting in ways that I’m not proud of based on not having really gotten stability and balance within myself.

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you have ever received?

 

Wade Fransson:    That’s a tough one.  I think in terms of leadership, it’s all about vision. It’s all about setting the culture. You really need to have a clear vision and establish the right culture to succeed. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success. 

 

Wade Fransson:    An analytical mind. Just unpacking of problem asking why five times and getting to the bottom of what is the real underlying issue here.  Now taking superficial answers not dealing with symptoms, getting to the core of the problem. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of your best tools that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Wade Fransson:    This isn’t exactly the tool but it’s an example of the tool. When I was in high school I learn how to type and what I mean by that is it’s a technical skill, I type 81 words a minute and when I learned to use Microsoft Word or Microsoft Excel really learning to use a tool really well. How do I accomplish things across all of these methods? I know how to use the tools to get things done in a fraction of the time that it takes other people to get them done. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book that you’d recommend to our listeners, they could be from any genre?

 

Wade Fransson:    Well, mine of course, but other than that, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance was a seminal book for me that helped educate me on philosophy, human relations, and just was a fascinating read. I tried to pattern my book a little bit—my first book a little bit on the model of the way that Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance is written. It’s not what you think from the title, amazing book.

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader listeners you’ll find links to that and bonus information from today show by going to fastleader.net/wadefransson and will put links to Wade’s books as well. Okay, Wade, this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything back you can only choose one, what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why? 

 

Wade Fransson:    Humility. I would take humility because we cannot possibly achieve even a fraction of what we could achieve through our own efforts, and humility is what will enable other people to want to work with you. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Wade is was an honor to spend time with you today. Can you please share with the Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you? 

Wade Fransson:    Sure. Wade Fransson I’m the only Wade Fransson know to Google, my name doesn’t sound that unique but it is. So just Google me and any site will come up, my books, my website, wadefransson.com, probably my publishing company. You can also just get me at wade@soopllc.com.

 

Jim Rembach:    Wade Fransson, thank you for sharing her knowledge and wisdom the Fast Leader Legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot! Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster. 

 

END OF AUDIO

 

 

088: Jocelyn Davis: I no longer had a platform

Jocely Davis Show Notes

Jocelyn Davis got a splash of cold water in her face. Being an executive at a consulting firm she was easily published by Harvard Business Press. But when she tried to get her next book published after departing from her firm she learn a sobering lesson. Listen to Jocelyn tell the story of her journey of getting over the hump.

Jocelyn Davis grew up in a Foreign Service family and at last count she has lived in 29 neighborhoods and 8 countries. Some of the places she has lived include: Dar es Salaam, Tanzania; Kingston, Jamaica; Newport, Rhode Island; Vientiane, Laos; Pittsburgh, PA; Panama City; Boston, Mass; and Toronto, Canada.

After college Jocelyn planned to be an academic. But she didn’t like grad school, so she took off for Los Angeles (having picked up an M.A. in philosophy and my husband-to-be; we are about to celebrate our 27th anniversary) and got a job in publishing. In 1989 they moved to Boston and she answered a classified ad for a copyeditor at The Forum Corporation, a leadership- and sales-training firm. At that time, she’d never heard of the corporate learning industry.

Jocelyn stayed with Forum for 20 years, working her way up to become EVP, R&D. Her team was responsible for developing all the standard training products. One of her proudest achievements there was co-authoring her first book, Strategic Speed (HBR Press), which argues that fast execution is all about the people stuff.

Today, Jocelyn is an independent consultant and author. Her passions are helping others learn and grow, leading creative teams, writing books, designing learning programs, and working at the intersection of business and the humanities.

When she left Forum, she had a vision of a consulting business built on the idea of leadership as a liberal art. She thought, hey, I’ll write a book to support the business. Turned out, the book became the business! It’s called The Greats on Leadership (Hachette UK)—it’s 25 centuries of the best ideas for leaders, featuring great thinkers and storytellers like Plato, Shakespeare, C.G. Jung, Jane Austen, and lots more.

Jocelyn lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico, with her husband Matt and daughter Emily.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @JocelynRDavis and over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet 

“The farther backward you can look, the farther forward you can see.” Churchill by Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet

“Often people are a little too eager to be forward thinking and innovative.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet

“When you look backwards it’s all there to be learned from.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“A great leader can come from anywhere.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“You don’t need status in the hierarchy in order to lead.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“Today, there are so many different ways to be successful.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“Having a child is one of the greatest leadership learning experiences.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“If you’re a leader you’ve got to get comfortable with talking to your monsters.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“When things go wrong, remember it’s about helping the other person.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

“This is not about me; I need to focus on that other person.” -Jocelyn Davis Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Jocelyn Davis got a splash of cold water in her face. Being an executive at a consulting firm she was easily published by Harvard Business Press. But when she tried to get her next book published after departing from her firm she learn a sobering lesson. Listen to Jocelyn tell the story of her journey of getting over the hump.

Advice for others

Find a way to be okay, but never give up.

Holding her back from being an even better leader

My extremely introverted personality.

Best Leadership Advice Received

Of the master when his work is done, his tasks fulfilled, the people will say we did it ourselves.

Secret to Success

I do things that scare me. I made a vow to not let things that scare me stop me.

Best tools that helps in business or Life

My daughter. She is not really a tool but I think that being a parent is one of the greatest leadership experiences one could ever have.

Recommended Reading

Strategic Speed: Mobilize People, Accelerate Execution

The Greats on Leadership: Classic Wisdom for Modern Managers

Frankenstein

Contacting Jocelyn

Website: https://jocelynrdavis.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jocelyn-davis-a0b9868

Twitter: https://twitter.com/JocelynRDavis/

Resources

54 Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Competencies List: Emotional Intelligence has proven to be the right kind of intelligence to have if you want to move onward and upward faster. Get your free list today.

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

088: Jocelyn Davis: I no longer had a platform

 

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

 

Need a powerful and entertaining way to ignite your next conference, retreat or team-building session? My keynote don’t include magic but they do have the power to help your attendees take a leap forward by putting emotional intelligence into their employee- engagement, customer-engagement and customer-centric leadership practices. So bring the infotainment creativity the Fast Leader show to your next event and I’ll help your attendees get over the hump now. Go to beyondmorale.com/speaking to learn more.

 

Okay Fast Leader Legion today I’m excited because I have somebody on the show today that gives a fresh perspective on some classic leaders. Jocelyn Davis grew up in a Foreign Service family and at last count she’s lived in 29 neighborhood and eight countries. Some of the places she had lived are Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, Kingston, Jamaica, New Port Rhode Island, Vientiane, Laos, Pittsburg, Pennsylvania, Panama City, Florida, Boston, Massachusetts and Toronto, Canada. After college Jocelyn plan to be an academic but she didn’t like grad school so she took off to Los Angeles taking her soon to be husband with her and got a job in publishing. 

 

In 1989 they move to Boston and she answered the classified ad for a copy editor at the Forum Corporation, a leadership and sales training firm, at that time she’d never heard of the corporate learning industry. Jocelyn stayed at Forum for 20 years, working her way up to become the Executive Vice President of Research and Development. Her team was responsible for developing all the standard training products. One of her proudest achievements there was co-authoring her first book, Strategic Speed published by Harvard Business Review Press, which argues that fast execution is all about the people stuff, Huh! doesn’t that  sound interesting? Today, Jocelyn is an independent consultant and author. Her passions are helping others learning grow, leading creative teams, writing books, designing learning programs and working at the intersection of business and the humanities. When she left Forum, she had a vision of a consulting business built on the idea of leadership as a liberal art. She thought, Hey! I’ll write a book to support the business, it turn out the book became the business, it’s called The Greats on Leadership, it’s 25 centuries of the best ideas for leaders featuring great thinkers and storytellers like Plato, Shakespeare, CZ Zhong, Jane Austin and lots more. Jocelyn lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico with her husband Matt and daughter Emily. Jocelyn Davis are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    I am Jim, thank you. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks for being here. Now, I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you but can you tell us what you’re current passion is so that we can get to know you even better?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Sure. My current passion is, well you already mentioned it, it’s this new book that I just came out with, The Greats on Leadership and that’s what I’m all about at the moment it’s really about ticking that book out to leaders out there in the world of all stripes and helping them become better leaders with some of these ideas and great stories from ages past. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Now, one of the things that I found interesting is that—we often talk about history and why do we study history so that we don’t repeat the same mistakes cause that’s what’s we’re supposed to be doing as one of our main objectives for learning history. But when I started think about these classic leaders of leadership it’s like I would asked myself, how can we haven’t figure all the stuff out already?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah, good question. The book starts out with a quote from Winston Churchill, he was a great leader and a great writer, great author and he said: The further backwards you can look the farther forward you’re likely to see. I really believe that’s true and I think the answer to your question why haven’t we figure it out yet is because I think often everybody is a little too eager to be forward thinking and innovative and that’s what you’re supposed to be as a business person, is always looking for what’s coming down the pike but we sometimes forget that when we look backwards you look at everything that’s happened and this great thinkers and this great ideas and stories from the past it’s all there. It’s all there to be learned from, it’s all there to be gleaned, so I think we often forget to do that and we should. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Sometimes  that look back could prevent us from taking a step forward if we don’t have some type of confidence in that step that we take and we have to have some boldness in a lot of the innovation of today is not occurring because of fear and not taking that step forward. When you start talking about looking at some of these classic leaders and having that boldness grit some of that foresight to be able to know when to go, where do you find it when you’re looking back?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah, yeah, great question. It’s actually one of the main themes in the book. This idea a great leader can come from anywhere. That you don’t need a big title or thousands of followers on Twitter or the corner office, you don’t need that sort of trappings of success or that status if you are on a hierarchy in order to lead. And I’m really pretty passionate about getting this message out to people and I think you learn this from looking back at not just great leaders of the past but great thinkers, great masterminds of the past. Because you see that they’re not talking about as CEO, that’s pretty recent invention—the CEO the modern day organization is only maybe a 100 years old. So, you look back at this great stories and you see all kinds of people, people of different genders and tribes and personalities and there’s just these great stories and ideas that anybody can really latch on to and feel great about the impact that they’re already making as a leader and then maybe try to do even a little bit more.

 

Jim Rembach:    As you were talking, I started thinking about too as I myself has studied—I wouldn’t necessarily say leaders but studied some folks that today we essentially revere as famous during their day and age and their time they may have been so far out in front of the conventional wisdom and thinking that they’re almost ostracized. So when you were going and doing your research, were you finding that there are certain leaders that at that time when they were alive they weren’t considered leaders however posthumously all of the sudden gain this leadership wisdom?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah that’s interesting. There were many authors that I’ve looked at are famous today and I was intentionally going for that, for people who are well-known—Shakespeare and Plato and Churchill we all know those names, but then I also found a few authors, thinkers that are not well known at all today. And one of them is this guy named Theodore Dodge, he was a colonel in the civil era was in the United States and then he became a university professor after that. He wrote this book or series of essays called, The Great Captain, it’s about the great war leaders of the past like Alexander the Great and Caesar and Hannibal, and so Theodore Dodge—he’d been a soldier then became an academic, nobody’s ever heard of him he’s an obscure historian but I put him in my book because he has this great, concise stories of these great captains of Hannibal and how he beat the Romans and Alexander the Great and what he did. It’s interesting I think sometimes we have to look to the lesser known, not just leaders but the lesser known thinkers and people who had looked back at these great leaders and had written about and pay attention to what they said.

 

Jim Rembach:    I think great you bring up a really interesting point on one of the things about the Fast Leader show is that there’s leaders amongst us, they’re all over the place and the beauty about what I get to do on the Fast Leader show is highlight those folks and the things that they’ve learned so that they can teach us all. And thanks for being one of those folks are here because I think you just saying and pointing that out about Dodge is critically important. And I know it may not seem so related but to me I think it kind of fit and this is just my oddball way of thinking, there was something I was reading talking about the types of apples that we eat and just like the—only a 150, 200 years ago there were like 200 or 300 varieties and because of us only focusing on one or two there’s really only eight varieties that are currently really farmed, it’s really small so it’s really amazing what we’ve done and so I think that we can actually enrichen and deepen our bounty if we seek and look for those lesser-known leaders like you’re talking  about and thanks for bringing them to life through your book, I appreciate that.

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah, absolutely.

 

Jim Rembach:    Now I know as doing—research and looking at these classics and looking at things that are not as known you probably have come across tons of different quotes and we love those on the Fast Leader show because they will help to inspire us and do a lot of different things. But is there one or two that kind of stands out for you that you can share with us?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah. There’s one quote that I came across several years ago by Maya Angelo, who’s a great poet. She was a poet laureate probably in United States for a while’s and what she said—said a lot of great things but the quote of hers that’s my favorite is: “They’ll forget what you said, they’ll forget what you did but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.” When I first hear that quote it just took the top my head off cause I was like, ‘Wow! That is profound.” Because that just says so much about how—leaders make this mistake often, I make this mistake of thinking that, Oh, everybody is paying attention to what I’m saying, and they’re paying attention to what I’m doing, and I got to be really good and say all these good stuff and do all this good stuff, but really what that quote says to me is that, nobody’s going to remember any of that and I’m relate them and remember a bit of it, but really what they remember is how you made them feel. Did you inspire? Did you encourage? Did you make people feel like they could be leaders? Did you make them feel good? Or did you make them feel like crap? That’s what it really comes down to when you’re talking leadership. So, I try to remember that quote. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I think that’s a good point as far as it’s something that it always has to be brought back into the forefront of our mind because it is so easy to lose sight of that. Thank you for sharing that. You and I had the opportunity to chat about a couple of different things previously and I really enjoyed getting to meet you and know more about you. We talked about humps and we talked about a couple of different humps amongst ourselves. Is there a story that you can share with us that will help us get in a better direction like it did for you? Can you share that?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Yeah, I’m happy to no question in my mind when you said share a story of hump where a challenge or struggle. There’s one story that immediately comes to mind for me which is the story of how I got fired from the company that I had worked for 20+ years and then went on to get past that and move on to other things but the interesting thing about that whole experience, one of the many interesting thing, is that I had written a book at that company several years back and I was really proud and pleased with that book, Strategic Speed it’s called and you mentioned that earlier, I was reading up to this issue where, and you Jim came in, so things weren’t right and I end up getting fired for insubordination of all things which is I kind of feel proud of that now because I’m not a very insubordinate person and the fact that I got fired for insubordination is sort of makes me truckle a little bit. But leading up to that point I was—I was an executive, I was head of R & D, I’ve written this book—co-authored this book,  and it was very easy to get that book published and I thought at that time, “Oh, it’s because it’s such a great book and Harvard Business Press loved it. It is a good book I think and I’m sure they did love it but what sort of a rude awakening for me after I got shown the door was that I realized when I decided to write my next book, I realize pretty quickly that I no long had a platform. I no longer was an executive at a consulting firm with a platform that would allow me to quickly sell another book. So it was a real cold water in the face for me I guess, because I left and I was like—oh, you know, no problem okay about…the fire that’s kind of drag, but it’s okay because I’m going to go on and write my next book and have my own business and be independent. 

 

But I quickly discovered that as I started to try to sell this next book to publishers that they we’re like well you know, who are you? You’re not famous, you’re not an executive with the company anymore so you don’t have what they call a platform. So, I had to really sort of take a step back and say, “Okay, what am I going to do here? Am I going to persist and try to build that credibility, kind of do it on my own really do it on my own. I thought I had done it on my own before but I really hadn’t, I had done it based on being a part of this company and having this title. And I realize that I no longer have that title, I no longer have that platform so I was going to have to do it based on other things like just being really, really persistent and resilient I guess. So, that’s what I did and it took me two years to write the book and two years to sell it. So I was writing and selling, trying to sell all along to that whole period and really the answer at the end of the day was that sheer persistence, thinking, realizing that I was going to get a lot of no’s but eventually I would get a yes, and eventually I did get a yes, so that’s’ my hump.

 

Jim Rembach:    Thanks for sharing that and I know—you and I had kind of talked about  how a lot of those things had strung together in regards to you being terminated and then trying to get the book sold and one of the things that you didn’t share that you shared with me is that there was a lot of rejection along the way. It wasn’t a situation where you continued to beat the pavement on trying to get that thing published. And a lot of people probably sitting there saying, Gosh! It’s easy all you have to do is just self-publish. But that’s not as easy as it seems to be either there’s a lot of a romantic thoughts about the of the whole self-publishing concept but it still comes down to if you want to sell you still have to have the platform. But traditional publishers as well as self-publishing the difference between a book that is recognized and one that isn’t comes down to the marketing and promotion aspects. The traditional publishing houses they’re not good promoters and marketers that’s still left to the person who writes the book even though it may have gotten published.

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Right. That’s right. And funny because I know you’re going to ask about an epiphany that I had in connection with this this story. And the epiphany that I had was actually related to what you’ve just said about self-publishing because you’re right I got so many rejections. I even went out to get a literary agent, first I thought I could do it on my own, go directly to publishers that didn’t work so I got a literary agent, that’s the whole process filled with rejection in itself. But eventually made it through that, I got the agent. And then thought, hurray, I made it now I’ve got an agent now it’s smooth sailing, but my agent was not able to sell the book either so that again another huge splash of cold water in the face. So then the epiphany for me came after my agent said, “You know what I don’t think we’re going to be successful in selling this book” so no hard feelings and we parted ways. 

 

And I thought to myself, “You know what, I’m going to keep trying, I’m going to keep trying to get a tradition publisher but I also realized that if I needed to self-publish then I was going to be absolutely okay with that. So there were sort of a mental shift and I really think this says something about, acceptance or just really being okay with wherever you are right now because I remember thinking to myself, “You know what, I’m may have to end up self-publishing this book and if I do that is absolutely okay because I believe in the book, I believe in what I’ve done, I know I can do and it, I know I can get out there and it’ll be okay. And I think that somehow that sort of made the universe, this is sound crazy but I think this sort of made the universe shift a little bit because the next day I went back and I Google self-publishers and hybrid publishers and little publishers, independent publishers and I was just Googling around and I came across this two British based publishers that just sort of there was something about them that I find, “aha, this seem like they’re my people.” So I reached out to them and almost immediately got responses back from both of them saying ‘yes we’re interested, we’d like to see a proposal and then went forward with Nicholas Brealy which was the one that ended up really, really liking the book a lot, and the rest was history. And then they published it and then were bought by Hashet, which is one of the big five publishers so that was fortuitous. But the point is just my epiphany was realizing that at some time in a process like this you have to just make peace with what you’ve done and whether or not anybody buys it, whether or not anybody gives you money for it you need to be okay with what you’ve done. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I think finding that place as well as you also had the persistence to keep going. You found a place but you still kept going so it wasn’t like you use it as an approval to quit, so good for you. 

 

Jocelyn Davis:    That’s right, exactly. It wasn’t about saying okay, I’m okay and now I quit it was just that you know I’m going to keep going and whatever happens it’ll be okay.

 

Jim Rembach:    Yeah. I think that’s a really important thing to point out here, don’t give yourself the okay to qui because time and time again when you start looking at a lot of people who have found success is because of the persistence piece it is not because of the permission piece.

 

Jocelyn Davis:    That’s right.  You’re absolutely right. There’s so many ways these days to be successful and not just in publishing but in any endeavor. There’s just new ways to get your message out there whether you’re an entrepreneur or you want to be part of a large company or you want to be a driver for Uber or whatever you want to do there’s just so many different ways now to do it. So I think for me it was also about that agility, knowing that I was going to keep moving forward and so I had that goal in mind but there were different ways that I could get there maybe it would be one way maybe it will be another way but that was okay because I knew what the end goal was. 

 

Jim Rembach:    I know you’ve got a lot of things that are going on. Of course the book and promoting that book and consulting practice. But if you start looking at all of those things, what are some of your goals? 

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Let’s see. So, my main goal is to frankly, just get this book into as many people’s hand as I can. The other is sort of a sub-goal if you will, is to develop training, learning program that goes with the book, because that’s something that I know how to do that’s what I’ve done my whole life, for my whole professional life is to build learning programs. And so, I’m working on that and again I’m hoping that I will be able to partner with a company to an existing company to do that but that doesn’t work out I’ll be okay doing it on my own. But I really want to get the book out there several different forms, the ideas in the book ** out there in several different forms. 

 

Jim Rembach:    And the Fast Leader Legion wishes you the very best. Now before we move on let’s get a quick word from our sponsor:

 

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Alright here we go Fast Leader Legion, it’s time for the Hump Day Hoedown. Okay Jocelyn, the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster.  Jocelyn Davis, are you ready to hoedown?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    I am. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Alright.  What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today? 

 

Jocelyn Davis:    What’s holding me back is my extremely introverted personality which mean that I don’t really enjoy or I find it tiring to be out there talking to people interacting with lots of people all the time. You know when you’re a leader or trying to be a leader you do need to interact with people you can’t just sit in the room and write book. So, that what’s hold me back.

 

Jim Rembach:    What is the best leadership advice you have ever received?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    The best leadership advice I have ever received is from Lao Tzu who is a 6th century BC Chinese philosopher, he wrote the Tao Teh Ching, a very famous work of philosophy poetry. And he has a verse in the Tao Teh Ching it says, “Of the master when his work is done his task fulfilled the people will say we did it ourselves.”

 

Jim Rembach:     What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Secret that contributes to my success is I think I do thing that scare me so I’m often scared to do things but I made a vow to myself many, many years ago that I was never going to let that stop me. Being scared of something was not going to stop me, so I do things that scare me.

 

Jim Rembach:    What do you feel is one of your best tools that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    Okay, so this is not a tool actually but I’m going to say it anyway because it’s a person, she’s not a tool, it’s my daughter. I think that being a parent, having a child is one of the greatest leadership learning experiences one could ever had. My daughter she’s not a tool, she’s a person but she just teaches me every day how to be a better leader. 

 

Jim Rembach:    What would be one book that you’d recommend to our listeners, and it could be from any genre? 

 

So, I’m going to recommend, well of course I would recommend my book, The Great’s on Leadership, that’s one but the other one that I would recommend is a book that I talked about in the Greats on leadership, which is surprisingly Frankenstein, by Mary Shelly. And everybody when I talk about this book they were like, “That’s not a leadership book, what are you talking about.” But I will tell you, Frankenstein is one of the best book for leaders that anybody could every read because it is all about a leader who fails miserably engaging with this creature that he’s created, that he’s built. And it’s about this scenario that so many leaders run into when you’ve created this thing, this project and ** new and it’s not working out and what do you do? And Frankenstein is all about a leader who really does the wrong thing, he does not talk with his monster. What I say is that, if you’re a leader you’ve got to get comfortable taking with your monsters because that’s what real courage is is.

 

Jim Rembach:    Okay, Fast Leader listeners you can find links to that and other bonus information from today show by going to fastleader.net/Jocelyn Davis. Okay, Jocelyn this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you but you can’t take everything you can only choose one, what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why?

 

Jocelyn Davis:    So I would take back the knowledge that it’s really never about me. That when there’s a conflict or when things are going wrong or somebody’s screaming at you or whenever things are going awry you have to remember that it is all about the other person. It’s about helping that other person through whatever it is they’re going through, and you can always do that you can always make everything right. But it’s really important to understand that they’re not thinking about you they’re thinking about themselves. So if you’re a leader, you need to realize this is not about me I need to focus on that person help them and that’s what it means to be leader.

 

Jim Rembach:    Jocelyn, it was an honor to spend time with you today, can you please share with the Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you?

 

Sure you can go to my website which is jocelynrdavis.com 

 

Jim Rembach:    Jocelyn Davis, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom, the Fast Leader legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. 

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster.

 

END OF AUDIO 

 

050: Jeofrey Bean: I couldn’t get them to agree

Jeofrey Bean Show Notes Page

Jeofrey Bean was hired as a market planner to help turn his company around. He was responsible for helping the company to develop products that the marketplace was going to love. The problem for Jeof was that he needed several different departments to work together to accomplish the company’s goals. And they weren’t. Being in a bind, Jeof got an idea that ultimately changed the company culture. Listen to Jeof tell his story so you can get over the hump.

Jeofrey grew up in the Boston area and then his family moved to Michigan where his passion about cars, the companies that make them and the people that buy, use and race them grew.

Jeofrey has had, and still has, many interests including loudspeaker design, documentaries, photography, jazz, hiking, and customer behavior.

While in high school, a friend’s dad was an engineer for Ford Motor Company and would bring home experimental vehicles, many for test driving and comments from drivers and passengers.  One day he told Jeof that the marketing people at Ford recommended that they increase the price on a new Lincoln model they made to compete more effectively with Cadillac and to increase sales.  That was the moment that Jeofrey recalls began his interest in customer behavior and marketing.

Jeofrey’s experience prior to going to college included a customer service position at a high end audio shop interacting with product reps, prototype and new products and customers. This experience increased his passion and curiosity for understanding why people buy what they do and what really makes them happy.

Throughout his career he has worked at small innovative businesses and dynamic Fortune 500 companies in the computer and telecommunications industries (including Sprint and AT&T) developing and marketing products and services.

In 2004, Jeofrey started Del Mar Research assisting companies in making successful decisions about the Internet, marketing and customer service to improve or innovate customer experience.

Jeofrey is the author of Customer Experience Rules! And the best-selling book The Customer Experience Revolution, based on experience, research and in-person interviews with many CX leaders. He is also a part-time Professor of Business Management and Marketing at UC San Diego Extension teaching classes in Online Marketing Strategies and Customer Experience Leadership.

Jeofrey currently resides in beautiful San Diego, California.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Listen to @JeofreyBean and get over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“It really gets me jazzed when someone gets it and goes and makes a difference” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet

“There’s a leadership evolution…it’s definitely changing and dynamic.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Know your do-for’s.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“What can I do for you that you’ll value?” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet

“As you get older you want to be relevant and valuable to the younger generation.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“I wanted them to see the product lifecycle for themselves.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“I respect what you know, I think collectively we have to agree.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Let’s get out of this my opinion, your opinion, and let’s observe them.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“You have to be patient, as far as taking yourself out of the center.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Even if you know it’s a conclusion you’ve come to, people want to come to their own.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Don’t be ego invested.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“It’s not about me, it’s about what we are trying to solve.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Personally and professionally, did I make a positive difference?” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“I want to be surprised by the different answers because I don’t know it all.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“You can know a bunch of things, but are you effective with that?” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

“Knowing things can be over-rated if you can’t be effective and efficient.” -Jeofrey Bean Click to Tweet 

Hump to Get Over

Jeofrey Bean was hired as a market planner to help turn his company around. He was responsible for helping the company to develop products that the marketplace was going to love. The problem for Jeof was that he needed several different departments to work together to accomplish the company’s goals. And they weren’t. Being in a bind, Jeof got an idea that ultimately changed the company culture. Listen to Jeof tell his story so you can get over the hump.

Advice for others

Take yourself out of the center and don’t be ego invested.

Holding him back from being an even better leader

The time to meet other leaders and get insights from them.

Best Leadership Advice Received

When Dave Marmonti said, “What can I do for you.” and he meant it.

Secret to Success

Providing an environment where people are truly free to express their concerns and ideas.

Best tools that helps in business or Life

Understanding the diversity of opinions and ideas and disciplines.

Recommended Reading

Onward: How Starbucks Fought for Its Life without Losing Its Soul

The Design of Everyday Things: Revised and Expanded Edition

Contacting Jeof

Website: http://www.delmarresearch.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeofreybean

Twitter: https://twitter.com/jeofreybean

Resources

Customer Experience Rules! Sample rules book by Jeofrey Bean

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligence practitioner, Jim Rembach.

 

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Jim Rembach:    Today I have the opportunity to have on my show somebody who was referred to me from a good friend of mine Carol Burens. Jeofrey Bean grew up in the Boston area and then his family moved to Michigan where his passion about cars, the companies that make them, and the people who buy them, use them and raised them grew. Jeofrey has had and still has many interests including loudspeaker design, documentaries, photography, jazz, hiking, and customer behavior. While in high school a friend’s dad was an engineer for Ford Motor Company, would bring home test vehicles many for driving and comments from drivers and passengers. One day he told Jeff that the marketing people at Fort recommended that they increase the price of a new Lincoln model they made to compete more effectively with Cadillac and to increase sales, that was the moment that Jeofrey recalls beginning his interest in consumer behavior and marketing.

 

Throughout his career he has worked at small innovative businesses and dynamic Fortune 500 companies in the computer and telecommunications industries developing and marketing products and services. In 2004, Jeofrey started Delmar research assisting companies in making successful decisions about the Internet marketing and customer service to improve or innovate customer experiences. Jeofrey is the author of customer experience rules and the best-selling book, The Customer Experience Revolution. He is also part-time professor of business management at UC San Diego extension teaching classes in online marketing strategies and customer experience leadership. Jeofrey currently resides in beautiful San Diego, California. Jeofrey Bean are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     I am absolutely ready to help you get over the hump.

 

Jim Rembach:     Thank you sir. I’ve given our listeners a little bit about you, but can you tell us what your current passion so that we can get to know you even better?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     My current passion is, other than authoring books, is really teaching at UC San Diego teaching online marketing strategies but also customer experience leadership because it’s edgy and it’s so new compared with a lot of business courses when you compare it with traditional  marketing courses. It really gets me jazz when somebody learns it gets it and then outside of the school they’re going and making a difference. 

 

Jim Rembach:     One of the things as you were mentioning that is that you talked about new and edgy and you use the word leadership, that’s one reason why we started the show, Fast Leader Show, is because leadership is so critically important when you start thinking about customer focus, employee engagement the whole human centric movement, listening to somebody earlier that talked about the English language being adapted little bit with the way that people use English for chat purposes and they were talking about the foundation of  English and proper word sentence structure and things like that, do you think that this is just an evolution of leadership? Or is it really something that’s totally different, a different language of leadership?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     I think it’s an evolution and sometimes it’s an evolution of leadership and sometimes it’s a reflection of how people interact and what they’re interacting with. For instance, if you look at the Google keyword search tool to see what words people are using to find things, let’s say that there were six or seven words or phrases that they were using this month we could look six months from now to see what people are looking for, if they’re looking for the same exact thing those words could be different, so there’s many evolutions taking place there’s a leadership evolution of language and communication then there’s how do we use technology to find what we want  kind of thing but one thing is it’s definitely changing, it’s very dynamic.

 

Jim Rembach:     When you start talking about change and also the legacy and the traditions of many new things were talking about is that we often have to look for inspiration, and one of the things that we do on the show is look at leadership quotes to help us with that, and Jeff I know, you have a rich background, living in a couple different places getting of the experience of the East Coast and Midwest and also now in the West Coast, is there a quote or two that helps you get a better sense of direction, can you share it with us?

 

Yeah there is and I think no matter where I’ve lived and no matter what situation I’ve been in I always say to myself and in the last two years I’ve said it to other people and I say, “Know your do force” it’s knowing what can I do for you that you’ll value. And whether it’s my nieces and my nephews, certainly as you get older you want to be relevant and valuable to the younger generation but also in business and in any situation even transitioning out to San Diego years ago, what is San Diego do for me? What can I do for San Diego? And so, to me it’s understanding those not only in economic level but in an emotional level and thinking more in long-term, what are my do force. 

 

Jim Rembach:     I love the way you said that. When I speak of do force there’s so many different things that come to mind when I start thinking about that, different contexts, different situations, I can always keep myself grounded if I would just think about, “Okay, what are my do force. 

Jeofrey Bean:     What’s my do force talking today? What’s my do force with my wife over the weekend? Students asking me for help or if I give a seminar to company and they’re asking me, it’s not just purpose but it’s really how can I be of value? How can I make a difference at the end of the day does valued?

 

Jim Rembach:     That’s interesting, there’s a couple of words when you were saying and you’re explaining that stood out to me and when I started thinking about do force I originally went there is that in terms of values, talking about virtues and you start talking about the things that are purpose driven for you, and it helps make it all kind of applicable. A lot of times we start like, “Okay, but how can I apply that? And I think do force is a great way of being able to do that, so thanks for sharing.

 

Jeofrey Bean:     You’re welcome great question.  

 

 I would dare to say, when you think about having your own business even the story about having the neighbor and the experimental vehicles I know that had to be exciting, but we all have humps that we have to get over and just going to the transitions of life, starting your own business, becoming an author trying to speak and influence others all those things represent a lot of humps that we have to get over where we often have to ask about our do force, is there a story that you can share with us that has helped ground you and helped to establish better do force?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     There’s many along the way but I when I go way back to I’d say the early ‘90s when I was a lot younger but also when I was learning a lot and working at Hazel Micro Computer. We made modems and we’re small company in Atlanta, we also made software. Part of my job is market planner, young Jeff was supposed to help turn around the company, and I certainly had a really good demand side, few debts, just kind of how I live and how I think. You can put as much technology and marketing and all that stuff is front of me but I’m always thinking about how does it link to the outside world? And so, I was kind of in a bind where it was where you’re supposed to help to improve the sales of this company and turn the company around and yet nobody inside the company, particularly engineers weren’t talking to marketing people, we even have engineers who divided themselves up into synchronous engineers and asynchronous engineers and they live in different worlds, and they rarely left Norcross, Georgia where our office was and we also have our manufacturing there, and I couldn’t get them to agree even on, “Now, we need to get rid of some old products and by the way, you’re working on some new stuff that you like to work on, but we need to have you work on things that we can introduce to the market that people will adapt and love.” 

 

And so, one day I got this idea that I want to take these folks to lunch, some marketing people some engineering people some product managers, “Why don’t we go to lunch and then after lunch let’s go this new place called CompUSA in Jimmy Carter blvd. in Atlanta” and this was new at that time to have like a supermarket kind of store like a Staples but it was all filled with computer stuff, with **9:46 and a section in the **  products. And I walked into the store and I said, “I just want to share with you guys, I didn’t want the academic discussion with them about what a product life cycle was and all of that, I wanted them to see where some of the products that they design, put their heart and soul into, I wanted them to see the cycle for themselves. We went to the back of the store where our highest performing, most edgy modems were at that time including software, and at date they were selling from suggested retail, but then by the time we made it up to the front, where the cash registers were, a lot of the products that they’ve work on just two years ago were in this kind of bargain bin and markdown and they were a little freaked out. And I said, “This is where it happens, this is just one channel of many channels now, at that time we were only in two distribution channels and the PC-driven market was nine or ten so the company had to learn that—right products and the right channels for the right customer and what the customer and what the ‘do force’ were for the customers. 

 

And so, it was letting the outside world educate the marketing people who were very data-driven at the time and then showing the engineers what happens in the outside world and let them see that for themselves. We watched people in the buying process and shopping process, whether it was B2B for their home office. I think they got a good idea, the fact that their product was viewed as an entire thing by customers not engineering did this, marketing did this, salespeople did this, this was a whole the modem box the modem was in here there was software in here. 

 

When we got back we’ve some really good discussions based on their experience of what they thought that they observed when people looked at the box and what’s the job at the box in retail for instance or later on in catalogs or now on the Internet. So, that was a turning point for my ability to communicate with people who basically say, “Well, Jeff you work in market planning and you really don’t know what we know” and I said, “But I respect what you know, I just think collectively we have to agree on what is the demand side look like? What do people do when they make decisions about buying our product or the competitor product? And then we need to use whatever each one of us knows for the company and for the customer, so that helped change the culture.

 

The other thing I did was I started a little silent program, and announced, where I would just bring in people that match our existing customers and I would bring them over to engineering and I’d introduce them and I’d just say, “Hey, I’m giving a tour here and I’d ask one of the engineers to not only demonstrate a product that they were working on, we couldn’t show them anything for proprietary of course, but what I would do is I would say, “Could you now let the customer use that product? Let them open up the communication software and make the connection at the highest rate they could.” What the engineers learned was that they needed to do more testing with people outside that matched either our existing customers or customers we’d like to have. That wasn’t part of the culture at that time it was more like engineers would design this great high-speed modem, back then in the old days high-speed modems were proprietary and then the standards would happen and then many companies would go in, they would basically make modems and an engineer would bring it down the hallway for another engineer, get the approval from a performance standpoint, but not necessarily bring our customers into the process of development. 

 

Even the box, what is the box look like? Like I ask our box people, why is there dog on our box? And nobody knew. So, it was really kind of trying to let them know that this isn’t about what Jeff wants as far as our communication across the departments and our involvement with people outside, from whether we’re trying to fix an existing product, whether it’s the pricing marketing communications we’re trying to develop it but it’s really that whether you like it or not you’re playing in a much bigger world where there’s a whole bunch of people on the demand side that are going to help us turn this company around we need to leverage them. 

 

So, let’s get out of this, ‘this is my opinion your opinion,’ let’s go observe them and interact with them, watch them, appreciate them and then comeback with their own conclusions and exchange, let’s exchange those ideas. For me it was the turning point and—well, I didn’t stay very long at the company after that. I think it kind of architected a basic part of who I was professionally going on, whether it was product development, marketing service development, it was fundamental to have that outside in view and then come to some conclusions. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Thanks for sharing that story, Jeff. A couple of things stood out to me, one of the thing that I always mention a lot is that most of the time, not some of the time, you’re not the best one to tell the story. And we often that because we want people to buy into our thoughts and ideas and we want to make a difference and we think that pushing our explanation, our ideas, our statistical analysis all of that is what were supposed to be doing. For me, I learned in that example you learn to be quiet. 

 

Jeofrey Bean:     Yes, yes I did. It was difficult at that time. 

 

Jim Rembach:     You allowed people come to their own conclusions. There’s also one thing that you mentioned there that’s very intentional practice and activity in the areas of positive psychology. And it’s well worth to educate yourself on appreciative inquiry because one of the practices that they have in appreciative inquiry is around something called ‘unlikely pairs.’ When you start talking about cross-mixing all of these different functional groups and personality types in individuals, what you’re doing is you’re creating unlikely pairs and giving them the opportunity to find commonality and common ground, so you were the orchestrator  that, so good job. 

 

Now, if you were to think about somebody who’s in a particular role, and it doesn’t matter where they are in an organization but they’re kind of fighting that whole no silo dysfunction function, if you were to give them one piece of advice, what would it be?

 

I’d say that you have to be patient as far as taking yourself out of the center and giving information examples that will educate but allow people to come to their own conclusions. Even if you know that it’s a conclusion you’ve come to, I think that in some cases there are people who want to come to their own conclusions, I certainly like to do that, but when you’re in that crunch time where things are little crazy and stuff has to get done or turned around, I think giving examples outside of yourself outside of the company, “Hey, here’s how they do it over here.” “Or did you see what made this successful or turnaround?” and then asking good questions, “Do you think we could do something like that? Do you want to try something like that? I think that would be pretty low risk or it would be high risk but it might be Hail Mary time.” I think taking yourself, don’t be ego-invested, it just take yourself out of it and educate and inform and plant the seeds so that people—they only have this far a short distance to go to say, “Oh! Wow, I think I’ve got an idea or I’m going to come to that conclusion and suddenly things move along. As long as people know why they’re coming to that conclusion to, it isn’t that Jeff being said or Jim said, it’s they’ve seen good company examples or other things. It’s not about me it’s about what we’re trying to solve. 

 

Jim Rembach:     I like that way that you say that, for me, I don’t care who gets the credit as long as it moves in the direction that you it needs to go, it doesn’t matter to me. I know you have, of course you’re the first background a lot of experience, authoring, teaching, all that stuff we talked about teaching being something that’s important to you, but when you start thinking about your goals which one is your big ones?

 

 Jeofrey Bean:     I think the biggest one is—years from now when I look back and say, personally and professionally, did I make a positive difference? With younger people in teaching it’s really helping to pass along what you know so that they can go and be great leaders and experience makers and change makers, those are the big ones. More near term, it’s helping companies improve their customer experience and meeting people and so forth. I really get charged, I get energized when people, whether they’re working for company and were in an  environment whether it’s a seminar or just having a chat, when they get it and go out and do something and they send me an email and they call me up and say, “That really worked!” And it certainly the same thing in the university environment, people are going to leave the university, they’re going to go out in the big world, and I try to tell the students to think beyond just getting a good grade, I want to hear a year from now, two years from now, that you’ve done something credibly marvelous because what we did in this class. And I get that feedback and I it’s the charge, it makes energy a very positive energy.

 

Jim Rembach:     And Fast Leader Legion wishes you the very best, Now, before we move on, let’s get a quick word from our sponsor.

 

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Alright, here we go Fast Leader Legion, it’s time for the—Hump Day Hoedown. Okay, Jeff, the Hump Day Hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So, I’m going to ask you several questions and your job is to give us robust yet rapid responses that are going to help us move onward and upward faster. Jeofrey Bean, are you ready to hoedown?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     I am ready.

 

Jim Rembach:     What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today? 

 

Jeofrey Bean:     It’s the time to meet other leaders and get insights from them, where we can learn from each other. There’s just a never ending learning process, so I’d like to meet more leaders, exchange insights and experience. Could you imagine being able to just have all kind of time to that, I would love that. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What is the best leadership advice you have received? 

 

Jeofrey Bean:     The best leadership advice I have ever received is when I walked in to the office of one of the best leaders I’ve ever worked for, a fellow named Dave Marmonte, when I was working at AT&T, and he said, “What can I do for you? And meant it. And I told him, “ I had some things that I needed help with on a project that affected him also but more so I said, ‘Well, here’s exactly what you can do for me, I started to walk out of his office.” He said, “Where are you going?” and he made me close the door right in front of me made the calls, delivered the messages, gave me coaching, and 10 minutes later I walked out feeling like a million bucks and this guy was the real deal. He understood that it was to serve in a good way, and by example from his behavior was also beyond that meeting. But that was a really powerful thing he said to me because he meant it and he did it, so it was awesome. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success? 

 

Jeofrey Bean:     Providing for the long-term an environment where people really, truly are free to express their ideas and concerns where you’re listening and an environment, whether it’s at a company or seminar  or a classroom or just confiding with a friend, I think really, truly being able to deliver that—no penalties as a matter of fact we’re going to gain from this by exchanging ideas. Being able to genuinely provide that and be known for that is something that’s been very special. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What do you feel is one of your best tools that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     It’s understanding the diversity of opinions and ideas and discipline. I love the fact that when you ask the same question to people from different places or from different backgrounds, to me I want to be surprised by the different answers because I don’t know at all.

 

Jim Rembach:     What would be one book from any genre that you would recommend to our listeners?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     It’s a tie for me, I like Howard Schultz’s book it’s called “Onward” and he’s just an incredible leader and inspirational fellow. But I also like Don Norman’s, “Design of Everyday Things” it kind of a tossup. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Okay, Fast Leader listeners you can find links to that and other bonus information which will include a free chapter from Jeff’s book on the show notes page, that you’ll be able to find at fastleader.net/Jeofrey Bean. Now, I want to make sure that everybody knows that Jeofrey Bean is spelled a little bit uniquely, it’s J-E-O-F-R-E-Y, that’s Joefrey Bean. 

 

Okay, Jeff, this is my last Hump Day Hoedown question: Imagine you were given the opportunity to go back to the age 25 and you’ve been given the opportunity to take the knowledge and skills that you have now back with you, but you can’t take it all you can only take back one thing, so what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     It’s understanding, and that being effective and efficient is more important than a whole bunch of other things. You can just get out puking all bunch of things that are you effective with that you know a bunch of things but are you effective with that? As a matter of fact, several CEO’s have commented to me that they said, “Knowing things can be overrated if you can’t be effective and efficient. And I said,  “Absolutely.” You try to get more wisdom as you get older and as I’m working on that I think I’m realizing being effective and efficient seems to be coming up as a priority more often. So if I was 25 and knew that, Wow! That could make a big difference that could be powerful.

 

Jim Rembach:     Jeff I think you just explained where the ‘do for’ comes from. Jeff it an honor to spend time with you today can you please share with Fast Leader Legion how they can connect with you?

 

Jeofrey Bean:     Certainly. Thanks for having me on Jim, I appreciate it, You can check out my website at delmarresearch.com, also contact me by e-mail, jbean@delmarresearch.com or give a call directly at 858-334- 9266, and let’s have a chat. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Jeofrey Bean, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom the Fast Leader Legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot! Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and subscribe, if you haven’t already, head on over the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster.

 

END OF AUDIO

050: Jeofrey Bean: I couldn’t get them to agree

 

 

Honoree Corder on the @FastLeaderShow

011: Honoree Corder: You need to speak

Podcast Show Notes with Honoree Corder

Honoree shares her story about something so many find terrifying. While taking a public speaking class her instructor told her, “You need to speak.” Honoree found herself finally realizing what the meaning of her words were several years later when after a speaking opportunity an attendee came up to her and thanked her for her words. Then she realized there is an opportunity to speak words into people and that they may not live into for years to come. It’s a power that can bring hope and requires a lot of care.

Honoree Corder was raised on a farm in near Salem Center, Ohio and in Albuquerque, New Mexico by traditionally educated yet very entrepreneurial parents. She was also a foster kid and children’s home resident, attending four high schools and becoming very good at meeting new people, adapting to new environments and learning to be extremely flexible. While she didn’t attend college, she overcame her childhood challenges and became a successful entrepreneur by becoming a voracious reader and student of human behavior with an unstoppable positive attitude.

After several years in the corporate world she decided to transition to pursuing her passion of helping others realize their greatest potential. As a coach, she empowers business professionals and entrepreneurs to go from “disorganized and frustrated” to “focused and profitable” by breaking through the time-money wall and creating the business that supports their ideal life.

Honoree is the author of 15 books, including Vision to Reality, The Successful Single Mom book series, If Divorce is a Game, These are the Rules, and her most recent Business Dating: Applying Relationship Rules in Business for Ultimate Success.

She spends every moment of her free time with her amazing family, reading, learning languages, and squeezing the juice out of life.

Tweetable Quotes and Mentions

Check out @Honoree getting over the hump on the @FastLeaderShow Click to Tweet

“Everyone is born with the seeds of greatness within them.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“Some people buy into the fact that they can be great, and they are.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“Most of the time people are not their behavior.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“What someone does for a living is not who they are, it’s what they do.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“A lot of people put stock in I am this, as opposed to I do this.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“We live in a time when there is a new great book every minute.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“We all have the opportunity to speak words into people.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“The only limitations you have are the ones that you hold on to.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“I want to speak words of life, possibility and hope into people.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“Playing small doesn’t serve the world.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“Not owning your greatness doesn’t serve the world.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

“If there’s something you’ve heard over and over again, listen to that.” -Honoree Corder Click to Tweet

Hump to Get Over

Honoree shares her story about the limiting beliefs that keeps us all from realizing our dreams and potential. She believes you are capable of anything you put your mind to and the limits you place upon yourself and that you hold on to are place in your own mind and you have the power to remove them.

Leadership Epiphany

There is an opportunity we all have to speak words into people and we need to be careful with it.

Advice for you

There is a reoccurring message in your life that is meant to get to you. The sooner you listen and take action the better for you.

Holding her back from being an even better leader

Limiting beliefs

Best leadership advice ever received

Being a leader of self is the best way to be a leader of others.

Secret to Success

Extreme self-care

Best resources in work or life

My network

Recommended Reading

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM)
Think and Grow Rich: The Landmark Bestseller – Now Revised and Updated for the 21st Century
The Law of Success In Sixteen Lessons by Napoleon Hill

Gifts from Honoree

  • Two free chapters from Vision to Reality: How Short Term Massive Action Equals Long Term Maximum Results
  • Copy of: Tall Order! 7 Master Strategies to Organize Your Life and Double Your Success in Half the Time
    Both available for download

Contacting Honoree

Website: www.honoreecorder.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Honoree

More Resources

Self-confidence formula from Napoleon Hill

 

Show Transcript: 

Click to access edited transcript

011: Honoree Corder: You need to speak

Intro: Welcome to the Fast Leader Podcast, where we explore convenient yet effective shortcuts that will help you get ahead and move forward faster by becoming a better leader. And now here’s your host, customer and employee engagement expert and certified emotional intelligent practitioner, Jim Rembach.

Jim Rembach:     Thanks Kimberly. Alright Fast Leader legion, the person who I have on our show today is somebody has overcome a lot of obstacles in life and did not allow that to stop her from being the person that she is today and impacting so many others. Her name is Honoree Corder that has a French origin to it. It’s spelled like Honoree, however it’s Honoray so we want to make sure that we get that right for her when you reference her and tell other people about this awesome show that you’re getting ready to participate in today.

 

Honoree was on a farm near Salem Center, Ohio and in Albuquerque, New Mexico by traditionally educated yet very entrepreneurial parents. She was a foster kid and child home resident and attended four high schools which helped her become very good at meeting new people, adapting to new environments and learning to be extremely flexible. While she didn’t attend college she overcame her childhood challenges and became a successful entrepreneur by becoming a voracious reader and student of human behavior with an unstoppable positive attitude. Honoree has gone on to write several books and be a coach and inspiration to many. Honoree Corder, are you ready to help us get over the hump?

 

Honoree Corder:     You bet, absolutely.

 

Jim Rembach:      Fantastic. Now, I’ve given our listeners a brief introduction about you, but can you please tell us, what is your current passion so that we can get to know you better?

 

Honoree Corder:     Great.  My current passion is helping people to have a complete transformation and live the life that they thought was only possible but is actually really possible. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What does that really mean? A lot of times we look to others to have us—idea of what that would be for us and we often spend really a lifetime searching. So, what does that mean?

 

Honoree Corder:     My work with people is—as an executive and business coach, but that is not entirely accurate everyone wants a title, right? What I do is—my tagline is: “I double your income and triple your time off.” But actually, what I wanted to do is get my get grabby mitts on people and help them to see themselves as I see them with all of the potential and all the promise that their life holds. So I help them to make the most out of their business, I help them to make the most of their thought processes, out of their  physical body, their emotional intelligence all of those things. I work with people from sea level to 30,000 feet.

 

Jim Rembach:     As I listen to you talk there was a comment that I read by somebody who was an author of a leadership book. And he was referring to how certain responses are given or provided by others, the way that they behave, he was talking about a large number of people, and he said, some people are just so stupid. And I’m like, “Really, this came from an author of a leadership book”? So, you mentioned something about you seeing that in other people, is that something that can be seen and found in a lot of people or is it really just a small subset?

 

Honoree Corder:      I think everyone is born with the seeds of greatness within them. I think there’s one partner turn in one part nature and I think some people buy into the fact that they can be great and amazing and terrific and so they are. Some people buy into the message from whoever they get it from whether it’s their parents or their friends or their teachers that are not all that smart, they’re not all that capable and they live in to that and that breaks my heart. 

 

Jim Rembach:     You know, kind of funny having three smaller kids, I have a middle schooler and two elementary so it’s 11,9, & 6 talking about this—what we do as adults and molding what they think about themselves. First of all, we know that from a personality perspective, people are wired a certain way and then we accentuate that and sometimes not in the best ways.  And there is a fascinating book that I read many years ago and it has guided me in a lot of ways, it’s a book called Mindset by Dr. Carol Dweck. 

 

She talks about many of the things that you just mentioned. For example, and it’s so commonplace but we see that we do it often like you never should tell a child, ‘you’re smart’. Because what’s the opposite of that? So, if you’re not smart then that means you’re dumb. So, what we should talk to them about is the effort that they put it. We should talk to them about the details of their work and how you appreciate the fact that they really focused in on this and did a great job on that. And then that ultimately will result in you having greater knowledge, and things like that, and that will what makes you smart. But telling somebody directly—you’re smart—it may seem like a compliment but it’s the opposite that is really a bad thing.

 

Honoree Corder:     Interesting. I think that there’s the behavior in there as a person. Most of the times people are not their behavior. So, when I’m educating my daughter on behavior, I will say, “I love you and you’re wonderful and amazing just as you are.” The choice that you made, I’m not exactly excited about that choice that you made, but that doesn’t define who you are. Just as what someone does for a living is not who they are, that’s what they do, but a lot of people put stock in, “I am this as opposed to I do this.”

 

Jim Rembach:     That’s fantastic. I appreciate the dialogue that we’ve had there’s so much insight and we can probably make this in our show but we got a move forward. On the Fast Leader show we always talk about inspiration and things that can give us a reminding and a grounding rod, we talk a lot about leadership quotes. Is there a quote or two or maybe even a passage that stands out for you as something that always reminds you, to say, reset yourself or change your mindset so that you can move forward, can you share that with us, please?

 

Honoree Corder:     Sure. I’m a huge fan of Napoleon Hill and in both of my favorite books, [Laugh] that he has written, “Think and Grow Rich and the Law of Success,” he has something called the self- confidence formula. And  20 something years ago, when I read, Thinking Grow Rich for the first time, I memorize, at his suggestion, the self-confidence formula and said it over and over and over again. It is something that I’m including in a new book that I’m writing, I’m referencing that material because I think it’s so important for people to know that it’s there. 

 

It’s interesting because we live in a time where there’s a new great book available every minute. As I was telling someone yesterday, they’re the self-help classics, they’re the foundations to all of the work that all of us who write books refer to and defer to in our work and that book “Think and Grow Rich” and it’s also in the Law of Success as well that self-confidence formula those words that you’re saying to yourself, if not the passage it’s the idea that I can reset, I can go back and reference that and push the reset button and start back from that place of power, that’s my recommendation. 

 

Jim Rembach:    Was the passage in their as you we’re explaining to it? 

 

Honoree Corder:     It’s the self-confidence formula. I have the talent and skills and abilities to create anything that I desire but I have to be committed, I have to take the action is the gist of it, it’s a multi-paragraph formula, that whole entire passage is—I don’t know if you’ve seen it, it’s like five or six paragraphs that you commit to memory and then repeat aloud once a day until you embody that, and that’s the passage that I refer to.

 

Jim Rembach:     That’s perfect. What we can do is we can put that on our show notes page for those who have not had the opportunity to review that. And that show notes page are going to be at fastleader.net/Honoree Corder. So, we talked a little bit about mindset in overcoming a lot of obstacles in life and we talked about epiphanies and few other people say Aha’s, is there a moment in your life when you’ve had an epiphany or maybe something that occurred that later you had an epiphany about that has guided you as a person, to be the person you are and positively impact so many that you’ve impacted so far and are yet to impact, can you please share that story with us?

 

Honoree Corder:     Absolutely. I took a public speaking class in 1997 and my instructor was teaching us through a four week evening class, she was a friend of mine and profane 1995 cell glycolic out and start their life teaching after a four-week evening class—she was a friend of mine, she’s was a presentation coach—and she invited me to take her class and I took the class she would have us get out and give this presentations and then give us feedback. One of the things she said to me was’” Honoree you need to speak, if you don’t speak people are missing out. And I heard it but I didn’t hear. It wasn’t until years when I was asked to begin speaking and I started speaking more and more. People would say, “I really appreciated the thing you said about” or “I hear your voice in my head telling me I can do something when I didn’t think that I can do it.” My own voice in my head is telling me that I can do that and I realize that’s exactly the gift that she gave to me. So there’s something very powerful, the epiphany for me is that there is this opportunity that we all have to speak words to people and that you have to be very careful about what you say. You have to speak words, like I have to say to my daughter, “It’s what you did it’s not who you are.” And I tell my clients and my readers and people that I come into contact with that you are capable of anything you put your mind, here you have no limitations the only limitations you have are the ones that you hold on to and that you make up in your mind, that was my epiphany. Those words the people speak in to us, we may not even live in to that till years and years later. So things that I am saying now may no come to fruition until much later but I am so intentional and purposeful in what I say because I want to speak words of life and possibility and hope into people. 

 

Jim Rembach:    First of all, thank you for sharing that. You mentioned something about, it’s taking time for you to realize what you she was telling you. Sometimes it can take a lifetime for us to finally click, for some of us, at least me I should say—but if you we’re to  give a piece of advice to the Fast Leader legion about that particular story, what would you tell them about, not listening but really “listening”?

 

Honoree Corder:     I think we get, and I have this deal with God, if you send me the feather, send me the feather again.” I think the message is come repeated messages that were supposed to get. At first they come quietly so it’s the feather, the brick the book and then the mock truck. [Laugh] So my request is: “Could you send the feather a few times so that I hear the message.” But I think that there’s something that to each person that’s listening there’s a recurring theme in your life, there’s a recurring message that is meant to get to you. And the sooner you listen then the sooner you get the message. The sooner you get action on it the better for you. Because playing small doesn’t serve the world not owning your greatness doesn’t serve the world, it doesn’t serve you, so that’s my advice. If there’s a recurring there, if there’s something you’ve heard over and over again, listen to that. The first person that said to me, “Your voice in my head telling me I can do it, I’ve chosen to listen to that and make it louder than the voice in my head telling me that I can’t do it.” And that was the moment where I recognize that I was able to speak words of possibility and help in encouragement into people and it was my job to do that. But it took me a long time to own that and to do it even though I started hearing that message in my early 20’s. It took me a long time to own that so we all have these messages that come us hear them sooner, that’s my advice. 

 

Jim Rembach:      There’s another keyword that you she said in there that I often repeat back to a lot of folks because here in the Fast Leader show we’re talking about redefining what leadership is, the fact is that, we all have to lead. If we don’t do a good job of leading ourselves there is no way possible in this world that we’ll be able to lead others. We’ll be even looked at to be someone who can lead others. I think for me, I’ve often looked at certain folks and say:” You know what, I would love to be on their team because I want to be on the team for that person so that they can lead me.” Ownership is a really critical part of our day-to-day life. And many of us just squander through. And many times, for me, through certain days, certain times of the day, certain weeks of the month, I don’t necessarily own things, right? And so I need to do better job of hunkering down, as they say and owning things more, thank you for that piece of advice. 

If you could, tell us a little bit about the current work that you’re doing, you mentioned about writing a book, what really excites you and gives you energy because you’ve given us broad scope of helping others, but what specifically is the thing that charges you?

 

Honoree Corder:     There are two things. One is when I’m working one-on-one with someone and they tell me that they have become a new person through our work together, that is just the coolest thing ever. And so maybe you want me to expand on that a little bit. What I do is speak words into people, give them permission to do the things that they want to do. It’s everything from the very simple—if you want to do business with someone, ask them. If you want to write a state plan, or you want to handle their legal matters, their M&A transactions, pick up the phone and say, “This is my area of genius, I am awesome at this, I would love to serve you in this way,” take ownership of your greatness in that way. In my work with people that is my focus, helping them to figure out the thing that gives them the juice and help them to do more of that. 

 

The other thing that happens now, every single day, which is super cool because it’s kind of my—I was listening to a podcast yesterday and someone said, ‘Reading books for you is like giving a heroin addict a pound of heroin.” And I thought, “Oh! That’s so me, I’m such a nerd for that. But because I have read in several books, I now get a message every single day from a reader who said, ‘I found your book just in the nick of time and it change the trajectory of my life.” I think that was so amazing and humbling, that the words that I write in isolation and I have this avatar of this person that I want to read my words and to feel better about their life and about their future, that is coming back to me through Facebook messages and e-mails. I got one in the mail yesterday, like someone actually sent me a letter with a stamp on it, and I was said, “Really, that’s awesome, I love that.

 

Jim Rembach:      That’s definitely going the extra mile to give you feedback these days.

 

Honoree Corder:     Absolutely.

 

Jim Rembach:     What goals do you have for the future? 

 

Honoree Corder:     Oh! Gosh. I have a few books to write this year on my-to-do list. My family—are goal is to go mobile by the middle of year next year. So, we’re going to be living mobile, travelling around, staying in different places and not having an actual home but being homeless on purpose, being virtual, so we’re working for that. 

 

Jim Rembach:     We might have to do a follow up show on that, that’s amazing thought. For me, I think we’d have to have 15 garage sales before we even…

 

Honoree Corder:     Actually, we have had the first several phases of that process, the process of going from the big house to the little place to live. And then looking through everything and saying, ‘Do I really need this thing that I held on to? It’s like, ‘Someone gave me this beautiful Waterford Crystal, actually they were Tiffany candle holders years ago, and I never put candles on then because they were from Tiffany’s I don’t want to get smut on them. I never light any candles in them, I just dusted them and carry them around— and them we’re heavy because they’re from Tiffany. And so I finally just said, ‘This need a new home, someone else needs to dust this and someone else who has a little less—whatever—anxiety about getting some soot on a candle. [Laugh] But we’ve gone through the layers of it and now everything we do is, ‘What is it that we need to do in order to live this life of abundance and travel and just running around and being free in finding all of that. 

 

Jim Rembach:     That’s awesome.  Hopefully somebody will buy those Tiffany candles and put them in their storage facility. [Laugh] Alright, the entire Fast Leader legion wishes you the very best on everything that you’re targeting for your future. Alright, gang, now it’s time to move on to the rapid pace part of our show and that’s the—Hump Day Hoedown. Alright, Fast Leader listeners this is the time where we ask Honoree several questions and she gives us fast answers so that we can move onward and upward faster. Honoree are you ready to hoedown?

 

Honoree Corder:     I’m ready, fast, quickly. 

 

Jim Rembach:   Spoken like a Texan, alright. What do you think is holding you back from being an even better leader today? 

 

Honoree Corder:     Limiting beliefs with everybody. I’m the same as everybody else, I have limiting beliefs and I’m working on getting rid of those and expanding my consciousness every single day. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What’s the best leadership advice you have every received?

 

Honoree Corder:     That being a leader of self is the best way to be a leader of others. 

 

Jim Rembach:     What is one of your secrets that you believe contributes to your success?

 

Honoree Corder:     Extreme self-care.

 

Jim Rembach:     We may have to elaborate that on another show. What do you feel is one of your best resources that helps you lead in business or life?

 

Honoree Corder:     My network. I have a really great group of people that I rely on to help me to work through ideas and strategies and challenges and that’s your peer group, your relationships or the people that you rely on when you need move forward or get unstuck or whatever. 

 

Jim Rembach:     That sounds like a Napoleon Hill influence at well. What would be one book that you would recommend to our listeners? Other than your own.

 

Honoree Corder:     Oh! Gosh. I listen to your other podcasts and I thought to myself, and each time, how can you recommend only one book. So, I’m going to go with ‘The Miracle Morning”. Because I already mentioned my other two favorites. The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod, life changer—I don’t know if you of that book or you know about Hal but that is a favorite book. And then, I’m just going to say that on my website I have my favorite books. So, if you want to know the rest of them, they’re not even all on there but it’s a good start. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Alright, Fast Leader listeners, you can find links to that book and many others again on our show notes page and that’s going to be at fastleader.net/Honoree Corder. And Honoree you even have a special gift for our listeners, don’t you? Tell us a little bit about that.

 

Honoree Corder:     I have not one but two gifts, cause that’s how I roll.  

 

Jim Rembach:     Awesome. 

 

Honoree Corder:      So, if you go to honoreecorder/podcast you can get a free copy of my first book that went to get croissant and antiviral they’ll actually go to and honor rate quarter/pod cast eating that are actually/podcast you can actually get a free copy of my first book, Tall Order. And you can also get two free chapters of my book Vision to Reality. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Fantastic. We appreciate those gifts and we look forward to reading those and more coming from you in the future. So, now to last question of the Hump Day Hoedown: Imagine you  woke up tomorrow morning and you were 25 years old all over again but you are blessed you have the opportunity to keep everything that you know today with you. You are given the responsibility to manage a team that’s underperforming and disengage. Your job is to turn these folks around. Now, you get up in the morning you realize what happened you head out to work, what do you do now?

 

 Honoree Corder:     First of all, I’m a little offended that you don’t think that I’m 25, but we’ll just going to skip right over that. [Laugh] I am going to find out each of my teams ‘whys’. Why are they coming to work? What did they want most in the world? And if where they need to be is on that team and moving forward, I’m going to help them to live into their potential and take ownership of their greatness and come up with a plan and a vision and move themselves forward. And if they don’t need to be there, then I’m going to help them find their right path and have a transformation because that’s what I do. 

 

Jim Rembach:     That’s awesome. Honoree, it was an honor to spend time with you today, please share with the Fast Leader legion how that they can connect with you?

 

Honoree Corder:     honoreecorder.com. 

 

Jim Rembach:     Perfect. Honoree, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom the Fast Leader legion honors you and thanks you for helping us get over the hump. Woot, Woot!

 

Thank you for joining me on the Fast Leader show today. For recaps, links from every show, special offers and access to download and surprise, if you haven’t already, head on over to the fastleader.net so we can help you move onward and upward faster. 

 

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